I agree with everything you say but I think we either state or ask about stages so that we have a general idea of where ours, or other spouses are in their path with ALZ. It's easier for me to identify with someone whose spouse is a Stage 6 vs. a Stage 2 or 7. Even if there are a lot of differences in a 6 (way to broad of a spectrum) at least it's a starting point.
I couldn't even begin to identify what stage Tom is in. Some days he is right on the money and some days I hate to even leave him in aa room alone. It even varies to the extremes from hour to hour. He's never been mean or hateful (except for the first year after the neuro testing) and I hope he never gets to that stage.
The first time I read the stages I laughed out loud. Stage 1 is: "No impairment (normal function) The person does not experience any memory problems. An interview with a medical professional does not show any evidence of symptoms." So everyone has Alzheimer's, some of us are just stage 1 :)
I agree with Emily, wanting to identify the stage has to do with trying to figure out how long until... ...until he loses his job... ...until I need to hire help... ...until I need to place him...
Its great in theory to just live with where you are today, but realistically you have to do lots of adjusting that takes forethought and planning.
As you so often do, Joan, you again nailed yet another topic. Since not all AD patients experience all AD symptoms usually found in the AD 'stages' commonly listed, at best the stages are guideposts. Each of us married to an AD spouse will be dealing with most, but not necessarily all, of the symptoms usually associated with the most common 3-stage or 7-stage listings ... at least until the our spouses are near the very end of their struggles with this terminal disease. If it provides comfort to some to know if their spouses are at this particular stage or that particular stage, fine. But just like babies progress through certain milestones differently, all of us must remember one simple caveat about our spouses: If you know one person with AD, then you know one person with AD!
I use Early, Middle and End stages. He is still in the early stages because he is high functioning - his memory is his biggest problem so if I had to sub-stage him I would say the later part of Early.
I do agree I think in our desire to label (our world is like this not just us) we seek to get more precise. I know we all would like a definitely timeline that you can get with other diseases, but that is not possible.
we don't know the cause we don't know the cure we don't know the treatment we don't know how rapidly it will progress we don't know if we will be able to survive it
So, at least we know the stages. And, if your spouse's disease progresses in the most common pattern, it gives you a general idea of what is coming next.
briegull, I certainly agree with you. You think that because your LO is in late middle stage that it won't be long now........10 years later they are still in late stage 6 but with a few different symptoms!