I have noticed that my DH short term memory is getting shorter and he is more confused about rooms in our house. He is not getting lost in the house but sometimes confused what room something might be in. For example today he was confused about where the litter box was located. He is doing this more and more. He has no difficulty dressing himself so I's not sure if he is in stage 4 or 5. He can't remember phone numbers but recognizes everyone. Any help here?
My dh still seems to be hovering between stage 4 and 5. He is sometimes confused and loses track of who I am, or wants to go Home, but this is unusual and seems to have subsided again. He can dress and groom himself, although shaving is becoming increasingly difficult. It is becoming harder and harder for him to follow any instructions or do any household tasks. He needs help and guidance with almost everything. But he is still active, wants to go out, is still good on a bicycle and enjoys company and eating out. Sounds like yours is at a similar stage, beachgirl?
Yes, it does JeanetteB. He can still shave but needs guidance to do any chores. Now it is becoming more evident that he has AD. It has made me sadder! My DH likes to go with me but not so much with larger crowds.
I am one who hates trying to put labels on the stages our spouses' are in, particularly because they usually have one or more symptoms of a variety of different stages. That seems to be the case with your husband. And mine, for sure.
I think (just my opinion) that a more accurate understanding of where they are in stages is to plot the decline. It's usually a slow decline, a plateau, a decline, a plateau, a decline. My social worker says to look back 5 years and compare their functioning then to their functioning now, to get a clearer idea of how more or less they have declined.
And yes, each time there is a decline, it is a sadness or grief similar to a death. A death of another ability. It is an emotional mine field.
Beachgirl, My DH seems to be about where yours is. While it is frustrating to have to tell him how to do stuff and repeat things over and over - at least he can still dress himself, stay by himself when needed, bath by himself, etc. When I look back a year ago compared to now I go "ACK!" Kind of scary to think where he will be in a year. One day at a time, one day at a time. Shannon
John's doctor refuses to put labels (like stages of the disease) on his AD patients, for exactly the reason Beachgirl has pointed out. His doctor looked at me two years ago after an appointment and said, "you're going to be in a completely different place this time next year". Boy, was THAT ever true!! RAPID decline for John.
My wife is in stage 7. She is 58. She cannot dress or undress herself. She is incontinent. We must spoon feed her except on the rare occasions when she is very hungry and picks up a sandwich. She speaks only a few words and often not even that. She has not used my name in 18 months. She lists to the left when she sits in a chair and I don't dare let her near the stairs.
Two and a half years ago she was still driving a car and shopping for groceries. For some the decline is more like a plummet. There are days when my world is spinning so fast at the end of the day that I have to run around my room to catch up with my bed. I miss my wife.
I feel so badly for those of you whose spouses declined rapidly. My husband's decline is very slow, it is sad to see each individual skill disappear, but I think in the end it is easier to adjust to emotionally.
Thunder, welcome= i'm very sorry your DW (dear wife) has declined so quickly. some variants of dementia take more slowly traits while others like FTD seem to go rather quickly. there are members here with spouses of all forms. your wife is very young. so hard to see this as the golden years,:( join in any of the topics, there are many men here who post and care for their wives as well. its a well rounded group with good handson advice and support. divvi
Our daughter is my saving grace. She is 23 and a senior in college but lives home and arranges her schedule so as to spend as much time as possible at home with her mom. I still work (must work) life is expensive. There are about 20 hours each week when both my daughter and I must be away from the house and for those times I pay a home aide to come in. THAT is expensive... (extortion used to be against the law). So far we have been able to handle caring for Sharon at home.
Oh Thunder, so sorry to hear about Sharon's rapid decline esp. at such a young age. I agree with Marilyn that as hard as it is to watch our LO decline slowly I it must be easier than to have things plummet like that. I'm so glad for you that you have your daughter with you. And very glad you are posting here.