It's Mothers Day; the kids/grandkids gave me calls and gifts. I am blessed. But I am so very down. At 59 I'm supposed to be happy with a wonderful mate at my side. Not this... Anyone else down? I'm having trouble shaking it. Maybe I'll go dig in my garden...
MsAbby... here I am on Mothers Day, on-line, looking at the phone and e-mail for messages from the children I raised. Not a word yet. Maybe someone left me a message on facebook, haven't checked there yet. BUT....on the UP SIDE....I'm here in Newport News, VA visiting my parents!!! We just had a great meal at their community. Everyone's taking a nap right now, including my CAT! Yep, pretty down, but at least not alone today.
Color me blue, too; but kids e-mailed, a granddaughter brought a bouquet of mixed flowers yesterday. Daughter, et al dropped off a planter w/colorful flowers this a.m. Son sent a dog wood tree (said he was sorry it would mean some work for me). Local daughter & family & their 2 married daughters invited us earlier this week to go out to eat w/them today or to have a cook-out at one of the granddaughter's houses. Hb said he didn't want to do either. "I don't know those people." I'd mentioned one of the granddaughter's married name and said her husband's family might join us. He's met them all. So, we're here as every other day.
Mother's Day has been a downer for me as long as I can remember. I stopped celebrating when my kids were teenagers. Kids learn to make it special from their father. Well, hb did nothing to teach/show them it was to be special. When they were teenagers I wanted to do a 5 mile volkswalk for Mother's Day. they went with resentment and fought the whole 5 miles. That was the year I stopped Mother's Day expectations. I also started avoiding church on Mother's Day because pastors seem to always speak of the joy of pregnancy, delivery and the big joy of that baby. Well, I was never pregnant, never had a baby (kids were 1 & 2 when adopted). It was just too upsetting to sit through that. What really ticked me off was when I asked a pastor if he was going to mention any of that, he sad no. Guess what his sermon included??
We are going to meet my son, DIL and kids at a nearby park that has a playground and trails.Just talked to DIL and my son told her we didn't celebrate Mother's Day when he was growing up. She proceeded to tell him why we quit.
I can't complain as both kids were in contact although both were out of town. The funny/odd thing is G was very upset that he didnt have a card for me...I finally had to remind him that he has NEVER given me a card or anything else because I wasn't his mother! This has bugged me for 50 years! The sun is out and it is warm..basically a good day.
My Mother's Day was so-so. My daughters came and we had a nice simple lunch of cold cuts and dessert. They brought gifts and grandchildren and I enjoyed our time together. On the down side was the fact that my husband was not with me and the visit to the nursing home was not a productive one. He was very tired and did not eat much which is unusual for him. I left him dozing in his chair and felt as if my day was not complete. I would have liked a small smile or other sign of recognition, but got neither.
My wife had no idea today was Mother's Day. When someone at church or here in the Inn wished her happy Mother's Day she just shrugged. At church they gave carnations to all the women, but she refused to take hers. The only positive for me was that all three of our kids called. They didn't talk with her because she doesn't remember how to use the phone, but I got a chance to find out what they are up to, and give them an update on their mother.
This was the first Mother's Day spent without my 84 year old Mom. My sister moved her last fall into a memory unit out of state at the same time my husband seemed to be entering stage 6.
My daughter stopped over for a little bit but was in a weird mood.
The highpoint was playing and snuggling with my puppy mill rescue dogs. These "Moms" I figure have had a rough couple of years, too!
Had a decent day today. My son called me this morning from South Korea to wish me a happy mothers day and we talked for about an hour. He should be coming home sometime in June and will stay for a couple of months, but he is planning on going back for one more year if he can find a job that interests him. Spoke with my daughter yesterday and she is sick with strep, so I didn't see her today either.
Had a nice dinner and visit with my family. Weather was a little on the cool side but at least it was sunny. Husband didn't really know what today was, but that's okay. He never did make a big deal about it as "I'm not his mother".
Hb, son, dil, grandson and granddaughter and I went to a little park nearby. It is small (maybe about 6 blocks), wooded and has lots of trails crisscrossing and a play area. We went there and after a few minutes of the kids playing on the playground my son, true to nature, wanted to get going. We were smart and parked on the backside so we had to hike thru the park to get to the playground and hike back to the vehicles. Of course we kept asking the kids which trail they wanted to take so we kept walking. My son who prefers to sit with his x-box all day/night vs exercising wasn't too pleased but he didn't dare argue with me about all the hiking. It was level so no work and the little ones were having a blast exploring. We then went to McD's and had a burger and sundae and let the kids play for an hour. Of course my son was whining to leave. As I posted previously, this behavior is why I stopped doing Mother's Day when he was a teenager.
Overall, it was a fun day. It felt good to be out in the fresh air and sunshine.