Is it just me or does caring for a loved one with ALZ result in the caregiver gaining all the weight our loved ones have lost? I have put on so much weight and have no desire to start yet another diet. We have so little joys left in life but my joints are killing me and I know that I would feel better if I dropped a few pounds. Does anyone else have this problem?
My hb and I both gained weight. He use to weigh a steady 175 but is not up to 205. I have put on 55 pounds since we got the diagnosis. Most of it is not due to eating more but less activity. Also, I have a medical condition that has a side effect of obesity plus genetics - can't win!! I was listening to the interview with Tom DeBaggio's wife and something she said mimic kind of the conclusion I came to a few weeks ago. There was also something said in one of the threads here. I went into a depression (as she did) and was waiting around for him to progress and die. Well, wasted time and now I pay for it by all the extra weight too. I am trying to get my back side up and doing more, have gone to plain almonds for cholesterol instead of chocolate covered almonds ( miss the choc.) and eat only a handful instead of munching on them all day and evening. I have cut them and other snacking out but still have not lost any. Guess I should be glad I haven't gained anymore. If the weight gain keeps up I may stop the Serenity Formula I am taking as one of the ingredients in it is known to cause weight gain.
Hb's niece said her doctor told her caregiver stress causes weight gain! (she cares for her mom) There you go.
Go to the top of this page, and hit "search". Type in "emotional eating", making sure the topic circle is filled in. That should let you know - YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
I would not want to count the tons of weight put on just by the spousal caregivers on this site.
Stressed? Grab a brownie or two or three or the whole batch. Top them off with hot fudge. Too tired and depressed to cook? Olive Garden delivers those breadsticks and pasta dishes.
When there is no conversation, no companionship, no intimacy, nothing but work, stress, worry, and sadness, food becomes our friend and lover. Which does nothing except cause more problems and stress, which cause us to..................eat more.
Jean, just keep those calories going in! I'm having a yard sale this weekend, and I've made a hundred trips from upstairs to downstairs, so.....more chocolate!!!
First I lost alot of weight. Lately I have been gaining. It's a beautiful night and I would love to go for a long brisk walk but I can't leave my husband alone for that long anymore.
I never had a weight problem, unless it was losing weight! Now, just like phil4:13, I've gained 20 lbs! For the first time in my life, I'm overweight. I hate it! But I seem almost powerless to stop with the sweets! I watch the other stuff but when it comes to sweets, I'm lost. And, as said above, I need to walk, but that's easier said than done. The weight is not helping my knees...
How can you help but gain weight when your loved one craves sweets, you bake and eat it with him/her. Then there is no time to work out, you can't even leave the house to walk! He was gaining 10 lbs a month. What was I going to do, tell a dying man he couldn't have what he wanted to eat? So I gained too. However, I am down 22 lbs and counting!
My problem was that the only social activity that we had left was going out to fast food restaurants. It had to be Wendy's, Arby"s, etc. because she wouldn't sit down, but we did enjoy getting out of the house and doing something together. Of course, this doesn't bode well for the weight problem. Since she has been in the nursing home, I began trying to lose weight and did well for a month. I actually lost 10 pounds! Now I am so depressed every time I see her, I rationalize that I deserve to eat whatever I want. I even rationalize that I don't care that it is bad for my health because I don't care what happens to me.
Susan L - congrats on the weight loss. I've tried everything and even on Weight Watchers I get to 7 lbs and I hit a plateau! After a month of not losing anything I start back to eating. I weigh WAY too much. Have always battled my weight (and usually lost). The only time I really lost and kept it off for 2 years was on a program called Weigh Down which stressed eating what you like but in very small portions. I felt great but then slowly kept upping the portions until I am back were I started. Got bad knees (already had one partially replaced, have arthritis all over, and high BP!) and you'd think that would get me motivated - but can't walk for any length of time because me knees won't take it. Arrrrrgh! I'm only 64 and fell like 80!
Phil, I started with Jenny Craig, then at 20 lbs switched to a more affordable Smart Ones put out by Weight Watchers for lunch and dinner. I have Kashi Cereal for breakfast, fruit through out the day and 94% fat free popcorn at night. Lots of water, I also have a Fiber Bar with a cup of coffee in the afternoon. Sometimes instead of the popcorn I have a Skinny Cow Ice Cream at night. I like the frozen meals only because I am too tired to count points and watch portion control. This way it's all done for me. AND IT'S WORKING!!!
baltobob, you should ask your doctor for something for your depression. You don't do yourself or your DW any good by feeling that way. Let us know how you are doing, we all care.
As an aside, I am listening to music of the 40's. The one that just came on is "Ac-cent-tchu-ate the Positive". Very appropriate for the present discussion.
baltobob, please listen to Marsh. We all get down, but we have survived the worst, it proves that we are strong, WE ARE SURVIVORS! Please talk to your doctor. There is life after dementia. I won't lie to you, it's tough to go on after our loved ones pass on, but we owe it to their memory to go on and live a good life. We care, keep posting. Arms around, Susan
Marsh, I wonder if your music includes two of my favorite songs from that era...one is "There'll Be Bluebirds Over The White Cliffs Of Dover"....and the other one is "A Nightingale Sang In Berkley Square". No one I know has ever heard of either one of those songs but I've known them ALL OF MY LIFE... and I was born in 1939. My dear husband and I would sing those songs together on long road trips.. He loved all the old Andrews Sister's songs...and of course, anything Glenn Miller played.
Nancy, neither of those songs in on my CD's, but I remember both of them. I was born in 1931. There are lots of songs on the CD's by Glenn Miller, Benny Goodman, Bing Crosby, and the Andrews Sisters, plus the other regulars of that era.
Well here is my story... I went through one of those anthropormophic studies ( thanks to the USMC and a means testing for ht wt standards in 1978) and was told that based on all the measurements my ideal wt was 132 and by gum I stayed there. We ran PFTs which we all hated) but we kept in shape..and for years I held that wt. Then the Great Pause hit and finally, after my mother died of AD and being beat to death by the doctors and the admonition about HRT protections benefits from AD I broke down and took that crap..but not for long and not before a series of changes gave me a good 50 lbs. So here I am still in the starting gate trying to get motivated to get rid of the extra lubs...As someone mentioned earlier the WW has all this point counting and with so much going on with an AD mate..between running to doctor appointments, tending med boxes and setting out the doses for insulin now ( as of this week) who in hell has time for balancing WW points in addition to all the rest of the chores.. Well last night I saw my reflection in the kitchen window..sort of reminded me of Sir Walter Raleigh Ciggie ads.." so round so firm so fully packed". I thought naw that is window distortion so I took a peek in the mirror...uh well, uh the only word that comes to mind is UGH! So feeling really bad about it all, and not feeling tubby (funny how we get used to that wt and don't see ourselves that way) I decided last night I need to do something about this. I knowWW works..but I cannot bother with all that point stuff. So I got out the old diabetic exchange program and actually in the 1970s and even in the 1980s WW used a similar exchange I decided to do this..and since DH doesn't care a whit what I fix anymore always saying I'll have whatever you do..he can stand by..that is what he is getting...it may get a little boring since I can't have fish ( allergies)..I will chicken him into outerspace..yep..I'll make a meal for me and give his a saucer full since he won't eat more than that anyway anymore..( he snacks and has a craving for sweets like he never had before..what in heavens name is that about??) Anyway..wish me luck that I don't quit..I keep telling myself if I am not healthy and strong I won't be able to take care of DH as he deserves even if some days I would like to put him in the front yard with a sign " free to good home" which of course I would never do since I would miss him...That is my story and I'm stiking to it!
Mimi, our Clinical Psychologist at the Baylor Hospital and College of Medicine in Houston explained to me early on in our journey that the last "taste" A.D. patients have the ability to sense and enjoy is the taste of SWEET. She said that is the reasons many nursing homes will serve patients a sweet dish FIRST to get them to start eating. I was amazed!!! She was right!!! For a year, I'd put pudding on his plate and place a spoonful of it on his plate. He'd eat all of his pudding and then, as all of our loved ones do, he would proceed to eat around his plate finishing each item before moving to the next.
If your loved ones are not enjoying food, try ' to prime the taste pump" by giving him something sweet first!!!!
Who would ever have related this saying to Alzheimer's Disease..."Life Is Short .... Eat Dessert First!"..... It's a fact!
My DH now likes salty foods. He always did and still does like sweets but never used salt on his food. He would never eat nuts either but I recently bought can of cashews and he ate some of them. When he was first Dx'd our PCP told me to feed him whatever he likes. He has AD and will be 82 this year so why should I cut out the foods he likes as I used to do.
I agree, Jean21. I let DH eat whatever he wants, although he is good about eating whatever I fix. But he still wants his cherry cordial icecream after each meal - and that's okay - he's 87 years old - if that's all he wanted to eat I'd let him have it. P.S. I like it too!
MiMi, I'm rooting for you. Hope that you find the diet satisfying and stick to it.
On the DH diet note. My DH salts EVERYTHING! If I don't watch him he will put it in his coffee, on ice cream, or anything else including other really salty foods. I have to watch what I eat in front of him because he will try to "under eat" me. Has always done this. If I mentioned a diet he would go buy donuts or candy or he'd take food off his plate and put it on mine. I've battle him as much as my food cravings for years.
About the taste..several years ago and we think because of the meds he has had to take for diabetes, heart issues and hypertension..that that is what has affected his taste. He would say things are so bland and would had salsa to everything. He always enjoyed a sweet now and then but not often. I keep some of those sugar free Russell Stover pecan clusters..they are really good and he is good at not overdoing it. Just the fact he asks for sweets is an interesting change.
Interesting about the pudding. I think I'll just get some sugar free jello and try this out and see what he does.
Early on my husband lost his sense of smell. This is a common early symptom of AD. He doesn't have much of a sense of taste now. I think that is because the sense of taste is so closely related to the sense of smell. He really wanted me to make fried chicken last week - something I haven't done in a long time because of the fat in the oil I cook it in. I made it for him, and he complained that it didn't really have any taste. I feel so sorry for him.
WOW! Loss of sense of SMELL?? John complained for YEARS that he didn't have a sense of smell and then a few years ago said everything pretty much tasted the same. I remember being disappointed that he couldn't even smell ME anymore. Hmmmm. Never thought about ALZ being a factor.
My husband lost his sense of smell and taste very early on..now we go for texture! He can taste spicy and sour now and again. Makes cooking very challenging.