My DH is having a lot of compulsive behaviors lately, more so than usual. He has been cutting his own hair. I can't get him to stop it. In fact when I say something about it he does it even more. What he will do is play with his hair and when he feels like there is a piece out of place he will go to the bathroom and cut it. Besides the fact that there is hair all over the bathroom floor which is annoying there is also little patches of hairless head that I can't fix. I have told him that I will start cutting his hair if he would like for me to but after I do he still goes ahead and does it any way. My first thought is to just let him go ahead and do it but when we go places it is embarrasing. I know there are worse things for me to be embarrassed about to come but I am not sure how to handle this one and if I don't know how to handle this one then how am I going to handle all the others. This one is relatively easy compared to what I might be and or well be in for.
Deb, it might be time for a med change....check with the doctor. As you know, once they get something into their head (no pun intended) you can't do much about it. You could hide the scissors but he would probably drive you crazy looking for them.
You can buy clippers at Walmart and just buzz his hair off to a very short haircut, kind of like the military. It would actually be easier for both of you, if he would agree. Right now, my DH shaves his head with an electric razor, but when that gets too much for him to do, I will just go back to buzzing it off myself.
Thank you so much for your responses. I knew I could count on my AD family! I know that this is a small thing but all the small things add up! I will be looking for those clippers at Walmart the next time I go. I think the doctor needs to know about this too! I have seen so many changes in my DH in the last year I can't believe how advanced it becomes in only one year. Does it continue to do that or will there be a plateau that he hits at sometime or another? I know that everyone is different and they all handle it differently, what did you spouse do and how fast did they progress? I thought that they progressed faster the further along they were, is that still the case? I guess I am wanting to know if I can gage how fast I will have to make changes. I am afraid, though, that is not possible.
Deb - I am almost making myself sick trying tofigure these same things out. We finally have a diagnosis - FTD - and I think it has something to do with wanting to have some kind of control. If I can figure it out I feel I have some kind of control - ha! Today i went downstairs and he had thrown out half my silverware - he said we had too much which we probably did. Is this the beginning of a new behavior? I get tired of checking on his every movement but if I don't it seems we have problems. He's downstairs now finishing up the laundry. I know I should be there but I'm tired. That's when I get into trouble - when I'm too tired.
Deb, Joan is right about the compulsive behaviors. I see various ones at the facility my husband is in all the time. Some people scratch continually at themselves and others undress themselves over and over and over. This is part of the disease. The buzz cuts works well. My husband used to shave his head bald. Now, instead of going bald I have let what hair he has grow back some and just cut it on a regular basis as it starts to cover his ears. This has worked out much better.
There is no true gage on how fast they go. It all depends on how the disease is affecting them. Even that isn't necessarily a good clue as they progress. The average is 3-8 years after diagnosis but if you read about some of the people here, they are long past this and their spouse is still in pretty good shape. Someone put a link to a great article that talked about how long various stages last. Maybe someone knows what that was. ((hugs))
ChrisS There are so many variants. Jim's is the Motor Neuron Variant. He has lost just about 85 % use of his legs due to neuropathy and atrophy. Soon I expect he will not be able to participate in transfers at all. He is now experiencing the same "starting" sensations in his arms, shoulders and neck. I fear where it will spread next. He is also loosing his short term memory. His language is still pretty good, some sense of humor, but lots of confusion and he cannot stand any commotion. He goes into sensory overload very quickly. I will bring the FTD symptoms thread to the top for you.
Deb, I agree with the others, a nice handsome buzz cut should do the trick!
I can't believe I just read that someone's LO is cutting their own hair! My husband has been doing this, although he doesn't want me to know. When I suggest a barber, he says he refuses to spend the money on cutting his hair! That is just so stupid. We can afford a haircut. I though it was just for this reason that he was doing it, but perhaps he can't help it. He isn't cutting anywhere except at the nape of his neck, but it doesn't look good and when we're out (which is not very often), I have to keep telling him to pat his hair down in the back because his collar touches the hair and makes it stick up. I guess I shouldn't be worrying about what other people think, but I do.
This is strange! My husband just decided he isn't paying $14 a month for a haircut any longer. It's too expensive At least he isn't cutting his own hair. He bought equipment and expects me to do it. I hope he doesn't know what I pay for my haircuts.He is not going to be cutting my hair!
I am so glad that I brought this up, it is just another indication of how we are here to support each other. I also can't believe(sometimes I can) how quickly things are progressing with my DH. On the one hand I am glad that things are becoming so obvious because it has helped me to help him so much more but it is also an indication that this disease has it's own clock and is ticking on no matter what I do.
My husband isn't cutting the hair on his head but he has had a full beard for as long as I have known him (32 years). Recently he has been shaving daily (before FTD I was lucky if he shaved once a week) and the sides of his beard are getting lower and lower down the side of his face. One day he also asked me if he could shave it off. Told him not to because I like it, so far he has agreed to leave it for me. I'm worried that one day he will just shave it off before I can stop him. Hope this behavior passes soon.
My husband had always had a very nice beard. One day when I went to visit him it was gone. I asked him why and his reply was "I finally got a decent razor". Go figure.