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    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011
     
    So, my husband suddenly takes a whole weeks work the serequel last night.........I know, I should have been watching him those 5 seconds I wasn't, but he tricked me. Thank goodness it was a low dose and everything is fine, no thanks to the on call doctor who was on vacation! Did talk to a pharmacist, a teaching hospital and the ER..... Nice to know there is help when you need it! ARGH!

    Now we have 4 inches of water in the family room. It is great that it is above freezing today, but we still have far too much snow to have it melt this fast. Trying as hard as I can to get the water out, but it keeps coming in.........Kinda like this monster of a disease.

    Today I give up. I just don't know what to do. I'm so tired of people saying there must be some help out there. After 4 years, you'd think they'd show up.

    Just venting.....

    Thanks,
    Ann
  1.  
    Ann, where do you live. Are you being flooded by outside flood waters???? (vs: broken pipes)
    Doncha wish we could simply run away from home like we might have planned when we were young?? I'm so sorry.

    IF it IS flood waters, can you evacuate? I'm worried about you.
    NancyB*
    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011
     
    No, Nancy, we are not in a flood zone. We have just had too much snow this year and if it goes above freezing the water starts coming in. I will have to wait until summer to find the location of the crack in the foundation. Hey, they rhymes! We are located in a mountain area, so it would be unlikely we would need to evacuate. The water will just destroy the items in the 2 lower levels. Guess I could hope for more snow?

    Thanks for caring.
    • CommentAuthorAdmin
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011
     
    Oh Ann, I'm so sorry you are having such a rough time. Vent away. That's what we're here for.

    Will a sump pump help? When I lived in New England, my house sat atop a huge yard that had a downward slant, so I never had water inside no matter how much it snowed, but I know lots of people who did, and the sump pump worked well.

    Our spouses are like little children - can't take your eyes off of them for a second, only now we're a whole lot older, slower, and more tired, than when our children were toddlers.

    joang
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011
     
    I would call your fire department and see if they have sump pumps you can borrow. I know they usually have them. If not go to Home Depot and buy one. Usually you can connect a hose up to them which you could run out a window/door. but a sump pump seems to be the option right now.
    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011
     
    You are right about living in New England....we have to put the water up and out. I have tried to find a someone who has a pump, but with no luck. We don't have the money to purchase one anyway.........nothing like a Home Depot around here. I've asked my son to come home to help, but he can't be bothered.

    Right now I'm just trying to soak it up with anything I can find..........put the washer on spin and start all over again.......

    I've just given up on everything.
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011 edited
     
    Ann i looked up automatic submersible sump pump on home depot they have some for 127dol and free shipping. sounds like a decent investment to get that water out of your family room. there are several to chose from in that range. so sorry for all you are going thru -hang in there!
    divvi
    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011
     
    Thanks for looking that up, divvi. It would be a good investment, but I just don't have the money. Last week we ate potatoes to pay for my husband's meds.........As hard as I've tried for these 4 years, enough is enough....The rope doesn't hold anymore...
  2.  
    AnnMW I know it doesn't help-but I am so sorry.
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeMar 18th 2011
     
    Ann are you by chance on medicaide? if you cant afford your medicines the drug companies that make your needed meds will help you get them free of charge or at minimum a very reduced rate. and in the meantime you can ask your dr for FREE samples of all his meds to tide you over. most drs have samples packs or they can get you some. i know its hard -
    do you have neighbor that can help you with the water cleanup? i think the idea of calling your local fire dept and asking for help may be a good idea.
    divvi
  3.  
    Ann, you don't have time to "give up". You have come this far and with the encouragement from others posting here you can continue forward "one step at a time". It won't be easy --nothing worthwhile is. Good advice about the fire department and prescriptions. There is a lot of help out there for people with limited funds. Sometimes we just have to "dig". Your Department of Health or some other County Agencies should be able to steer you in the right direction. Call your state Alzheimer's Association. In our area I was offered free or almost free "sitting and entertaining dh" for so many hours a week. Here, the Doctor's mostly don't have free samples like they used to but I bet they can steer you to a Agency who can. I know and understand your being overwhelmed. Most of us have been overwhelmed. But, I promise you - Things will get better. Take care...
  4.  
    If you have flood insurance, they will cover water removal and clean up. (oops, forgot about the $$ deductible).. there has to be a way....I'll keep thinking. I agree it is worth a call to the fire department and just explain that your husband has alzheimer's and you're "stuck" and could they help. I have heard of firemen coming out to help in situations like yours "off duty". They have big hearts.
    n.
    • CommentAuthorOcallie36
    • CommentTimeMar 19th 2011
     
    Ann
    I'm sorry you have it so rough. Can you call the Fire Dept in your town? Ours will come to pump out homes.
    As for meds, call the company that makes it. they can give you free or cheaper meds. Just a thought.
    I hope things start to improve. If you were near by, I would try to help. Just continue to vent. It's sometimes our only relief.
    Carol
  5.  
    Even if the fire dept can't help they may know of someone who can. A youth group from a church or a scout troop may be able to help you clean. No one knows you need help if you don't tell them. Ask, you never know who will come to your aid. I am praying hard for you today Ann. I am so sorry you are having to go through this.
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeMar 19th 2011
     
    Ann, google free medicine and you will find places to apply for them. We have a friend we met while working in NH that could not afford her psych meds. She applied and was approved.
    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMar 19th 2011
     
    Thank you everyone. Just having a really difficult time......nothing different from everyone else on this board. My husband does get SSD, but isn't eligible for medicaid. My husband was a pharmacist and we can't pay for medication. Great, huh?

    We aren't in a flood zone so we don't have flood insurance. I have to think there is a crack in the foundation because this is the first time we have had trouble with water in this area of the house. With such a snowy winter, everyone is having the same problem. Just seems to be a larger problem when you are alone.

    More later.........

    Thanks so much!
  6.  
    Ann-everything is harder when you are alone.
    • CommentAuthorcarosi*
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2011
     
    AnnMW1157--UInless your husband only started receiving SSD recently and is satill in the initial waiting period, he should hve Medicare and Part D to deal with med costs. Check it out as well as the programs the companiesoffer for help. You may have to cobble a combination together, but this should not be such a problem for you.
    •  
      CommentAuthordeb112958
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2011 edited
     
    AnnMW1157,

    My husband just got Medicare in 12/2010. I have signed him up for a supplement through Blue Cross and Part D through AARP. His meds vary from $7 for generics, $42 for tier 2 drugs (aricept and namenda) and $75 for tier 3 drugs (seroquel). I am in the process of trying to get his meds transferred over to the VA to help with the costs as his meds will send us into the dreaded donut hole.

    If your husband is a vet, I would check into the VA for help with meds.
  7.  
    Ann....do you have a shop vac?? that works well to vacuum the water...ya can get one at a walmart for under $50....just a thought...
    When I lived in NH, I had the same problem...a foundation crack, and with the snow melting, the ground frozen, well it did flood my basement....
    Lost the carpeting, and anything that was not raised up off the floor...and I did try to patch the crack from the inside, but that did not work (I used hydraulic portland cement...)...I had to wait until sping when the ground thawed,
    then dug down, patched the crack and sealed it with tar ...I do not recommend that you try this yourself...
    Sorry to hear about your difficulties...This disease does not quit until you are broke, half dead, totally exhausted, and devasted.
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2011
     
    The VA is a very good place to get meds. It cost us $8 a month for all medications. It is the only medical my hb has but I need to look into medicare since it has been over 2 years. With traveling there may not be a VA nearby although in emergency they will pay for care.
  8.  
    Shop Vacs (very large ones) can also be rented by the day for a very low cost...from Home Depot, Lowe's and equipment rental centers.

    If your husband is on SSDI..he is eligible for medical care. You must call someone and get more information. We spent hours and hours on the telephone. They strongly believe in "IF THEY DON"T ASK..WE WON'T HAVE TO VOLUNTEER INFORMATION!!"

    I believe you are so depressed you cannot muster up the energy right now to be proactive in these matters. Do you have a friend or relative that can help you research options. They ARE there.. You don't have to stand in ankle deep water and do without medication in this day and age. I wish I could be there to help you bail out of this situation (in more ways than one.)
    Nancy B*
    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMar 21st 2011
     
    Again, thanks to every one of you for your suggestions.

    Nancy.....you've guessed it.....I'm just too depressed at this point to even try anymore....Everything has happened at once, it seems,including my parents' death. We have one son, who is struggling between school and home. The very few relatives we have left don't care to stay in touch.

    I am reading your suggestions and will respond.

    Again, thank you.
  9.  
    Ann, I feel your pain. Just too much to even comprehend, but you are a strong woman and you can do it. I have 2 grandchildren in College and I can relate to your situation there. However, good news, he WILL come through this phase in his life and return to be a good supportive son. My granddaughter was all about SELF until the past year - her Senior year and the change in her has been remarkable. She has been "reborn". We are delighted. Grandson is finishing his second year and is all about SELF. He rarely talks to his Mom or anyone else in the family. My daughter is sooo stressed about his choice of friends and "life choices". However, he was in this weekend and I noticed a " bit of thinking about his cousin, who starts at the same College in the fall. He actually talked with him a bit. So, don't give up on your son. Love him and "kill him with kindness". I have found that is the best way to deal with rude people. So, take a deep breath, pull up your big girl pants, and forge ahead. I believe in you.
    • CommentAuthorAnnMW1157*
    • CommentTimeMar 21st 2011
     
    No, I wouldn't give up on my son.........He's the only one who has helped, but it is so difficult for him to see his father this way. They have always been close. He's just feeling the pressure of the college years as well......
    • CommentAuthorterry*
    • CommentTimeMar 22nd 2011
     
    Hello Ann, wish I could help. I'll be thinking about you. I certainly relate to everything piling on at once and also family that isn't there like you'd expect. And also how depression affects our thinking. Today was a low depression day for me and I'm glad I didn't make any permanent decisions. I hope your tomorrow is better.
    • CommentAuthorElaineH
    • CommentTimeMar 29th 2011
     
    Just venting……perfect topic cuz that’s what I’m going to do. DH woke up in a very bad mood. Very sarcastic, didn’t want to take a shower or change clothes (he sleeps in the clothes he wears during the day, I switch them out when he takes a shower). He asked what we were going to do today & I mistakenly told him we were taking the van to get the oil changed. Well I don’t know what he thought that meant, but he got all ugly & said some derogatory things about mechanics. So I decided that it might be a good idea to cancel the oil change & try to get it done when I have a few hours by myself (which isn’t very often). By this time I am getting so frustrated, but I convinced him to take a shower. While he is in the shower I call & cancel the oil change & decide that maybe the best thing is to just stay home. Aside from getting frustrated I can feel myself getting depressed & that makes me not want to do anything. So when he gets out of the shower he must have left Mr. Ugly there, cuz Mr. Nice Guy came out. He was all sweet & nice. You could have pushed me over with a feather. So here I am angry & depressed & here he is all sweet & nice. I just can’t turn my emotions on & off like that. Now he is sitting across the room from me & he is starting to get frustrated & it’s because he can’t understand why I’m not all happy & talkative. I’m trying to do the best I can, but some days it just doesn’t seem to be enough.
    • CommentAuthorCharlotte
    • CommentTimeMar 29th 2011
     
    ElaineH - we have all been there to one degree or another. It is depressing at times to know we can't forget like they can.
    • CommentAuthorterry*
    • CommentTimeMar 31st 2011
     
    Elaine, couldn't have said it better!!! And you made me laugh which I sorely need.