Today I attended my first local Alz Assn caregivers meeting. There were only 6 of us and the leader. It was an interesting session, not unlike our daily meetings here. I think every topic we have shared here, from concerns about placement of a LO, to having to move a LO to another facility, to driving, checkbooks etc were covered. And one member had lost a spouse about 6 months ago. No one there had heard of this website so I shared it with them explaining to them the folks who post here, and the topics covered. It is without a doubt a very useful location for us between monthly meetings. I hope these members do look into the site. I did tell them Joan was on a mission right now in DC so I am sure they will be interested in the news. They are all computer savy.
Anyway, a big thanks to Joan for this site. I don't think there is another like it and it is simply the best. Mimi
I have shared the information about Joan's site to everyone and anyone who will listen to me. It has and will be a place to me to visit daily, if just to check in on everyone going through this journey. I have gotten the advise I needed here. I have had a hand held in the middle of the night. I am not a group kind of person. The one Alheimer's support group I went to I left in tears and felt raw from the inside out. It just overwhelmed me and I couldn't go again. This site has been a haven for me to feel comfortable nesting in.
I check in her daily too, often more than once a day. I can see where the group meetings can be a gut wrench. But today it was good and the moderator, who is a young lady of maybe in her 30s, is a sensitive person, knows how to move a group along and gives anyone who wishes a chance to share or not..up to the person. The group today was a friendly group of people and just show the same temperament found on this site. One lady was near tears with the thought she has to maybe move her husband to a different location. But at the same time I think she left hopeful because she got some really good advice about facilities around our location. I do think we need to have local contacts here as well.
The support group I attend was the first support group of any kind that I ever attended, so I did not know what to expect. Based upon what others have told me, and my experience with substitute leaders when our social worker leader was not available, everything depends upon the person who is leading the group. He/she needs to be firm and in control. A good leader:
Squashes side discussions, and makes sure everyone is listening to the person speaking Does not pressure anyone to speak if they do not feel comfortable doing so Respectfully stops someone from rambling on endlessly off topic Allows people to vent their honest feelings without necessarily trying to "fix" the feelings Does not take over the meeting with his/her own stories of caregiving, unless it is short and relevant to advice someone is seeking Allows others to give advice and information before she/he does
Being a support group facilitator is not an easy job - a good facilitator makes it look easy.
Joan, if the women on the cruise were your group leaders, they were exceptional. I was so impressed by the difference between them and the leaders of the groups I have attended. You discussion of a good leader is great.
Yes, they are. Laura leads the Caregiver Group in exactly the manner I described above, and Donna leads the Memory Disorder Group. I don't know exactly what goes on in there, but Sid and all the other guys wouldn't miss it for anything.