My Dw has been crying alot lately. She is very aware of the loss in ability and this makes her frustrated. She knows that she used to be able to do something and now she will struggle with it wanting to do it on her own. She will finally give in and ask me to do it for her. She is very depressed about her situation. I do not want to medicate her, but it seems like she might be better off.
Welcome back Jeanette. I hope you enjoyed your trip. I don't think my DH realizes he has declined. I checked the symptoms today and it looks like he is in the moderate stage.
He's aware that his activities are limited (driving, for example, working...) and that it's because of his AD, but there's a definite limit to his comprehension of the extent of the problem.
mooorsb-- Please consider getting her a mild antidepressant. Put the shoe on the other foot--you can't do what you know you used to be able to, no matter how hard you try. You have to have someone else do it. This goes on with multiple activities and you don't understand--though you've been told-- why it's happening. Plus, you can't figure out what you can do about it. because there must be something.... Medication for our LOs is not to take away from them their ability to function. It is to help them maintain function as long as possible, by reducing their frustration and agitation.
Moorsb, he weighs 195 and takes one 50 mg. per day - in the morning. It has made all the difference in the world in his attitude, less frustrations and more calm throughout the day/night. Sertraline is the generic for Zoloft. I would talk to her doctor about giving her something to handle the mood swings and crying.
I believe hb is aware he can't do things and is declining, but it also seems to me he doesn't care and uses it as an excuse and doesn't do things he could do, physically, like help put the trash out.
Zibby, my DH can still do lots of physical things- but - he doesn't have the "reason" to figure out that he should do it or when he should do it. As soon as I remind him to take out the trash, he will. Otherwise,he keeps filling up the garbage can until it's overflowing. He will tell me the rug needs to be vacumned, but he won't "volunteer" to do it. But he will do it if I ask him to. Strange, strange....
My dh does know there is a problem and he is upset by this. Just today he came to me and said"We have to talk". The serious tone he was using surprised me, so I put down what I was doing and listened. He said "I think I have a problem, I keep loosing everything". Well this has been going on for over a year now, but for some odd reason today it became very serious to him. Over the last 6 months things have been progressing very quickly. Usually emotions are not noticable with my dh, nor is the reasoning ability here. His body temp and ability to taste or smell most of the time is gone. He is beginning to have issues completing his ability to shave, get dressed, follow simple commands spoken slow, or anything like that. The horrible thing is that he is fully aware of this.
Good food for thought, Vickie and mammie. The "reasoning" button--to realize he can or should do things. I hadn't thought of that. I just decided he didn't want to do things he didn't like doing--like taking out trash, vacuuming, etc. Also, he is cold all the time, wears weird combinations of clothes, doesn't eat much. Maybe his tasting/smelling ability is gone. Hadn't thought of that. Tomorrow I'll "test" him--if he'll cooperate. It's 6:30 and he's gone to bed, but I know he'll be up again in an hour. Thanks for your insights and experiences.
Zibby, the coldness seems to be very common. But with DH, he was cold all summer! Wore heavy winter clothes, no a/c or overhead fans. I was miserable all summer. Now that it is winter (and I do mean winter here!); he doesn't get cold! I make him dress warmly by laying out is clothes. But at night, for instance, he now wears shortie p.j.'s, and uses just a sheet. I keep the bedroom at about 67 deg. at night! I think his thermostat has reversed!
I finally gave in and started sertraline, 50 mg. It takes a couple of weeks to kick in, and you do NOT take it if there's a problem (there are other things for that) you take it daily. It has definitely given me an undercurrent of relaxation instead of anxiety. I've been trying 25 mg with my husband and it hasn't taken away much of his anxiety - for him it's about walking because it might make his leg hurt which is a reasonable fear but carried too far. I think Texas Joe will attest that it is NOT a sedative, you do NOT fall asleep all the time when taking it or otherwise behave more weirdly than you already are. It's just a reassurance. Try it, moorsb.
moorsb--only just got back here. Glad you'll be checking with the Dr. for her. My personal experience was with Welbutrin, but my DH's condition is such that we've used Thorazine for a long time. Then had to replace it--tried Serequel, Zyprexia, and Risperdal, before ending up with Geodon. Because we're also dealing with mental illness and learning disabilities this is a real roller-coaster ride for us to find what will work for him. Some meds worked the opposite to the way they do for most people. Her Dr. will know the best choice or choices to work from. Just remember, they take a bit of time to get into the system, and dosages may need adjusting for optimum result---but wel worth it to give her sme peace.
It seems that 50 mg of Zoloft is enough for my dh. It has helped with the depression and anger. Even before the EOAD he was a real easy going person. Now it is so funny to see when he gets the giggles. Even tho I said his emotions are affected he still has his ability to crack jokes and make people laugh. Sure the reasons they laught now may be different than what he thinks but he is happy so to heck with anyone else. He giggles at the simplest things. And at the strangest times. In his own way he is helping us make it on those horrible days by being able to find something funny around him. Thank God because when he is upset it is not always a pretty sight. Thanks for letting me talk.........
I'm curious about different types of Seroquel ....G takes 50 mg of Seroquel XR (timed release) at night and 50 mg of plain in the morning. He is so wiped out in the morning, I wonder if a timed release would be better? Any one have experience with this? Of course, at this point he is awful 24/7 in attitude, so it may not make a difference. I'm in the silent screaming mode now. Away...just want to be away.
kathi37===Have you talked to his Dr. lately? Med adjustments may be in order for both the "wiped out in the morning" and the attitude issues. Worth a call.
Moorsb - My husband would cry a lot in stage 5. Anti-depressents helped him. You might want to get hold of her doctor and update him on what she is doing.
Kathi37 - My husbands meds are being adjusted. He was taking Seroquel in the evening but ended up all night long. They changed his meds and dosage. Now they start giving him it at 1:00 in the afternoon. I suggest you talk with his doctor.
We have a Doc appt next week and surely will go over the meds..he has been Mr.Nasty for this past week..great with his caregiver and others, but pretty dreadful with me. I truly dislike roller coaster rides.
I think my DH is not fully aware of what it means to have Alzheimers. He's been told..rejects the entire notion..has been angry that anyone would tell him such a thing..and its not his problem.. its others who are trying to manipulate him, take his money or possessions etc.
Thank the LORD for Risperidol. Thats all I can say AND I keep one pill in reserve if he gets on a tangent. Right now he can't follow or reason through some of his brother's family estate planning..he assumes its about having something taken away from HIM, when the subject is not even about him. This was yesterday afternoon.. and this morning if he's still chewing and chewing about those thoughts..he'll have to have that third pill. I think this is the first time that his brother finally has understood how complex this disease can be. These lessons come mighty hard sometime. Leaves everyone else reeling while DH is on his own page and no amount of reasoning or explaining makes a difference.
Moosb, Kathryn has has been crying more lately. Doesn't get too upset lately however. When she does say something about not being able to do something I tell her it is ok and that she doesn't need to because she is my princess and I am there to see to her needs. She smiles really big and now says to me "I kind of like this" I guess that is why you drive me everywhere too. I tell it is and her wish is my command. She does still cry but it seems to help her move on. The other thing I have noticed is that she crys more watching TV. I think that her emotions are very senitive about things and she lets them out more.
Taking me back to what I consider the worst part of our journey..... when Lynn did know something was desperately wrong with him. God that was just a horrific time. He too was very depressed and for the first time in my life I saw him break down and cry, many many times. accccck. Now Lynn has no idea about most things, it is tragic... but also a blessing. I am so sorry your wife is experiencing this as well. I hope you will be able to find a way to help her through this period. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers ♥
I agree Nikki that was a horrific time. DH would cry and say he didn't know what was wrong because he never use to be like that. I would just sit close and tell him that I would be there when he couldn't remember . I don't know how many times when we had company he would look at me during a conversation and with his eyes ask "Is that right?" I would nod and he'd sit back again. It is so hard to watch this.
I just wish this phase was over. She is doing less things for herself and she does not want to be dependant on me. She has not driven a car in a year. now I have to fasten her seat belt for her.
All these comments sound so familiar. We've gone through most of them. But, for now, things have settled down to a more manageable state. But, he doesn't realize there is anything wrong with him. He just wants to do things the way he wants to do them, and I've had to learn to just go along. There are those times,though, when I feel so overwhelmed and so sad and so very alone, because, no matter what, others simply do not understand what going through this is really like (except, of course, the people here).
Oh Bev, I've felt that way so many times and agree that others just don't understand. They think they do, which just makes it harder. Sometimes it's just the little things that can get you down. I recently had to accept that when I point to something he can't make the connection with the pointing and what I'm pointing at, so that's just one more seemingly small thing that doesn't work anymore. I think that sometimes the little things just pile up to thepoint where I'm feeling being emotionally overwhelmed. Then I just drift into the New Reality and am ok til the next time it happens.
As PrisR said we often,sadly, realize something else has been lost. My husband cannot follow my pointing, or any directions to get something. The neurologist tried the Exelon patch for 3 months--no help. Back on Aricept and Namenda but going downhill faster than last year. In our 4-room apartment he asks me where the kitchen is. {He found it last night--this morning 6 bananas had been eaten.}
The newest problems: he keeps putting things away and has no memory of where they are. I have been keeping the car keys locked away (he has not driven for about 5 years), and the apartment keys are hidden. I spend a lot of time hunting for things. Right now he can't find his favorite pair of shoes.
Instead of being cold, my DH is hot. Twice last night I woke up shivering and found the thermostat on 50 degrees.
Wonder what surprise today or tomorrow will bring.