Hi--I'm new here. This is my first post. My husband has had some episodes of ALZ symptoms, yet he's sharp as anything 99 percent of the time. The ALZ symptoms have been an instance where he got lost, several years ago, and some other instances. He is very combative verbally and emotionally, and a few times has been physical/threatening towards me. He's 78 years old and insulin dependent diabetic, Type 2. He's always been abusive towards me, in the 20 years we've been married. So I don't know if he's just plain mean, or if his acting out is ALZ symptoms. In the reading I've done on this site, this orneriness and combativeness is part of ALZ. He's very difficult.
Hanging On-you say you have been reading the posts. OK-next step is a neurological work up. Early diagnosis is by symptoms but a pathological cause they might be fixable must be ruled out. Good luck, bluedaze
At the Alzheimer's Association site there are two lists you might want to look at. One shows the difference between dementia symptoms and normal aging. The other shows the various stages of the disease. Also you need to know that there is more than one kind of dementia and they have slightly differnt symptoms.
Whether or not he has Alzheimer's, no woman should be abused, for any reason. If this escalates into physical abuse, not clear on that because you say "threatening" you need to seek help. Why are you staying with someone who is mean & been abusive to you for 20 years?
The symptoms of Alzheimer's are the same symptoms for a number of diseases and conditions. (parkinson's, strokes, tumors, etc) They will check the patient for about 15 different causes, and if none of those pan out, they will diagnose AD. This is because AD can only be for SURE diagnosed after a postmortem brain anaylsis. But if everything else is ruled out, it's more than likely.
Schedule an appointment with a neurologist. There will be preliminary visits, an MRI, a PET scan, and a few other things done. They go in a specific order, like a checklist. Then they will let you know.
My daughter's MIL stayed with an abusive person; I've often wondered about that, too. Didn't seem too smart. One word of warning...AD can increase the person's personality. (not always, of course, but often.) AD people frequently display depression, agression, or paranoia, depending on how much they displayed that 'before'. You may want to reconsider staying with a person who could very likely become even MORE agressive due to this disease. My DIL's grandmother had to run for her life when he pulled out a knife on her as an AD patient.
We're here for you...please keep in communication with us. We've been there...you are not the first or last person to deal with these issues, and you have a whole group of people who want to help you. Please let us.
Thank you so much, everyone, for your helpful comments. I know, after all of these years, and you're right to ask the question, "Why have I stayed with an abusive person." Lots of dynamics there that come into play. Not a good thing.
I will be getting an appointment with our primary doctor Monday. She knows about his behavior towards me all of these years. I would think she will want to get assessments on him again, as was done years ago. Then, the assessing doctor said he was fine, but there was a possibility of future dementia. Well, perhaps now, the future dementia idea is coming to be a reality, at age 78. Also, on Tuesday I'm going to see the victim's advocate at the police department, with regard to his threatening me physically. I'm going to talk with her about the pros and cons of filing a police report about that recent incident.
Hanging On, I'm also new to this site, but you will find a lot of support here. Glad to hear about your doctor's appointment and especially the victim's advocate appointment.
Yesterday I went to the see the Victim's Advocate at the local Police Department. We had a lengthy discussion. She is very concerned for my safety, and feels my husband's behavior towards me is dangerous. We decided to get him assessed through his primary doctor referring him to a very good neurologist that the Advocate has had experience with. So on July 2 I will meet with the primary doctor to get this referral for testing.