Well my DW can no longer put on her BRA and she is asking me to find something. Do they make a Velco bra? I guess I will have to go the to store. I must admit I am not wanting to discuss this with the sales clerk at the store. What has anyone else found?
moorsb i wouldnt worry about a bra at home then. if she needs to get out, maybe just a STRAPLESS soft one is easier for you to help her into? there are many soft forms of strapless these days. check her bra size from one of her regular ones and and you can then buy something easier for her at the dept stores. many lady sales persons are very helpful and you wont have any problem with them helping you. just tell them your problems and they can offer suggestions. divvi
The ones with the front she is unable to do it. I guess she wants to do it herself, but she can not and is having a hard time accepting that. The Sports Bra is an idea.
I agree with the sports bra recommendation. They just slip over your head, but they do have spandex or something like that so they are stretchy but tight. Target, Penny's, Sears all dept stores would carry them.
Bras that go over the head (sports) can be difficult especially if stretching arms is a problem. I think the soft strapless suggestion is a good one. Glad my hb is the one w/dementia because he absolutely would NOT be able to take care of me. Guys on here are award winners.
I gave up putting my wife's bra on several months ago. I have switched to something called, I think, a camesole (?sp). It's sort of like mens sleeveless under shirts. It works well and is easy to put on and take off. Some of the one's I have seen in catalogues are fairly long (below the waist), but I have 2 that come just to the waist.
Back in the 60's I wanted my wife to go bra-less, but she refused. Now, when it doesn't matter, she will do it.
We haven't worn a bra in over a year. My wife is quite average in size so some of the comfort issues about a bra don't apply. It's completely unnecessary. I put on thin summer tops that are soft and then some form of blouse or sweater over that. In the summer I have a few very thin covers (two are the sheer patterned covers women put over bathing suits) and slip that on over the summer top. If she doesn't want it on I don't worry about it.
Other than that I don't put on a single color top if we go shopping near the cold sections so as not to scare the children. Louder patterns hide the fact she is not wearing a bra.
In my mind it's a comfort issue and many of the sports bra lines deal well with that. Not so much infrastructure as containment with comfort. And no hooks and fiddling. Just slip on over the head like any other top.
Blouses with pockets work really well. Also a little powder under the breast will help keep the area more comfortable. I hate the pull over sports bras because it is hard for me to put one on with my tired old arms. Heck. it's a problem fastening any bra that I can't pull around to the front. Now, I know that is more than you really wanted to know about my problems. It's heck to get old but it beats the alternative.
moorsb, Camisoles can be good when the need is perhaps to be a bit more dressy. Because I have chaffing issues between the rim of the bra and my crutches, I generally wear a pull over knit top or a roomy sweatshirt. If it's colder weather or I'm going out, a sweater, Flannel Shirt or fleece jacket worn over the top helps mask the lack of a bra, if necessary. In the summer I choose colored T's coordinating with my loose fitting sundresses--can't stand the rubber of the crutch tops under bare arms either. Botton line in my book---Comfort's the key.
I would think there would be certain types of slightly more structured camisoles that could do the trick, if eliminating a bra altogether is undesirable. There is a little more shaping in the way of darts and seams and whatnot in the bodice portion, but it would still slip over the head easily without the tight elasticity of a sports bra.
Some of the A.N.A.brand camisoles at Penney's have a built-in bra, just sort of a shelf thing with elastic underneath to hold the breasts up. Very comfy and with a blouse over it really looks ok.
Check out KMart if there are any in your area.I found a chamisole type under shirt there with a slight cupping ,I'm allergic to latex and these gave me a little more support than a plain chamisole.They were really cheap and came ina few colors plus white and black.Very comfortable
Thanks for all of your input. Now I will need to get up the nerve to talk to a sales person about the situation. I noticed they do not have guys in that department.
At 1st I would put a sports bra on my DW, but it didn't take long before I had problems getting her arms and head through it. I have since gone to just wearing any type of cotton undershirt. She really likes the sleaveless t-shirts (some would call them wife beaters). I then put a more appropriate dress shirt over it.
In regards to talking to a clerk. Yes it is embarassing. About a year ago my DW insisted we go shopping for a bra and that she needed to try it on. You should have seen the look the clerk at WalMart gave me when I went into the dressing room with her. LOL.
Later on, I would just buy the same size, not ask anyone and use the self checkout lane.
I was not planning on taking her with me as I am sure she would disagree. I know that she is a 34C and that should be all I need. I might buy a couple to see what she can use.
When I needed to purchase bras and other items, I’ve found the sale ladies to be very understanding and helpful and I didn't feel embarrassed at all. I also did not take her with me.
I just caught up with this post, but I would like to add my two cents worth in favor of the camisoles - with 'built in cups". They do not mash the boobs..and they are very comfortable. Pretty too. You can 'Google" camisoles/bras on line and find all you need to find in all prices.
They do make sports bras that hook in the front or back. I go for bra-less - hate wearing those things. Not only knowing the size but take a tape measure with you unless you buy name brand like playtex. I found a bra I liked, went to buy another one - found the same size but they were 3 inches shorter in length/around. Same style number, same size but the one I liked was made in Indonesia, the other two were made in China and Phillipines.
My aunt had suffered a double mastectomy back in the 80s. She found some soft cotton, I think they were Jockey brand, camisole tops. They were soft and no one noticed..course she was not kind of flat but no one knew. These tops stayed tucked in and did not ride up or bind. They washed up easily and as I recall had just a tiny bit of stretch but were not baggy. If she had to wear a slip she used half slips. With my mom who had AD, at some point I think the bras went the way of most of her clothes. Unless she was going out, she wore little sweat suit combos and sneakers..the sneakers helped with her walking a little but the little sweat suits kept her warm, it was easier for the toilet times, kept her warm as she would feel cold and no one knew she was not wearing that Chinese Sling Shot, as my DH used to call this contraption, and my mom was about a size 36C.
Link to a company called Silvert's, which sells adaptive clothing, including this cotton undergarment: http://www.silverts.com/show.cfm/product/18450-comfortable-support-bra-vest
Moosb...my only solution was to join the ban the bra protesters and burn all of them. I find that it only adds to the confusion and difficulty of getting dressed. I am happy if she can get a pair of pants and a blouse on....Bras are no longer necessary, and modesty is now the issue.... She used to keep it clasped, and would put it on like she was putting on a pair of pants......but, she often had it upside down, inside out, and tied in knots, so I do not even mention them anymore....It was funny when she attempted to put it over her blouse...To save some sanity, I deemed bras as unnecessary to maintain her sanity.
My mother and others used to love "Cuddleduds"...They are soft and warm and come in several colors. Most stores carry them and I believe you can order online as well.
Remember - it was a man that came up with the idea of bras. Women stopped wearing corsets and men thought they needed something to put their breast in.