I am going to be the facilitator starting Oct. 6th for a new Support Group at the ALF my husband is placed in. I only agreed to this project, if it would be more of a chat group, where the caregivers feel comfortable with any concerns, mainly on the themselves. I love this forum, & was hoping something like this. With a speaker ever once in awhile, if, that is what the group is interested in. In another post MarilynMD mentioned incontinence supplies as a subject, which I never thought of, but is a very good thought.
I am coming to you for suggestions of any topics that you would like to discuss in a support group. I really want this Support Group to help others, the way every one on this forum has helped me. Thank you to Joan for providing a place that saved my mind & maybe my life.
Do you know that I depend on my own forum and you wonderful people for support now more than my face to face support group? And there is one main reason for that. Although here on the forum we discuss practical issues, such as incontinence supplies, finances, medications, etc., we discuss the EMOTIONAL UNMENTIONABLES, that are rarely discussed in my face to face group. An example is the "What is Love" thread and the sex and intimacy threads. 95% of my own issues are emotional, not practical, and I'm willing to bet many in face to face support groups have the same issues, but are reluctant to bring them up face to face.I bring them up in my blogs and encourage discussion on them.
So, Kadee, my advice to you is that after the members of the group are comfortable with one another, try steering the conversation to the emotional. If they won't go for it, they won't. You'll have to ask what it is they are looking for in a support group, and go with their needs.
Joan, in our support group, the topics we discuss here are also brought up at our meetings. The only problem is the support group meeting only lasts 90 min and we go around the room so everyone gets a chance to bring up what is important to them so lots of this gets tossed around..maybe all that needs done is to bold enough to bring up some of the topics.
Kadee--my support group is for "community spouses", which means, our loved ones are still living with us in the community. Because of that, we discuss pressing practical issues as well as emotional ones. Since your group is going to be conducted at an ALF, so does that mean that the LO's will already have been placed, or will it be a mix of those still living at home as well? I have attended both types of groups, and found that where the patient is living will determine much of the subject matter. Also, if you have adult children attend as well as spouses, that will change the focus.
I think the most helpful thing that has come up in our group is when we convinced several members to ask their spouses' doctors for anti-psychotic drugs. One husband was emotionally distraught and considering placement last month; this month, he said things were much better (at our suggestion, he had obtained Seroquel for his wife). He also listened to our advice and enrolled his wife in an adult daycare program, which is helping. So clearly, this man is not the type to research these things himself, the doctor nor the family isn't guiding him, his only resource is our group.
I agree with Mimi, 90 minutes once a month goes by quickly. It's great to have the face-to-face support, but frankly, if I had to choose between this forum and my group, I would choose Joan's website. I've learned more here than anywhere else.
Marilynn, I agree absolutely. It is so great here that you can search for the answer to any question, or just ask it at any time day or night. I find I'm not on here as much as i was the first nine months or so after I found it. But it still means the world to me to know it's here and be able to check in at any time. Thanks Joan!