We will move to a Continuing Care Community at some point. So far, we've been bumped down twice because I didn't feel we needed to move at that particular time. In the last month or so my DH has lost ground, considerably.. anyone have experience with moving a LO knowing that eventually that LO might have to make another move to full time care? I'm so undecided and want to make the best decision I can for his sake. I'm thinking (right now) that it would be better to make the move, let him be comfortable with me there, then if and when the time comes to put him in the AD section, I would be able to bring him back to the apartment for visits or spend time with him there. I guess I'm just looking for help!!! Thanks!
My motto is "sooner rather than later", and I stuck to it by moving to a continuing care community last year. We live in the Independent Villa neighborhood - little houses surrounding a pool and clubhouse. Next door is the Assisted Living building that also has a memory care unit. The best decision I ever made. Read these blogs from last year that chronicle my decision making process:
The longer I live here, the happier I am with my decision. He continues to decline mentally and physically. Just having PT on the premises is a Godsend. Not having to do one single bit of mainetance or pay extra for it is fantastic. I don't even change light bulbs. This year would have been a nightmare of monumental proportions if I had not moved here.
Thanks Joan. I read all the blogs and can relate to the decision. My DH is more advanced in this disease than yours was at the time of your move. I'm really dreading the move itself. He told me a few months back that it didn't matter where he was as long as he was with me. Maybe the day will never come that he has to advance from our "new home to the Alz. unit. But if that time comes, I'll be within walking distance, I could probably bring him to the apartment part of the time if (big if) that works out OK for him. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences on this matter.
Three years ago we moved from our home on the coast to this retirement Inn. Then 2 years ago moved from one apartment to another. My wife was probably stage 4-5 at the first move, then early stage 6 for the second. She tolerated both moves well, although recently, when we come back to our apartment, she will ask why we are going in there. When I tell her we live here, she accepts it.
I placed DH yesterday and hope that when I go over to visit today he'll have started adjusting. Seemed confused about the place and I reminded him that he's been saying he's leaving to move up north for a long time and that I'd said I'd find somewhere nice closer to home. Our CCC does not have an AD unit and will only accept them into the ALF or nursing home floor if they don't wander, which he did, or exhibit agressive behavior. He's much better off in this lovely place where he's safe. I only hope that he'll interact with the others there, as he hasn't done much of that here with the 'normals' I had assumed that the somewhat antisocial behavior was because at some level he realized he couldn't keep up with what they were talking about and preferred to isolate himself.
I was over there this morning (only 5 miles away) and was pleasantly surprised at how relaxed and pleasant he was. Frankly, I had expected the worst, that he would demand to leave, but all he did was ask how long he was going to stay there. I told him that this is his home now and he seemed ok with that. Whew!
We moved to a smaller house renovated to be wheelchair ready with my husband in very early stages. The problem was that he wanted to make decisions about all his own stuff, and wasn't really capable of it. We hired people to work with him on packing and unpacking because I didn't have the patience, but there is still so much clutter in his rooms because he isn't willing to get rid of much.