I read your blog this morning, and I can't believe how much it has helped me understand my dh. He is not as verbal as you seem to be so it is hard to get him to tell me how he feels. I always think that he doesn't know how he feels. I look forward to your monthly blogs. They are so helpful. Thank you.
Dear Tracy, Thank you thank you thank you for sharing these insights into what you think and how you feel about things. It does go a long way to helping us not only understand the frustrations our loved ones must feel but also gives insight on how we might better our ways of responding to them, finding things to do with them that we can both try to enjoy for as long as we can. You are a marvel!
I am glad that my blogs are helpful. I have used them to help many follow down this pathway, now I am finding that I need someone to lean on myself as I am progressing.
Thank you so very much, Tracy. My DH often speaks of the "fog" that envelopes him - sometimes for just a moment, other times for a longer period. I can usually tell when it is happening, and I try to just be with him, hold his hand, hug him.
I wish my husband was able to articulate his feelings the way you do. When I see that something is troubling him and ask him about it, he acts as though he hasn't a clue what I mean. When he can't remember something or someone, he just says "It's because I'm older now and old people forget things and that's perfectly normal." But, through your words, it helps me realize what he might be feeling. Sometimes I feel the hurt in me just watching him. I feel so sorry for him, he isn't anything like the man he was just two years ago. I wonder, though, why YOU understand what's happening to you, but others, like my husband, don't. Do you think it's possible he does but just won't admit it? If I say something about his memory, he looks at me as if I was the one with the problem, certainly not him! Thank you for your insight. It helps so much. I look forward to your blogs.
My dh often tells me that his heart is breaking. It is so hard for him to tell me how he feels, but deep down I know that the man I have loved for 35 years is still there. Thank you for reminding me to never forget for even one second that with my love and patience we can make it one more day and the day after that.
Bev L, What a way to describe what we are going through - heartbreaking. I never realized it before, but I think that's what I feel seeing my DH going through what he's going through, actually what we are both going through - heartbreaking. I'll remember that description....