It's Lee. Here I am again trying to figure out what to do next. I'm just mentally and physically exhausted and feel like I'm always hitting a brick wall when it comes to communication with my husband (dementia). I get so impatient having to repeat my self 100 times a day. It's driving me crazy. He gets angry at me and I react to that which is not a good situation. Any advise from anyone? This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do and sometimes I don't know how much more I can take. I'm the only one caring for him and have no one to talk to. My family is non-existent. I'm it. NEED SOME ENCOURAGEMENT!!!
Lee, Is your husband still able to attend a Daycare? My husband is past the asking the same questions...what seemed like 500 times a day, so it does end. Funny, now I would like to answer some of those questions. However, getting back to the point. I found much relief when I started my husband in Daycare 3 times a week. Gave me a much needed break. Oh by the way, he didn't always like going, but he always went.
Communication with my wife is almost non-existant. Her "conversation" bears no resemblance to what we are doing or what I am talking about. SO, I generally make no effort at conversation. If she gets mad, which does happen occasionally, I just walk away. When I come back a few minutes later she has forgotten that she was mad and usually does what I want.
Also, I am concerned that you have no support. You need to find some way to get "respite". I take my wife to Adult Day Care three days a week from 9-2. This gives me time to exercise, shop, go to lunch with friends, etc. If you don't have day care available, try hiring someone to be with him while you go out. AND, come here often. We all understand what you are going through.
Lee O12 I feel your pain.Please know many of us feel the way you do.We never know what to expect from one minute to the next.This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.God help us all cope.
depending on where they are in stages and aggressiveness, i dont think it would make a whole lot of difference if you answered say one in 3 questions instead of every dang one?? i know i felt the same when i went thru this. nearly drives you nuts, the repetitions. i got to where it went in one ear and out the other and only answered when appropriate and not every single time. i dont think it registered when i did answer all of them at first anyway. it continued to repeat. nothing you can say will last very long at this stage. just pic/choose which you should answer and let the others slide. sounds harsh but we need to ignore some of it or you will go bonkers as sometimes this stage lasts a good while. if all else fails, redirection and pacifying their needs, then more meds may help to relieve the anxiety. as in both of you.. :)
Although I have no wise advice for you, since I am fighting this same aggravation on a daily basis, I have listed some of my blogs on this subject. If nothing else, it will let you know that you are not alone.
I can totally sympathize with your call. I have dealt with all of the above and finally placed him in an ALF. I miss him dearly and deal with that on a daily basis. Life is not good anymore. Deanna