Are there any other artists in our group? I now find myself unable to create anything new and wonder if I'm alone in this. I have the time, but the spark is gone.
I hope this follows the thought of this thread. There are things that I need to get done around the house, I don’t have the energy. There are e-mails I should answer; I don’t have the time or energy. I haven’t even taken down our artificial Christmas tree. I think this disease saps our energy, ambition, time & whatever else you can think of.
I'm not an artist, but I find that my particular block in pursuing things I care about is that I can't bear to commit to something when I might be interrupted or have to change my plans because of my husband's need. I like to think that I might be able to change that and learn to work in the time available. I wrote something about other professional issues for my professional society here: http://www.hssonline.org/publications/Newsletter2011/January-elder-care.html
Just the opposite for me. In October, I took up knitting again after over 20 years. Once I got the hang of it again (It's like riding a bike, I guess - you never forget after a few wobbly starts), I rediscovered my artistic side. I have been experimenting with different yarn combinations, different stitches - I am loviing it, and it is better than a pill for relaxation.
Brooke.....I am a sculptor. I had enjoyed a bit of acclaim for several years. When AD came along, seems like I took a downward spiral, disappearing from exhibitiions (and therefore from my collector's eyes, publications, etc.). Then, I had another riding accident and have a permanent injury to my dominant arm/hand. Depression kept spiraling, even after John was placed in a nursing home and passed away. You'd think that it would have been then that I EMERSED myself in my studio work. Nope. It just won't come. At a loss as to what I'm supposed to do now, I find myself enrolled in college full-time. Now, I have NO TIME for where I want to be/ what I want to be doing...AT ALL. Folks tell me that I should "just make a point to set aside an hour or two here and there"...an artist knows that's bull-_hit. This creative process is NOT AT ALL like picking up some crochet or knitting work!!!! It takes me an hour or two to get in the "zone", then I work at it 10-12 hours at a time. Then, hate to leave the studio. I don't know what the solution is. If you find the answer, share it with me, please. For me, I don't think it has that much to do with "depression". Or, maybe it does, because of the medication. I DO know I was a LOT more creative and successful (not to mention MOTIVATED) when I was NOT on meds, but a lot of "other" stuff was on-board for pain, etc. I REALLY JUST WANT TO SCULPT.
blue, I used to do a LOT of machine embroidery on T-shirts, sweatshirts, make placemats and lots of other items. For the past 3 years the only things I have made are Baptismal hankies for my church and it is an effort to get started on them!
I think down periods do sap creative, artistic energy often. I make myself work on my book, but it's slow and a bit like squeezing the last fraction of toothpaste from an empty tube.
But I'll agree with Pam that it's partly a problem of distraction and difficulty focusing. I am so singularly responsible for this one other person (not to mention the needs of my young adults,) that I'm feeling very ADD these days. Sometime your art or creativity requires going to a mentally-immersed zone that doesn't feel safe to go to when you know you're going to be yanked out of it at any moment.
As I'm reading this, I know full well I'm procrastinating on getting down to the editing of a book I need to work on. Definitely more ADD in the last few years!! Difficulty focussing.
I am not artistic but I find I cannot even concentrate long enough to get interested in reading......and I love to read. I think it would be the same for any endeavor...if you are going to be pulled away at any minute it is sort of like "what's the use!".
I agree with pamsc, I don't commit any more as it really bothers me getting interrupted. Last night, while cooking dinner, DH kept telling me about this and that on TV and became quite upset that I was not paying him and the TV attention. A boat show ad that has been on for two weeks came on three times during this time period. If I didn't "come running" for each ad, I was in trouble. I love to sew and have not done so in years. I need to concentrate on my projects and have no concentration time available.
I like photography..yesterday I was thinking I should just pack up my cameras ( except for one), all the lenses and stow them since I have no time for this and you can only take so many photos of your back yard, cat and DH...frustrating.
i also agree the constant interruptions influence the lack of initiative to start something. knowing it may have to be put on hold depends on how the day unfolds. lack of concentration, lack of GUNG (getup and go:) and general inablility to feel our own needs overpower the caregiving role.
I paint in oils. Just finished the harbor in county cork Ireland and am now starting a beagle which is the loved dog of the friend who has helped me all these last years. Carlos Santana has one of my paintings (beam).
The truth is that I consider this an extremely important topic because it is a path for us and as Joan is exploring if we put our souls into an aspect of the arts we find things out about ourselves.
No one knows what they can do. All can learn to play the piano. Some will be shocked that they have a talent in playing. Some of the best players in the world have never been heard from because they never sat down at one yet they had natural talent. All can learn to play. Some will find they can play well. Most will never give themselves the chance or will reinforce their concept if it's not brilliant immediately and walk away.
Ninety eight percent of those that read that sentence read it close minded sure it didn't apply to them and skipped over the implication. That's such a shame because almost everybody has a talent in something. I know people that gave up painting because they tripped over pottery and found themselves. One now sells the furniture they lovingly make because thank god they picked up some wood and gave it a go one day and kept at it.
Joan may or may not have 'heard' that someone is already interested in what she is exploring. Not to focus on Joan; but, that is how these things tend to be. My DW's favorite shawl was made by someone who tried this for a while and didn't think she was doing well. Except it's one of the things I will keep because she loved it. We are so self defeating.
I have no use for either the term 'artist' or the term 'hobby'. Human predilection to stuff things into channels is an outrageous deceit which is actually defence mechanism. I do not wish to understand this thing so I label it. Having labelled it, I have defined it. No. You have dispensed with it to protect yourself from love and involvment.
Did you know that reading is art? All readers form the worlds themselves in their own minds. Good writers trigger fertile ground for that; but, the scene you see is the scene you created. Words are ink in rows on paper and all the rest is done by the reader. That is art. I have so many times heard people fawn over my paintings saying they have no talent while telling me about the thing they just read and why it is good. They are in the comfort of their 'channels' and most don't actually want to be pulled out. That doesn't change that the paltry words forming the book "Driving Miss Daisy" for example are thin gruel compared to what the mind that read the book created.
I am also uninspired right now. I don't have an attitude that comes to things because I am happy or willing and so scan for inspiration as has been the case for so long. I am now working. I don't feel like painting from joy. The truth is I hate what my life is. So I'm working. And this last canvas is clearly my best. I don't care. My ego can't be fed by the pandering caused by creating a thing that has cache. This is exactly the same as not reading a book so you can tell others you read it - but reading the book in and of itself. I don't paint because I'm desperate for legacy and in my mind seeking status because of it is self agrandizement. I can Walter Mitty that without all the work.
Yet right here is the nub. We do not allow ourselves to truly explore because we are self effacing for one thing but more functionally here - we have already discounted ourselves out of these potentials while we have a conceit that we have not. It would be better that 'art' did not entail status but the opposite. A vast lot of people would then be finding and using their innate talents.
Some reading this could make fine furniture or beautiful cross stitch or find mechanical skill. One woman I know worked at acrylic painting of real subjects for years. One day she gave in to just abstractly putting colors on the canvas and discovered a real talent. Beautiful abstracts. I want one and told her so.
My advice is to not go through all of life without really trying a few forms of expression. There is no doubt that numerous people reading this have a real undiscovered talent.
As to inspiration. Commit to the work. Discover the work without the joy. Suffering is the bread and water of art and always has been. So all here are qualified. Do the work slavishly without attaching concepts and you will be rewarded by furthering your understanding. Work for money is labor. Work for the thing itself is art.
And just to make sure the penny drops - caregiving is an art of love. And all artists suffer the work. That is within the nature of it.
I have always enjoyed sewing and reading but I find as I get older it is harder to do because the eyes are giving me problems. Really liked making doll clothes for the grandchildren.
Like Mimi, my "artistic" talent has been photography. When I retired in 1997 I started a photography business. After a few years I found that I loved taking pictures, but was no good at marketing them, so I gave up the business, but kept on taking pictures. Over the past 2-3 years I have essentially put my cameras away. I take occasional pictures of family activities, but none of the scenic or nature pictures of the past. I stlll see shots I would like to take, but, even if I have the camera with me, I don't stop the car to take the picture. With all the snow we have had lately there should be some really great winter scenes, but I don't have the energy to go out and find them, even when my wife is at day care.
My creative outlet has always been interior design and I find that it is an escape from the reality of my current life. I have continued to do decorating/renovation projects through the 5 1/2 years since my husband's dx because they are something else to focus on. Also, they give me a daily "lift" because we are spending so much more time at home.
i dont have the motivation to do anything. Im bored bored bored. I feel as if no one even remembers Im alive. I used to do a lot of things, my favorite, working in my yard. But the winter time is the pits! I can deal with this better in the summer, with sunshine.