I am 60 years old and a new member. My husband is 86 and has Mixed Demenita for about 5 years now. As best as I can tell he is in the middle late stage. I find it so difficult to keep answering the same question all day long. This is just one of many problems that I am dealing with. Any suggestions to get them to stop repeating over and over?
Lily unfortunately repeating the same thing over and over is part of the disease. If they could remember they wouldn't be repeating. Count to 10 and answer. Getting yourself upset won't make things easier for either or you.
Welcome, Lily. I am so sorry you have to be here, but it's a great place to ask questions, rant, rave and vent when needed! My DH is also 86 (I'm 70). The repeating is part of the dementia - and usually a big part. there is no way to get them to stop repeating over and over. You just have to learn to have patience with him and just answer the question again or divert him to something else.
Come back often and tell us more about you and your husband.
Lily--I brought an old thread on questions to the top for you. One thing I do (just to entertain myself) is to see how many different ways I can answer the same questions. It's not as boring as giving the same answer over and over.
marilyn - interesting approach to it. How would you react if by chance he should remember your previous answer? :-)
Lily, I have been putting up with the repeating for a couple years, the last year has been the worse. My hb is 62 with EOAD. As you read here you will find that we all get frustrated and loose it at one time or another. For me, the most frustration is he will repeat then suddenly he remembers what he had been told. I guess we should try to be thankful they are at least talking to us..
Welcome to my website. You have come to a place of comfort for spouses who are trying to cope with the Alzheimer's/dementia of their husband/wife. The issues we face in dealing with a spouse with this disease are so different from the issues faced by children and grandchildren caregivers. We discuss all of those issues here - loss of intimacy; social contact; conversation; anger; resentment; stress; and pain of living with the stranger that Alzheimer's Disease has put in place of our beloved spouse.
The message boards are only part of this website. Please be sure to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read all of the resources on the left side. I recommend starting with "Newly Diagnosed/New Member" and "Understanding the Dementia Experience".
Do not miss the "previous blog" section. It is there you will find a huge array of topics with which you can relate. And now, there is a great new "search" feature on the home page, just under "previous blogs" on the left side. If you type in "repeating questions" in the "search" box, a list of blogs will come up related to that subject.
To answer your question about repeated questions - HUMOR. After 2 years of frustration, now I (most of the time) try to find humor in it. Check out this blog - http://www.thealzheimerspouse.com/groundhogday.htm
Log onto the home page daily for new blogs; news updates; important information.
Hi Lily, welcome. We have to remember that our LOs do not know that they are repeating the questions. I agree with Vicki, try to make it as easy for you as possible. I sometimes let my DH know what a great question he has come up with. You can answer the question or, it is sometimes easy to redirect the conversation if you really don't want to answer it again. Keep coming back and let us know more about you and your DH.
Welcome to the site. It's a great place to come to vent or just get some needed support. My husband repeats everything constantly. For instance, just today he asked where we are going and I told him Target. In less than 10 minutes he had asked where we were going at least 20 times and each time I answered him it was as if he had asked the question the very first time. Also he pretty much has the same routine everyday. But each day he tells me multiple times that he will take his two pills at 7:00 and have his little bag of m&ms at 8:00. (as if I could forget)
I know its aggravating and yes, sometimes I get tired of answering. But he really doesn't realize he has already asked the question. I know it will pass, but I also know that in the future as he progresses I will miss this questioning. That's the only way I don't go crazy....
Charlotte--My husband's short term memory is such that he has yet to remember the prior answers. Also, as Joan said, I use humor in my responses. Thankfully, he can still tell when I'm joking and jokes with me as well.
We live in a retirement home. Last evening at dinner we ate with a delightful new couple--turned out we went to the same high school and college. My DH wanted to talk--so he told the exact same story five times. Guess this is the stage that coincides with the questioning. No way to stop him as short term memory is nonexistent. Long time memory not so good either--he is beginning to forget our grown children. They do not live in this area, and when they visited for the Holidays he kept asking me who they were. He sometimes talks about his parents as though they are still alive. They have been gone 40/50 years.
Now hiding the car keys because he told me he had been out with the car to check on his parents. He has not driven for 5 years. I have noise maker on the door so I knew he had not even been outside.
Welcome Lily! You have landed in a wonderful little community here. We try our best to listen, advise, laugh, cry and support each other as best we can, each day. As far as the repeating, I'm with Moorsb, as the kids say, Take a chill pill or chillax, lol! Sometimes that is ALL you can do. Hang in there, remember we are all in this together.