And I'd just rather be alone. This man can be loving and pleasant one minute and for no apparent reason, a few minutes later, the look comes over him and he's cold, distant and basically unpleasant. I'm getting to the point that I just go into my sewing or computer room and do something else and just leave him alone. I'm already living alone anyway, so what's the difference?
mothert, I have the same thing going on...I can walk in the room and say hello to him and he just looks at the tv or continues talking to the cat. Or he will look at me as if displeased with something. Not a lot of talk..any more our conversations are me explaining what meds he is taking and why, or an appointment we have and why, or how the sensor light works and that is why you can't shut it off because is depends on the sun to keep the electric energy going some really simple things now do need explainations. then again something complicated like a bank statement or bill etc he plugs into.
Oh I forgot to mention, I do what you do...I don't go too far away since I have to make sure he takes his insulin before bed...but I do get on the computer or iron or something. We can't even talk about what is going on in a movie on tv.
My DW yells at all of us. Mom, Dad, Paul, Derek, Kirk, Dr. ? All are figments and all comments are directed at me. Her Dad is dead and Mom lives 200 miles away. She tells us all to go and never come back. She tried to pour water on my head this morning. I hate this disease.
mothert, better living through chemistry. Ask the doctor for an sri. And something for him.
I think one thing that would have made me put my husband in a facility is if he had been too big for me to handle, and I didn't have others to help me. Our daughter lives with us, and helps, and I have the CNA Andrew morning and night. But the size thing is impossible to deal with alone.
I went through absolute Hell two years ago with Sid. He was vile, verbally abusive, mean, insulting, horrible. I thought I was going to have a stroke from the stress. The doctor put him on Risperdal (anti-psychotic) and Celexa (anti-depressant) and me on Zoloft (anti-depressant). For awhile, the medications kept him calm and under control. For the past 6 months, he's been sweet and loving. He doesn't even remember the rages and all the abuse he put me through. I will never forget it. I know you did not mention rage specifically, but the meaness and distance can also be very disturbing and hurtful. Check out these blogs for what happened with us: