Storm warning up-probably lots of rain and wind. I'll stock up on cat food and wine. Need to check on frail neighbors who always feel some one will be there for them (growl)
Whomping good T-storms yesterday and last nght. More on tap for today and tomorrow. Ha 2 tree limbs in driveway this morning. Large end of the big one was as large a a man's upper arm near the shoulder. (Not a Ferigno shoulder but not a Wally Cox one either). Spent the evning with OT velcroed to me, and then Johnny Cash joined us. I think I'm the security blanket here.
My husband's birthday would have been on August 2nd. He was a multigallon blood donor. In his honor one of my daughters just donated a unit in his memory.
Zibby...Not so much busy....just very TIRED. And, if you saw how I struggle and how SLOW I am, you'd NOT be impressed at all. But, I DO get a lot done....I just keep plugging along.Today, I'm spending the day inside. Was happy outside last evening....then, John Deere died for no reason. Suspect an electrical problem that not even my neighbor could analyze. Wierd thing is, when I jump around on it, the panel lights up and it wants to start so, no Phranque, it's not a dead battery. *sigh* It's always SOMETHING. Got a tow back home. I'll have the equipment company come to pick it up Monday ($$$$!!!!!).
I have a strange (but I think healthy) attitude about death I've been told lately. Kept referring to the box of John's cremains as "Jack-in-a-Box" and the individual bags he had been separated into as "Dad in a Bag". Only my youngest found great (albeit brief) humor in it, though. At least I lightened up the moment when I handed the ashes off to her the other day.
TODAY, I'm going to begin my weekend by FILING away all these documents I have to continually dig out for Social Services. Get my office and family room (and kitchen table) cleared, reclaimed. FINALLY. My attorney reassured me yesterday that John will most likely be qualified for Medicaid and I shouldn't worry right now. Okay, I'll TRY and put it all out of my mind.... for now.
Going to neighbor's for a cookout this afternoon. Hope I don't have to bring anything but myself....unprepared, otherwise, Have a good day. Love, Jen
Enjoying being away from sister's place. As posted on another thread we kept busy yesterday and I didn't pay for the internet yesterday (have to pay daily). I was just fine - read some, went swimming, couldn't even stay wake until midnight!
Spoke with BIL yesterday. Seems his dad's retirement can't be settled until we find a Metlife agent here cause his dad's agent is not licensed in Washington. When I contacted one, she didn't seem to understand evidently never having dealt with this before. Hb's portion has to be transferred/set up in an IRA here then we can decide whether to cash it out or leave it in. It will only be about $7500 of which $3500 - 4000 is needed to license our MH in Washington. In Oregon there is no sales tax, so when licensing in Washington we have to pay it no matter how long we owned it in Oregon. Good thing is the sales tax will be deductible on our Federal taxes which should offset any tax/penalty on cashing it out. As it is now, when we are towing the car we put the bikes on back and I wrap a blanket around the sprockets/pedals so police can't see the Washington plates on the car then pull us over for having the MH licensed in Oregon.
We have an appointment Monday so will leave the MH here and drive to Vancouver - about 2 hour drive. And hopefully catch our cat to bring back with us. She was up to her 'cat and mouse' game before we left and she got left. But we hear the guy renting my sister's extra room is letting her in to sleep with him at night! She only goes to others when we are not there.
Beautiful day -- We spent the afternoon with Son and family at a little lake in the dunes near their town -- a lovely setting and great water. So much fun to be with kids on the beach. We took a chair for DH who of course would not change and not even take off his shirt or shoes and socks. But he was pleasant for the most part. Cracked peanuts. Then all of a sudden he wanted very badly to go home; that was OK, getting to be time to leave. Later I realized that must have been the moment that he wet his depends.
Hot, hot, hot here in the Ozarks. Hoping for rain tomorrow. Went to a couple social events with live music that DH loves the past couple evenings. Witnessed some amazing CONFABULATION last night as DH was telling some locals (we're a tourist town) about a local event of a couple years back. He told it with much enthusiasm but the facts were taken from bits and pieces of many things not related to the situation he described. These people didn't know of his AD and I wondered what they were thinking or if people even listen closely enough to even notice if a person isn't making a lot of sense or has the facts screwed up. It was exhausting. I prefer being around people who know or participating in things which don't require a lot of "small talk."
Hot here in PA and has been for several days. I went to the nursing home, fed Charlie his lunch and came home to lie on the couch for a while. While lying here, I had the strongest desire to go swimming. Now, I have not been swimming in a few years, so that seemed a strange thing to want to do. I happen to live just a couple of miles from a state park with a lovely swimming pool. I almost did it but got up and picked up the computer instead. Had I gotten out my out fashioned (and probably too small) bathing suit and gone to the pool, I am sure I would have ruined the afternoon for a lot of people, if I didn't clear it out all together. Oh well, maybe another time.
It is warm today too - we are in the mountains but still warm 88 right now. One plus to going to an RV park full of retirees - over half are plus plus sizes so I don't worry. Here they have hours just for adults - no children and there are usually only a couple others. It is an indoor pool and spa so very warm in there.
We're having a run of good weather here in the Pacific Northwest, and everyone is enjoying it, even though the lawns are all brown. Finally, my Sweet Peas are blooming - I do not have a green thumb so this is a minor triumph. My Marigolds never did thrive; it may have been the slugs that got them. My husband is continuing to do well at the new facility; therefore, so am I.
ehamilton. judith, charlotte....I haven't been in a swimming suit for YEARS, much less to a POOL since leaving Florida. Not that I think I'd scare anyone to death (well, maybe). I just don't OWN a bathing suit anymore. I have been known to slip into the stock tank, fully clothed, at the end of the day with a cold one, however. "You might be a Red Neck if....."
Today, working on getting the utility tractor hauled off and repaired. Hope its nothing complicated. What I did this weekend...Finished making everything inside spic-n-span, PUT AWAY ALL THE FILES THAT I HAD TO KEEP GOING THROUGH for Social Services and lawyer ("this house is CLEAN"), potted flowers and made an oasis out of my back deck and front porch. Oh, and I went to church. (Nodded off...so embarrassing) Later, going into town with my side-kick (my neighbor).
Not quite as hot here today, so got out early to work in the yard. And DH actually trimmed the hedges! I was right with him to hold the cord so he wouldn't slice through it, but he did the work and did a very good job! I pulled weeds, straightened out my knock-out roses a bit, etc. Came in and showered, had lunch and that's it for the day! DH is playing games on his laptop and I'm here on this wonderful site. Then just going to read on my Kindle for PC. I love it!
Hey all! I am sitting here at the town library on their computer, to reassure you all that I am fine. I got a call from Frank after mu comment on Facebook that I was going off the air for awhile. I just needed some down time and was trying to get away from the computer and into reading. He called and said, "What are you a radio station, or something?" Typical Frank, lol. He called again today, and I told him that my computer crashed, my daughters when kaput and I still haven't fixed my desktop from when the boys logged off instead of signing off. Of course back then Jim couldn't remember the Admin password so I was/am stuck. So I am fine, trying to simplify my life, heal and move on. Not an easy road by any means. My Dylan is back in the hospital, will be going into LONG term care, as the poor guy just can't handle the lack of structure of home life. He needs the kind of routine that would drive the rest of us nuts. He is thrilled to be going back to residential. That shows how much better he feels with the structure and routine. That helps me feel a bit better about him being out of the house again. Plus life is no longer filled with drama. On top of that I have plantar facitis, which is killing me, 2nd cortisone shot today and now a night splint. My knees are full of arthritis and I will begin a four week treatment of a gel type injection in each knee when we get back from vacation. Speaking of vacation. The Maine Grandfamilies Organization gave us free use of a condo up north in the mountains for 10 days! The condo owners assoc. decided to join forces with Maine Kids n Kin and allow use of their condos for 10 days each summer! This restores my faith in the goodness of people. Most of the owners only use their units in the winter for skiing. Sunday River is in the Maine section of the Famous White Mountains. It is very quiet, very beautiful and I can't wait to get back to nature! My daughter will house and pet sit. So you can all relax, I'm fine, thanks for caring. Love you all, Susan
This is why we men need you women: at my grandson's birthday party Saturday, we were cleaning up afterwards, and one of the bigger helium balloons got away from us and was up at the ceiling out of reach. Being the highly intelligent alpha male that I am, I grabbed a chair and held it by the legs and tried to scoop the balloon up with the back of the chair while another very capable male tried to grab it, but couldn't quite get it. After several tries, one of the women said, "Why don't you just stand on the chair to reach the balloon?" Duh?
OH, JOE!! That's so funny...and typically MALE! My PT and I are always embroiled in some word battle about who is smarter, men or women! My arguement is always that women have more convolutions on the surface of the brain.....and because we are "wired" differently, we think in different directions. Men see a problem and want to ACT or FIX it........women see the problem, THINK about it and find the most direct and efficient manner to deal with it!
I have HORNETS, wasps and yellow jackets building little homes, waiting in places to sting me. Again and again. Going hunting for them today, armed with several cans of wasp killer ..... the kind that will shoot up to 20 feet! BUG SAFARI, complete with goggles, coveralls. It may rain here today. I need to spray for weeds that are encroaching on my gravel lane, do weed-whacking. No motivation. Can you get sick from stings? I haven't felt real well in a couple of days but keep plugging along.
Yesterday I left G while I ran my car in for a quickie fix..his request as he didn't want to wait there. His normal day is laying on the sofa ALL DAY LONG. I returned to find he had turned into Paul Bunyan again..cut down another tree with a tiny limb saw. The tree was not large so no harm done, but it is DOWN and needs to be cleaned up. Naturally I was livid and asked why in H he had done that..."I planted it" was his explanation. Why did I even ask?Now, the question is how did he manage to find that limb saw I had carefully put away? Where there's a will? This is tree #2, and I hope we're not going for 3!
Sounds like he is about at the point where he can no longer be safely left alone. At this point he may be fine most of the time, but you are starting to get the other parts of the time.
They are very good at hiding things and finding things that we think are completely safe and hidden - remind you of 2 and 3 year olds?
Well, dog on "doggie bedrest" is actually feeling a bit better and starting to put weight on her back foot. I feel so bad for her when I take the other one out for a solo walk but hopefully being patient will work for her. It has been interesting watching the other one as I have been walking her solo. Many of her "bad" walking habits have disappeared. She has been extremely well-behaved and loved the solo walks. It will be interesting to see what happens when I start walking them both again.
It is sad, but funny to me at the same time...watching the kids all bicker about WHERE their dad's memorial service will take place, WHEN, WHO will be invited, WHERE they will stay, WHAT WILL BE DONE. The whole ordeal has been wrenching but has brought several of the kids who were on the outs with each other closer. They're talking to each other again, at least. One wants to be the boss of everything because she feels she loved her dad most (these are NOT kids, but 30-somethings!)....the ex-wife, her husband and ALL her extended family will be there, mourning (?). Where do I fit in??? The two girls in Richmond are talking to me again.....a lot. And, NO, I am NOT invited to the memorial service. So, so strange. Meanwhile here I am. John never made any friends. He knew two neighbors but only as acquaintances. Two people at church the other day had heard of his passing. I asked my daughter to pass along to the others the fact that I may be feeling some sort of loss here, too. Guess I'd poison thier air, though.
Jen = you have two options in my eyes: you can go even though uninvited which will make your final statement to step kids or you can do something special that day and let it go. I would vote for #2 - let it go and treat yourself. For you, it is time to move on. I think you did the majority of mourning before he died. I think memorial services are highly overrated. People come and say things they wouldn't say to the person when they were alive - it is for them to feel better, not the deceased. Another option would be to write a letter to John and then bury it.
Yesterday we let early (for us) to drive the 2 1/2 hrs to Vancouver to fill out paperwork for hb's portion of what is left of his dad's IRA. It is not much but it will enable us to finally license the MH in WA. As everyone here knows, legals stuff is never as easy as it appears. We needed a 'signature medallion stamp' on a letter and it took us 2 hours to find someone who would do it. Banks are suppose to do it, but they do a medallion stamp for securities transfer, not just signature. Our bank tried to find someone that would with no luck. We went to Chase where we had an account and found out at that when Chase bought out WAMU, the FDIC closed small accounts that had not been active in the last 120 days. Of course since I forgot to give WAMU our new address the money is now in a 'dead account fund' in Salem OR. Lesson: even though you do everything online, they still need your mailing address. Anyway, after much pleading Chase made an exception providing we open a new account and keep it open for 6 months. Opened a savings account and will close it after 6 months. Who knows, we may need a 'signature medallion stamp' again before things are settled. They don't use notaries anymore for some things because anyone can become one.
We got our kitty home now. I fixed her so this shouldn't happen again: I bought a small pet kennel at the thrift store that she will get put in the morning we are moving. We move on Thursday so that will be the first test. She seemed happy to be home - has spent the night and day sleeping in the middle of the floor!
Charlotte...my brain is fried trying to recall all of the manipulation of finances and all the legalities in attending to John's debt, Medicare qualification, on and on.
LET'S TALK ABOUT THE CAT or something!!! I'm SO glad you got your kitty back. I don't know what I'd do if I lost ONE of my animals. My hounds got loose a few months ago and I was FRANTIC!! All these guys and girls are my family. I'm sending some of my stock to auction later in the Fall and its heart breaking for me. 'Cause, that way, I won't know where they're going and for what purpose.
Speaking of FAMILY....I do like your suggestion #2. Let it go. I WILL write a letter this evening to my daughters in Richmond. Just tell them gently how I feel, that I am mourning, too, but in a different fashion. Yep, I've done most of my mourning all along the way. I just want them to understand that I have feelings, too, and maybe they need to consider how NOT to burn bridges. They're hard to rebuild once destroyed. Like the idea of writing a letter to John.....at this point, it would be a letter of forgiveness.....and burn it or bury it and have my own "night out", a treat for ME. Thanks. Jen
Oh, Geez, I just thought of something....the way my family is behaving right now.....what if one of my girls got married? Would I not be invited because the others don't want to be in my presence????!!!! Or, would the others refuse to come because I would be there??? This is all so sad and absolutely unforgiveable. I raised those kids. All of them, none different than the other. Oh, well.
Jen, when we left last Wednesday from my sister's our cat escaped so had to stay behind. she was fed and spoiled but we did miss her.
Just had a thought while reading your post: how about in that letter to the kids telling them you have no desire to attend a memorial service because you are doing your own special memorial for their dad. Otherwise, turn it back on them you don't care if not invited (just don't say that).
Like it, like it. I need to be firm and unwaivering but gentle with them......make a statement. Let them know that I think I was significant in their dad's life (and their own) and that I did indeed love him. Why else would I have stayed through everything, if not for hope and love??
I think you're right, Jen....you win. Of course, I could have said I didn't want anyone standing on a chair reaching up high...could lose balance and fall. But I took the high road and just laughed and blushed.
Up early this morning, can't sleep. On Friday a college classmate of mine, Dr James Hall, was lost in a plane crash over Lake Michigan. He was retired but was accompanying a patient who was a friend and his wife to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota for cancer treatment. Last I heard, only the pilot (another friend) survived, no others have been found. I got up to look for news on the internet, but no luck. Jim was able to send a message to loved ones in a medical bag that he was able to seal just before the crash.
Jim was not a particular friend at Heidelberg but some years later, his younger sister and my younger brother were again in the same class there -- and got married. So I have followed his life and career through my SIL. The two siblings have been dual caretakers for their (childless) elderly uncle, and took turns driving some distance to see him in his facility.
JeanetteB-Sorry to hear about your friend. The paper in Minneapolis has been following it it but it doesn't look like there are any new updates. You can keep watching the website site www.startribune.com and type in the search field "plane crash mayo".
Been a nice day - overcast but still warm. I had hb put the bikes on the car, roll up the awning and other outside stuff so he doesn't have as much to do tomorrow. It won't take me long to pack/move the inside for our trip. Tomorrow we go to Vancouver where I have my class reunion this weekend. Then next Tuesday we leave to go to another one of our membership parks for two weeks. At that time we move to another one on the Washington Coast. Not sure after that.
Was looking for something today and going through papers (you would be surprised the papers that can be stuffed away in a motorhome). Didn't find what I was looking for but I did find a typed paper that hb's sister gave me in 2006. this was a year after her official diagnosis. In it she expressed her sadness that her daughters were selling off her collectibles and presents from her deceased husband. That and her sadness over her diagnosis. I don't know why she gave it to me, but it was so sad to read. His sister said they sold them to de-clutter her apartment but I never understood why her daughters could not wait until she no longer remembered. He hb died around 1999 from complications of diabetes and then in 2001 their mom suddenly dies of a massive heart attack. She never got over either of them and I believe, still, she went in to a deep depression and never really recovered. Maybe in her case it trigger the AD to show earlier than it may have otherwise.
Today.....IS HOT. I worked outdoors all day yesterday in the same heat and about collapsed. NOT doing that today. Going to spray herbicide (maybe) but at least I'll be on a tractor and NOT walking around, heaving things around. Just have to be careful about too much sun (but I love being berry-brown!).
Later, going to the store. Need stuff to cover my "ol grey head"...yes, I color my hair. Getting a few things for dinner tonight. I'm having my neighbor and his daughter over for his birthday dinner. Bob will be 79. Making fried pork chops, creamed new potatoes, a green pea salad and having a birthday cake. Can't put 79 candles on it, though. I AM, however, going to bundle two boxes of party candles (red) with electrical tape, put a "fuse" in the middle, place it in the middle of the top of the cake. Cutting out letters from a magazine to read "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" and "HAVE A BLAST" . I call it my terrorist cake. I won a prize for it in some women's magazine (Family Circle?) many years ago. Anyway, I'll have company tonight, will get to use my good stuff and show off my southern cooking skills! Making fried chicken livers, too, with gravy and onions. No one will eat those but me. Too bad. More for ME! (I know its bad for ya....but I only do it once in a while)
Oh, and Phranque and TJ and anyone else who had suggestions...I don't know what was wrong with the utility tractor, but the equipment company delivered it back last evening.....must have been something simple. Apparently, no parts had to be ordered. Something probably just came loose. I couldn't figure it out. Too much like an automotive engine. Complicated. So, John Deere is right here, good as new. (afraid of getting the bill, don't want to call about it....."I'll think about it tomorrow")
Jen, fried chicken livers with gravy and onions....save some for me.....! I love liver...any kind and luckily have some friends who enjoy it, too. So every once in a while I will have them over for a "Liver Fest"!!!
Your cake sounds really neat....what do you use for a "fuse". It sounds like something I could make for friends' birthdays....
I am in the St. Louis area and we are enjoying a cooler day today with less humidity...thank goodness. But we should be back in the "blast furnace" in just a few days.
Jeanette, I am so sorry to read about your friend.
I love liver Stunt Girl....that sounds so good. We have a great I-HOP near us (some are so bad never go back again) but this one is super and they have liver and it is great. I always order it because I don't want to cook it for myself.
Had a very interesting time yesterday. As I have mentioned before, my wife is now on Hospice. One thing they do is bring a singing group to sing for the patients. For her I suggested that they do it in the main living room of our retirement Inn and invite other residents. It's a good thing I made that suggestion, as the group consisted of 19 people. They would never fit in our apartment. The singing was excellent and my wife seemed to thoroughly enjoy it. She was beaming through the whole concert and joined in singing, even on songs I didn't know she knew. They sang mostly well-known hymns. One song, about looking at the joy in life, seemed aimed directly at me. Our 2 daughters and my sister were in the audience (Our son is only here for a few days and it was a good sailing day, so he missed the concert.)
We'll be joining all the kids and their families for dinner tonight. If things go as planned, my wife's sister and her husband will get here this weekend. Fortunately, we have enough bedrooms at our home, and my wife and I will sleep in our retirement Inn apartment. It's only a 20 minute drive from the home.
Yesterday was my Birthday. Thanks to good friends it has extended to the entire month. By dovetailing our in-home help with my 4 hrs. respite time (per month) I had a wondeul 6 hour "meetup" with danielp. We toured the Frederick Meijer Gardens and Sculpture Park and saw the Chihuly Exhibit there and had lunch at Applebee's. The Chihuly Glass Sculptures are remarkable, and designed right into the Gardens. Some look like they grew right there. Plus had calls from Mom., Daughter, and a good friend who has my exact Birthday down to the hour--only 30 years younger. Then last night it occurred to DH to say, "Happy Birthday, Barb....Luann.......Carol." He tried. And finally got it right. I said "Thank you." Nice cap to a humongously wonderful day.
I haven't checked in for a while just reading the posts. Yesterday was the closing on the town home. I was starting to wonder if it would take place. The lawyer for the sellers had a death in the family so they couldn't be at the closing. I called our Insurance company two weeks before the closing and gave the information on the new place and said to send it to the bank who would then send it to our lawyer. Two days before closing I get a call from the lawyer asking about insurance! I told him I had called two weeks ago so he said he would call. Later that day there is a message on my answering machine from the woman who was supposed to take care of the insurance but she was going to lunch so I should call after 2.00pm. Called twice and no-one knew where she was so I asked for the guy who owns the agency...he's out to lunch!!!! By this time I am furious. Finally got the woman and she starts telling me there were two people out of the office that day. I told her I wasn't talking about today I am talking about two weeks ago. It ended up I told her that if she couldn't have taken care of this in two weeks she needed another job. That is finally settled and on Thursday I met the realtor for a final walk through at 2.30pm. From there I stop at the electric company to make sure they leave the electric on and go to the bank so they can make a wire transfer to my lawyer. When I get home I make a call to the water company they tell me they don't have anything in that area and it must be a different county. I give up and call the realtor and she checks on it. In the meantime DH tells me I had a phone call but he doesn't know who it was or what they wanted! After a while I get a call from the bank to verify the amount of the transfer. Yesterday morning I go to the closing and sign or initial a mountain of papers. Get home and get another call from the bank, they had transferred the money to the lending bank and not my lawyer, it had been sent back, I gave the information from the printed out paper I had gotten from the realtor which I had given to the girl at the bank so they were sending it out again. On Monday I have to call the furniture store where I ordered 2 new bedroom sets and see if the will be deliverd this week. The way things are going they probably won't and I can't get the rest of our stuff moved until we have the bedroom furniture. I have decided the next move I make will be when they carry me out, which could be any day now with my blood pressure.
Did all my heavy outside work yesterday. Hurray! I'm getting caught up!!! Today, will work on bank statements, ads for horses for sale. Maybe take me out to see a movie tonight. Maybe check out e-harmony online (OOPS! Did I say that OUT LOUD??). Just seeing if any one is listening.....maybe.
Woke up to overcast, cool (er) weather. Should rain. God, I hope so. Laid the nice oriental rugs mom gave me. The cat hasn't thrown up on ONE, yet. Think I'll do something girly like a pedicure on myself...and a manicure. Going to church tomorrow...try not to fall asleep this time, though. If things keep going along like this, I might challenge myself and sneak up on my studio tomorrow afternoon, see if I can still work. (Wish I could get a well-paying job that calls for screaming at cats)
Jean, what a time! Life is sure complicated these days, with more and more people incompetent. It's getting so I'm surprised when someone does a good job. Hope the rest of the move goes more smoothly.
Thanks bluedaze* and Mary75, I've calmed down a LOT since all of this went on. What didn't help was DH asking me about the building here. We only own the condo not the building! Then he is talking about the man in England like he has something to do with us selling the condo. It is hard to understand how our LO's come up with this stuff.
Beautiful and cooler day here today; DH just vacumned the hallway and den (wood floors). He loves my Dyson Ball and volunteers anytime I get it out. LOL
Our outdoor thermometer that we hang on the kitchen window of the door to the porch broke, so bought another cheap digital one at Lowes. It never got above 70 on it yesterday and it was 89 deg.! Took it back today and got another one - a little more expensive. Been hanging there all morning and it's still on 72.8. NOT! guess I'll have to find the old type - non-digital - but can't find one anywhere that has the suction cups for attaching to the window. I guess if that's my only problem today, I am blessed.