Good-Morning , When my hb gets angry with me, and hits me or shoves me or throws things at me,who do I call if I am hurt and need medical attention. If I call the police they will arrest him for domestic violence,or do I call an ambulance?? But if the ambulance comes, the police also come, or do I just find a way if possiable to the hospital or doctor?? The reason I am asking is his doctor took him off Aricept 2 weeks ago, and everyday he is getting meaner!!! The doctor said to give him a seroquel when he gets upset or pacy,or antsy, which is what he has been doing for the last 2 weeks. Hb is 6'2 and weighs 189 pds and I am only 4'8 , so if he ever hit me or what ever he could really hurt me, so I am getting alittle weary of him. We have been married for 22 years and he has never hit me or anything, a pure gentlemen, but lately he has been wanting to hit me!!! So any idea's would really help. Thank-You for your time!!! Have A Nice Day, if that is possiable????
The issue is not to wait until he hurts you--talk to the doctor today and tell him you think you are in danger. If he is hitting, shoving and throwing, you need to take action immediately. Perhaps he needs to be back on the Aricept, if this is the result of taking him off. I would seriously question the advice about waiting until he gets upset BEFORE giving the Seroquel. It should be given on a daily basis to PREVENT problem behaviors. I believe there are other psych meds that can be given on an as-needed basis if extra "oomph" is needed to calm him. Others will be along to tell you about those, I'm sure. Be proactive on this Colleen, change doctors if the current one won't listen.
Colleen, you should also talk with your police when there is not a problem and tell them the situation. Stress to them that he has Alzheimer's Disease and may have spells of violence over which he has no control. This way they can come help you when he gets violent without arresting him for domestic violence.
Colleen, do NOT wait until he hurts you. Call his dr TODAY and avise him of the behavior changes since the Aricept was stopped. Make sure you tell the office it is an emergency so he takes your call. I've written often about the experience I had with my hb's anger and physcial assualt. I called 911 but all that did was make me a domestic abuse victim and get him involuntarily committed into a psych hospital and I couldn't get him out. My DH is home and under control - he takes a rather high dose of seroquel (350 mg/day), clonopin 1x/day or as needed if he starts getting antsy/pacing, etc. and neurontin. They have been working, but each patient is different and it may take a while to get the right combo of meds which work for your DH. It takes a few weeks for the seroquel to take full action because it works by building up in the system, so I am surprised your dr advises to take as needed. That's why we have the colonpin (a controlled substance) to manage the unexpected. Hope this helps. Good luck!
i also agree with the other posters. one should not wait for the aggression to happen but in my opinion try to stay ahead of it with medications. without them its almost a sure thing they get aggressive at some point or another. some later than sooner or vice versa. if hes already this aggressive you should call asap today and insist his dr see him. maybe he can intern him voluntarily for med adjustments and get him stabilized before you bring him back home. being such a difference in height/weight is not in your favor. please take action now. like they said above tell the dr you are in fear of him. he has an obligation to help you if you say this. do whatever it takes and dont have guilt about admitting him for med adjustments it may be the only way to keep him at home later only unless hes stabilized. good luck. if it were me, i'd call his dr and ask him to meet me at the emergency room admissions! divvi
Colleen, this is what I did: I called the non emergency number of our local police department & told the lady who answered that my DH has AZ. I told her that he isn’t violent, but I know that is a possibility & if I felt my life was in danger & I called 911 would they take him to jail or to the hospital. She told me that it all depends on the situation, but normally they take AZ patients to the hospital for an evaluation & to get their meds adjusted. Then she told me that before that happens I could go to the circuit court & petition to have him evaluated at the hospital .When the petition is approved a police officer comes to the house & transports him to the hospital. I’m sure that would go over big. Of course my DH would probably just think that he was getting to go on an assignment with the officer.
Colleen, everyone gave you really good advice and what Elaine did is great. If you don't want to do that for your first step because you are not sure of how bad it is going to get, I can see your point because I have gone through that too. My husband is normally a very quite, non agressive, to the point of not even being assertive let alone aggressive. What I did was I told a friend that my DH's personality seems to be changing and it is possible that he may become aggressive. Thankfully she is probably the only one that believes that it is possible for him to do that, so what I would do if he appears to be going to hit me I would call her. She would come over and just observe him under the pretense of coming over to visit. Of course if he actually hit me I would call the police and when they got here I would tell them what he has going on. He has Vascular Dementia and he needs to go to the hospital instead of jail.