Coughed so long and hard from the virus that I got 3 weeks ago, I got a compression fracture of the 4th lumbar vertebra. I guess that 81-year-old bones didn't help. Dr. says it will take another 4-6 weeks to heal. Thanks, Marsh, for your previous posting re. impaction. Codeine (for pain) does slow things down. Was that your letter to the medical journal the Joang posted recently? It's excellent!
I have gone ahead and booked an opera trip to Verona for end of July. This has been on my "want-to-do-as-soon-as-dh-is-in-a-nursing-home-list" and now that he is, I decided to go for it. I'll only be gone for four days, and see three operas! I've wanted to do this for years, but dh always complained it was too expensive. Well, there ARE some advantages to making all the decisions myself and having no one to answer to. I'll be travelling and eating with a group so I should be able to find someone to talk to.
Great. I'm following a compression fracture, a roomful of parrots, and a night at the opera.
This morning when I got up where my wife these days is extremely busy, she was wearing a christmas wreath around her neck, my t-shirt on her head, and had already dragged the quilt off the bed and down into the kitchen. When I picked it up a cat raced out. The kitchen faucet was turned around and fully on however we learn and I had the shutoff valves closed. Going back upstairs with the quilt, Dianne noticed me and welcomed me to join her in the druid rituals she was performing sliding her empty purse under the bottom sheet to join her toothbrush, a sock, a magazine, and some piece of plastic I can't identify but kept because it probably should be reattached to whatever it was supposed to do.
I pulled the soap out of the cupboard which I hide because she eats soap now, and the toilet paper which is her favorite multipurpose utility. I pick up no less than 20 bits of crumpled and shredded toilet/tissue paper from every odd place a day. I don't make the beds until late because there's no point and I don't pick up everything all the time for the same reason.
When the geriatric specialist shrugged whether the meds were actually helping anymore or what they were doing after being on them three years, I took her off all of them. She refused to open her mouth and would hide them in her gums and then hide them around the house. One is a time release capsule so putting it in yogurt or something would still be two or three large hits. That's the 75mg antidepressant. All advice was coming off those is a horrible experience and must be done slowly.
This is day 29 without any meds. She now speaks in complete sentences and can follow consecutive thought for a minute. Her mood is normal overall although there are some momentary strains on her equilibrium. She shuffles but has more trouble going from a flat white to dark square than she does with actual stairs. She still constantly tells me I'm handsome and that she loves me and occasionally actually thanks me where it may be meant as said. I see no real difference except that she is more articulate and while she hasn't gained any skills back - she does seem less deeply confused.
I don't know what happens to me afterwards. I do know that I can do anything and that the real trick will be to go out there and actually do something.
I'm learning a lot about life. Tons. I'm learning not to judge while still being angry. I'm learning the limits that I can endure which makes me smile because the most honest people around me have said they didn't know I had this in me. Yah, me too. I smile at all the praise too which I get everywhere I go. The real truth is that there are only two choices. Stick it out or take the money and run. Not great choices.
Mostly I'm learning about myself. To see the real me more clearly. To try to face taking the random elements I have become and take that somewhere new. AHHH! Run away! No, no. See, I take me with me. It's a cinch bet that I can't avoid me. Know thyself. Yah, thanks, that's so helpful.
My voice inside I call the man in the lawchair always knows.
"This is really happening. Deal with it or get swallowed up." Right. Got it. Thanks so much.
Well said Wolf!!!!! People are always saying how good I am with DH and what a "saint" I am for putting up with everything. But there a choices we have to make and this the the one I made. We do what we gotta do!!!
Marsh, the chimp is fine as long as he doesn't snore. JeaneteB - a sleep number bed is a wonderful invention. It is basically an air mattress that you can set to any firmness while you are in it. It has a remote which governs each half of the bed so I can have and nice firm bed and he can have a softer side. Marsh - do you think my roomie would be able to work the remote?
I'd like to book a spot on your ark, Marsh, but it's so dry in Texas right now that I think the first few days I will just float alongside if you don't mind.
Thanks, Wolf. I'm working on "growing up" or dealing with all of this; I've concluded I'm a very slow learner. Your description of finding bits, pieces, things, whatever here and there and everywhere fits our household. Hiding paper towels, etc., locking fridge, pantry and every door that contains something of interest to hb (that would be every room). Down side: I hide the delicious choc cake I've made, forget about it until I come across a hard-as-rock cake in the guest room. Have to admit some days I wish he couldn't walk because he's constantly on the go getting into things. Well, it's time to clean the carpet on basement steps he used as his personal urinal:(
What is it about paper that seems to occupy such a big part of our loved one's lives. I got up this morning to toilet paper hanging on the hook where the hand towel usually is. Half a roll of paper is rolled up on the sink. The toilet paper has been taken off the roll and the holder is covered in it. Paper towels are folded all over the house as is kleenex and napkins. He never uses the paper but will tell me that it is for me (or guests) to use! What does everyone do with it then?
My DH has started using toilet paper for cleaning everything again. He stopped for a while, but unfortunately he’s back at it. I keep washcloths in plain sight in the bathrooms & I told him to use them (silly me!). He uses table napkins in abundance too, but I buy them at the dollar store so they are cheap, but toilet paper isn’t cheap & I don’t like the cheap stuff!
Another rainy day in KY - but no tornadoes. I feel so sad for the people of Joplin and other areas that have been hit hard this spring.
Got my check-up yesterday. Doctor said my labs were better than his! LOL Got an A in everything! I'm good to go! My PCP is so nice and caring. He told me if I need to scream, yell, cuss or pray to call him - day or night. He gets it - his Mother had ALZ.
Today is DH birthday, I am making him a cake and we are going out to eat tomorrow. He got a call from his former secretary this morning and she wished him a very happy birthday. What a nice way to start the birthday weekend!
Vickie, So happy that your check-up went well. Always a mood lifter :-) It is raining AGAIN today but we are blessed not to have had the weather the midwest is getting. Blue, Glad your DH's day is going well. Hope the weekend goes well.
This has been a horrible month for so many..won't be long now before we can sing"" JUNE IS BUSTIN OUT ALL OVER.."
weather here today and yesterday has been gorgeous but so bad in so many places these past couple of weeks with tornadoes and floods. So much destruction and sadness. And this, the Merry Month of May....sigh.
A busy day today when most people coming for the long weekend check in. From what I saw go by there are still over 50 to check in so I should busy tonight.
People are parked across from us that have 4 little dachsunds. Hb was saying one is the same coloring as the dog we use to have but could not remember her name. We had her for 16 years and she died 3 years ago. This even though we talk about her often when we see other dogs. Hope this is a fluke cause I am not ready for his to loose ground. I do notice he wants to go walk all the time which I am afraid one day he will be a 'runner' like his dad and sister. Positive - he is doing good remembering the names of the other workampers. In the past he was always in the forefront and I worked in the background so was known as his wife. Guess what: I still him. People come in that he has been chatting with in the park and say: you are Charlotte, Art's wife! Oh well. One day he won't be around for that to happen.
Weather is partly sunny with winds today gusting to 35mph. Tomorrow they are suppose to change to light. That will be good.
Been a busy week here. My dad had knee replacement surgery last Friday and is now in rehab. My mom doesn't drive so I've been going back and forth between my house, her's and the hospital plus taking care of my husband. Thank goodness for day care so I didn't have to take him with everytime I went to the hospital. He couldn't understand why he wasn't supposed to use the bathroom in the patients' room and since he does have OCD behavior regarding bathrooms, I spent a lot of time taking him to the one in the hall. Then we had some plumbing problems and had to have our main sewer line hydro-jetted today due to tree roots.
Next Wednesday my goddaughter graduates from high school and since my dad (her grandfather) can't go she asked me to come. They only get six tickets for each family. I asked my husband's brother to watch him for me so I could go and he agreed to do it immediately. I'm the one who is nervous about leaving him at his brother's home. I feel like I'm leaving my baby for the first time with a sitter. Crazy...
Our weekend plans are kaput..Our best man and his wife were going to come for the weekend but he was not feeling well..saw his cardiologist and everything checked out ok but they are doing a stress test next Tuesday so they can't come. In a way I am kind of glad as I have so much to do and the visit was one of very short notice..so I can take a deep breath...
The Strawberry Festival is this weekend and the town will be full of out of towners. So I plan to just keep a low profile and putter around home.
Thanks for the Memorial Day picnic plans. It has been the only thing keeping me sane. DH has really gone down hill this weekend. Is not making any sense when he talks and cannot get himself dressed or undressed unless I do everything. Took him 45 minutes to take his shoes off last night. They are velcro and he kept taking them off and putting them on the entire time! I was ready to scream. Now I know I just have to take them off myself and do everything else. But it is the nonsensical babbling that is driving me crazy. I guess this downturn was so sudden. I didn't even get him up for church this morning as he was actually sleeping in. Waited until he woke up himself about 9:15. I know I will get used to this stage like all the others but he is also very contrary as well. Enjoying "planning" for the Memorial Day "get together". Thank YOU!!!!
phil4:13 My DH goes to bed fully dressed, but I do convince him to take his shoes off. Then during the night he wakes up & puts his shoes on......then takes them off & puts another pair on.......then takes them off & on & on.
My hb does same re shoes: off and on; same w/socks. Isn't fussy about wearing matching shoes, either, or whether he has 2 socks on one foot or none on one or either. That's okay when we're home, but when we leave the house I try to ensure he's "matched," face is clean and hair combed--just like toddler care.
Oh, back to "good bye April showers:" I hope good bye May showers. Yesterday family/friends cookout. We grilled and ate under a shed, but games on the lawn were limited because of rain. Young ones played volleyball in the rain. Toddler great-grandson loved the rain and mud - barefoot boy. This afternoon had more severe rainstorms. Getting a bit depressing. We'll be having an infestation of humongous slugs as in the PNW.
It is SO windy in Kansas that it is hard to go outside. Was hot today...one town had a record of 106. Supposed to be even more windy tomorrow. We need rain really badly here. Looking forward to June but looks like summer is going to hit us hard and fast.
Beautiful day - sunshine, clouds, and tonight we had a thunderstorm. Camped next to us are 4 women whose husband's go one way and they come here for some wine drinking. Well, they were walking in town when the thunderstorm hit so were soaked to the skin when they got back to their tents. They went across the road into the motorhome there to get warmed up/dried off. They have finally quieted down. It is much more enjoyable when the park is full like this weekend than when it is only half full.
It is to be 91 here today and 92 tomorrow! Not ready for this heat nor am I ready to hook up the a/c yet since the pollen is still falling. To cool off later in the week but it is hard to get anything done when you wilt from doing the least little thing.
ElaineH - I have solved the problem (for now) of DH putting his shoes and clothes on and off during the night. When he does take them off I move them to another room. The shoes go in the closet out of sight. It has helped. It is just getting him to take them off to begin with. Now if I could just get him to stop stuff his depends with everything that is handy. $7 fell out of them last night.....better than the alternative I guess.
phil - good idea, however if I did that he would just wake me up & tell me that he needs his shoes & then he wouldn't stop until I got them for him (been there done that!) My DH doesn't need depends - YET - but he stuffs everything in his pockets. He has these huge commemorative coins that belong in a frame. Well he took them out of the frame & keeps them in his pockets. It adds about 5 pounds to him. Dontcha love it!
Thunder storm and power outage last night, but now sunny and getting warm.
I will be among the missing for the next week or more. #1. My computer got a major virus and I have to take it to a repair shop tomorrow. Don't know when I will get it back. I'm using my sister's computer now. #2. I am leaving on Thursday for Chicago for our daughter's Retirement Party. I can't believe I'm old enough to have a daughter retire, even if she is 55. I have hired 3 women to take care of my wife while I'm gone. I hope it works. I haven't tried this previously. I get back to Maine Monday afternoon.
It was windy here too on the Central Coast ( although we know we are all in FLA at the picnic) and the day before I had such an allergy attack ( I was late getting started for the picnic). I stayed in yesterday. It is windy again today, sun out and it is flat out chilly..could see your breath in the air this morning at 7. We only have one more day of May and they it gives way to June which we hope will be bustin' out all over with good weather and a let up in these terrible storms..