I know I am in the wrong place. I am so sorry, I don't mean to insult. I am here because of my Dad who is caregiver to my Mom, at home in seventh stage. (From what I have read on the net.) Fecal incontinenece has just started,he dresses her , bathes her(she will no longer shower), the past two weeks her speech is garbled, or a string of words that make no sense. She has got out of the house and been at the next door neighbors door(a series of locks fixed that). She thinks my Dad is her father and I am her sister, and cries now and gets angry. He hasn't admitted it yet , but he has had two black eyes in eight weeks,that happened....during the night he says. They have been married 55 years and it is his sweetheart....and he couldn't put her away as he put it. Now I think he is at the end of the road.....They have done all the right things in their life, saved, have their own home. So no medicaid.... I have been looking into places...everyone takes medicaid. What does happen to your middle class citizen ??? They have medicare and Gap.
Years ago I discussed trusts etc. ----but, I was only the kid---- they are leaving everything to me...in a will. I know they can't take my Dad's house if he is living in it. They are in late eighties. I am sorry...so long and disjointed .... where do grown kids like me forum.
I don't need help with caregiving tips... (I have been able to cope thru this, offering care and support), how do you place medicare alzheimers patients?? Their Dr. is an idiot----sorry.... I made my Dad ask how we accomplish this...he said go to the hospital emergency room and ask for a psychiatrist...(by the way their Dr. is banned from both our hospitals...I learned a year ago....when Dad was admitted). Tried to change ...but he likes him and has had him for a zillion years. Can anyone answer my questions please.
I'm sorry about your mom and the problems your dad is having. He should see an elder law attorney who knows medicaid law. Just because they own a home and have some money doesn't mean that your mother is ineligible for medicaid. I do know it is easier to place someone quickly from a hospital but I have no personal information about it.
An elder law attorney is your best place to go for the information you need. The attorney would be able to explain all the details. Good luck. Maybe your dad would like to join this site, there are other male caregivers here.
Deb gave you the absolute best advice. Find a CERTIFIED ELDER LAW ATTORNEY who is well versed in Medicaid law.
To answer your second question about forums for adult children - Log onto www.alz.org. That is the main page. Put the mouse over "living with Alzheimer's". Scroll down to "message boards". Click on "Browse" or you can register right away. Click on Caregivers forum - you will find scores of adult children who can answer your questions.