Jeanette,

I cannot find ElaineK. Where did she post?

Thank you.

joang

Welcome ElaineK...you have found a place of comfort, understanding and support. Come back as often as you can.

Thank you for welcoming me -- I apologize for not introducing myself before posting.

I am caregiver for my husband, who will be 61 this week, and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's type dementia during 2010. The journey to get the diagnosis was a long one and there are days when I do wonder if it's accurate. But I am learning that a person can fluctuate within the stages and I think that is what I find so difficult.

I first noticed that something was amiss with my husband in 2008 when he did our income taxes. He has always worked with numbers as he is (or was) an architect and structural engineer. After he worked on our taxes and asked me to sign them, I realized that he had omitted some credits and deductions and that he actually had even copied figures from the preceding years' forms. I ended up doing the taxes myself and kept questioning him about the errors, but he couldn't explain -- just told me he was tired.

I initially thought that stress was the reason he was having memory problems -- not getting back to clients (he was self-employed), not completing jobs, or billing them twice. I also began to see problems in our marriage -- he seemed somewhat diminished and distant from me. I wanted to go to counseling but he refused.

2010 really was the year to get to the bottom of the problem -- my DH collapsed on Christmas Eve 2009 during our annual family gathering and he was taken by paramedics to the hospital. A CT scan indicated no tumors, but moderate generalized brain atrophy. I have to say I was actually thankful that he collapsed, because getting him to a doctor was next to impossible. He actually has collapsed two more times during this past year, the most recent on Dec. 1. I won't go into great detail, but each collapse was preceded by driving and I believe getting lost (since he can't seem to tell us the details).

He does see a great young neurologist who treats him with a great deal of respect and as one professional to another. He is currently on Aricept and Namenda -- I think the Namenda has been the most beneficial. I have already gone through the whole Social Security disability process and he was approved in December -- what a great Christmas gift that was!! He also is receiving private disability through a policy I made him get about 15 years ago -- I'm glad I insisted on that -- it's really helping. I was working, but lost my job in July. I'd like to get back to work (mainly for my own mental health -- need the companionship), but have been hesitant since his collapse in December. He was very disoriented during that hospitalization, although he seems back to his old self (whatever that is these days). He's not supposed to drive anymore, so I'm his transportation. I am thinking that maybe adult day care might be the next step. He spends his days watching TV -- all the old shows --doesn't really like anything current. He does still play saxophone in a community band and I take him to rehearsals.

His short term memory is not good, although sometimes he does remember, and I've seen some improvement with that since the Namenda. I think he's in Stage 4, but sometimes he seems okay and then during that hospitalization I thought he was getting worse. He still does all his own bathing, dressing, sleeps okay, but does need medication reminders -- he calls it his "poison" but he does take it. He's not interested at all in how we're surviving financially -- never asks, but certainly doesn't even acknowledge that he's getting disability payments.

I would have plenty more to tell -- but don't want to relate our life story. I do like coming to this site -- it's been very helpful, especially when he's having days that seem normal, and then I feel confused about the diagnosis.

Thanks again for welcoming me -- I'll certainly be back.