I don't know why, but lately, we've gotten calls from people we haven't heard from in a while. An old business contact called (friend more of DH's than mine; although I've never met her in person, she gave our oldest a beautiful throw with his name on it when he was born 10 years ago.) I don't know if she heard about DH's AD from someone at the co. who knows. She left a message and I haven't known how to handle it. Do I call her and explain his illness, then let him talk? It's so awful and awkward. I know DH won't seem like the same man she used to laugh and joke with years ago.
His old buddy from work called too. He knows about the AD, but I know DH can't dial the phone and initiate conversation with him, so do I call him and sort of "introduce" DH onto the phone or what?
I was wondering, how do you all handle it when old friends of your LO call?
I think that depends on your LO's level of comfort on the phone. My husband talks little and hates to talk on the phone. In my case, I explain the situation and the callers seem okay with that. If you think that your LO would know who the person was without the visual reminder, then by all means let him talk for a short time. I would however talk to the person first to let them know what to expect and to ask them to reminisce by saying 'I remember when..." as opposed to :Do you remember when...?"
During the earlier yrs it was an issue i felt i had to 'coverup' for DH when a friend called and spoke with him, i would stand next to him and prompt his answers. i finally told everyone who called about the Ad. there are only 2 friends now that call that have been lifelong friends to him. his better friend just talks nonstop without asking lots of questions, justs rambles on the phone when i put the receiver to him like theres no difference and my DH just listens and smiles. this friend had a mother who had AD so knows the ropes. the other friend quite calling after i explained he doesnt really remember whos calling. its sad.. i send emails sometimes to update his close friend now instead of putting him on the phone. once you tell them of the AD LOTS of us find that, friends AND family will not be calling as much. and its then we need them most. divvi
My wife's sister and a long-time friend call fairly regularly. I take the call and chat with them for a while, then ask "Do you want to talk to M?" I then give her the phone and she listens while they talk, giving an occasional response. She seems to enjoy these calls. Most others I take the call and give them an update. She does not initiate any calls (but she has never liked to use the telephone).