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    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMay 18th 2011
     
    Hi all.......

    I have to say that I am really scared. My husband's decline seems to be by the minute now.......He has been accepted into the gap program for the highest level of care, we have finally found a bed in a nursing home, but we can't possibly pay for this. He actually fell out of the car yesterday.....one of his many falls. I try my best, but I can't keep up with him. And on it goes........

    Thanks for letting me vent......
  1.  
    AnnMW1157, I understand what you mean. My dh has not started falling yet but if his balance getting worse and him not being able to pay attention is a precurser to falls, he is on his way. As far as such a steady decline, my dh has declined exceptionally fast for the last four days. Wonder if it has to do with the full moon? Some things he could do in am he could not do in pm.. he has become more incontinent as the last four days have evolved. He is physically slower and mentally REALLY slower. With that said, tonight while at his brother's house when asked to stick out his tongue, he did. In the am when trying to clean his mouth he never knows what his tongue is, how to stick it out, or anything having to do with it. Did I feel stupid........ Even with me giving him examples of what I am trying to have him do, he usually does not get it....... It is very scary and you are not even venting...... just scared and concerned. Even if you were venting,,,,,,,, it is ok on this site........ sending hugs and prayers to you and your dh.
  2.  
    Ann--I'm not familiar with the gap program--what is it? You said you found a NH bed, but can't afford it. Have you looked into qualifying for Medicaid?
    •  
      CommentAuthormary75*
    • CommentTimeMay 19th 2011
     
    This for me was the toughest stage. Where you can, make it easier on yourself and pace yourself. Easier said than done, I know; the NH should help. Know that you can't stop the process, but please don't exhaust yourself in the meantime. If someone wants you to do something that uses up your energy and is not going to help your husband, just say, "I'm not up to it.
    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMay 19th 2011
     
    marilyninMD- This is our states way of qualifying for Medicaid if you are 'stuck in the middle'. It is a Medicaid waiver program for those not about to do private pay and not eligible for Medicaid. This would make him eligible for Medicaid, but we still have a patient share.

    mary75*- It is a tough stage and I know it will be better for my husband that he accept nursing home care. The only road block is the co-pay. I'm alone and we've never had outside help. Nothing like living in a small town and in a state that says this just should happened to someone my husband's age......Hence, lack of programs.