I haven’t been on in a while because I have been spending every spare moment at the hospital with my father. My father’s heart stopped on Feb 2nd and he collapsed. The doctors said when he hit the floor it broke his hip and restarted his heart. I called 911 and he was rushed to the hospital where they were able to stabilize his heart enough to operate and place a pin and screw in his hip. He started having heart and lung problems the day after surgery. His heart would race up to 185 beats a minute and his lung would race to 85 or 90 breaths a minute. The doctors would give him something to slow his heart rate and then it would get too slow and they would have to take him off of it. His lung problem was caused by the lungs trying to get enough oxygen to the brain to make it work better. On February 18th he was awake and joking and being himself and my brother and I began to think there was a chance he would get better again. He told us that he would be out of there in two days and that when he was out of there he wanted us to make sure that we live life to the fullest possible. That evening he took a turn for the worst and the doctors told was it was time to make a decision about his care so they would know what to do if things required the placement of breathing tubes and other artificial means of maintaining life. They also explained that they had done all they could. There was no physical reason for his heart and lungs to be having all the problems they were having. They also explained they believed that the heart problem was neurologic and would require him to remain on medication to control it and be in a nursing home with tubes helping him breathe. They also said he would not be able to get out of bed for the remainder of his life. My Dad was very clear about what he wanted and didn’t want in an event like this and this was not what he wanted so on Sunday the 20th of February I gathered the family around and had the doctors remove everything, clean him up and let him go naturally (about 18 minutes). It’s hard to believe he is gone. I go outside in the morning and see cars driving and people going to work and they don’t even realize that he is gone. Doesn’t seem possible. We will not be playing our dobros together or building anything or going to lodge ever again. He was a veteran of WWII, Korea and Vietnam. He made sure Kathryn ate and took her meds every morning and ate lunch and watched over her when I was at work. She cried for three days and became sick when he passed. She is doing better now but we will have to deal with everything differently in the future now that it is just the two of us. He was home on leave when he saw a young lady walk out of a store across the street and told his buddy to stop for a minute because he needed to go introduce himself to his future wife. He walked across the street went up to the young lady and introduced himself and three months later they were married and were married for over 60 years and he loved her everyday of those 60 years. He never stopped loving her after my mother died in July of 2008. I think maybe now he is happy once more being with her. JimB
Sympathy to you and all your family. Try to find comfort in knowing you did everything possible for your dad's recovery and in the last,honored his wishes. He is at peace now.
Ahhhh Jim, I'm so sorry for the loss of your Dad/your friend/your partner in caregiving. I have the same relationship with my Mom. I can't imagine not having her. I hope that in time happy memories will fill your heart and replace the empty ache. Take comfort in knowing that you now have two special angels watching over you and Kathryn. Arms around, Susan*
Dear Jim, I'm so sorry for your loss. Yes, it's hard to see that the world goes on without our loved one. But we know that the world is a better place because of the lives they lived.
Jim, I am so sorry you won't be able to share more special moments with your father here, but you have all those wonderful memories to comfort you, and can look forawrd to seeing him again one day. Thank you for sharing your memories with us. I love the story of your parents first meeting - how romantic!
Thanks for taking the time to read about my Dad. It meant a lot to me that someone knows him a little more. He always told me and my brother that he felt his greatest responsibility in life was raising us and that we were the greatest gift he had ever been given. Even if one of us wasn’t a girl (he always wanted a daughter). My brother was closer to my mother and I was closer to my father. Everybody always said they had never seen a father and son so much alike. I guess it was true because we enjoyed so many of the same things together.
Thanks again for taking the time to read about him. It means a lot to me. He was and always will be my hero.
Jim I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your Dad. It warmed my heart to read about how he met your Mom and the deep love they had for one another. I hope you find comfort and peace knowing they are together again ((hugs))
Jim, I am so sorry to learn your Dad has passed on--a difficult loss made doubly so because the two of you were so close and he helped you Caregive your wife. Knowing he's now with your Mom is some comfort, and they'll be watching over you. The bonds of love may stretch but bonds like yours don't break. He's just leading the way and will one day greet your wife and you, when those times come. Until then, Peace be with you.