I had to put my husband in assisted living last week. It was to be for ten days to see if they could get his meds adjusted so that he would get his sleeping hours straightened out. Since then, however, I know that he has been pretty hard to deal with at times, and they are keeping information from me. Is that normal?
I think we need a little more information in order to answer your question. Why do you think they are keeping things from you, and what is it you think they are keeping from you?
Unfortunately, it is up to us to be fierce advocates for our spouses. My husband is still at home, but my father is in the ALF next door to me, so I am learning about "care management". I wrote a very informative blog about care management in facilities - it may help you - http://www.thealzheimerspouse.com/Primeroncaregivermeetings.htm
Jeannie, I agree with Joan, before I could try to help I would need to know more information. Having said that, I will say that like Nora, I made it CRYSTAL clear that I am to be notified about anything and everything!! There is no need to keep ANYTHING from the spouse.
Jeannie--it may not be deliberate, they just may be poor communiators. My husband was recently in a care facility for a medication adjustment, and it took me about 10 days to get to the bottom of why they were dealing with bladder issues when the intent of the stay was to get his meds regulated (so he would be more cooperative with care and less agitated). I basically kept asking questions by phone, email and in person until I finally reached the right individual who gave me an explanation that made sense. I think finding the right source of information and developing a relationship with that person may be key to keeping informed.