It's been a long time since I have posted, sort of went into a deep hole for awhile, and couldn't find my way out. This is just sort of FYI, since there isn't an answer or anything anyone could do. Recently DMV got the report from the doctor, stating that they felt after DH's last appointment, that he should not be driving. When we had the appointment at the Alzheimer's Center, as usual one of the psychologists takes me into a room, and talks to me about changes I've seen etc. Well, somehow everything I said about DH, which by the way was very personal and degrading for him, was put into the report to DMV, and then when DMV called to have an interview over the phone, she proceeded to READ all the comments written. Her words were, well, your wife said...and your wife said.... and...well you can imagine how my DH felt. It was so awful and caused such a problem. I called the DR's office, and chewed them out, and called DMV and chewed them out. DMV said, well he has a right to know what is written in is report. I said those things were what I said, in private to a DR, and should not have been repeated...what about the HIPPA law or whatever it is....I am so frustrated I want to scream, so here I am venting...thanks!
I can certainly understand that you feel violated. Anyone would. I am wondering if there is an exception to the HIPPA law that a doctor must report something that he feels could be a danger to others, in this case your husband driving. Seems to me the DMV should have handled it differently. A simple statement that your doctor feels your health at this time precludes your ability to drive. I am sorry to hear you and your husband had to experience this lack of sensitivity. I would write a letter to the highest person I could find at that DMV & continue to rant until you receive an explanation that makes sense.
Mimi, I'm so sorry to hear what happened; apparently DMV are completely ignorant about dealing with dementia patients. They need to learn!
Will your dh forget what has happened? Just hopeful thinking, because I think mine would. He seems to forget -- and did this even in an earlier stage -- things I had to say to the neuro in his presence. And now, every day-care morning I climb into the van with him as if I'm going along and then hop out before they leave, thus betraying him utterly, but by the time he gets home he has forgotten and forgiven. If he sometimes remembers, he blames the driver for not letting me come along.
Mimi - what an awful chain of events. There are laws depending on the state where the doctor must notify DMV if they feel a person should no longer be driving. The doctor was probably meeting that - however, the doctor as Kitty says, the doctor did not need to be that specific nor did DMV.
As far as his remembering, they tend to remember and relive high intensity emotional events a lot longer than other things. Good luck on that.
Kitty is also right in that writing a letter - if we don't stand up for our loved ones rights and push, noone else will.
i would also be shocked and peeved that the dr didnt keep what i told him confidential- i would think he would notify the DMV that from his professional point of view the spouse was not able to continue driving due to progressive dementia etc. or along those lines. relaying verbatim what you told him to the DMV seems out of line to me and actions like that in my book would be breach of confidentiality. HIS OPINION is whats necessary to impede driving by the DMV and not yours.. the medical records would reflect what you said in privacy but should stay there - thats my own opinion - and i would question the drs actions at my next visit. divvi
HORRIBLE! I'd be furious, also. No details need to or should have been given to hb other than your doctor believes it is time for you to stop driving because of reaction time, cognition of possible dangerous situations, etc. I don't think the Dr. needs to be that specific to DMV, either. In our case, hb took a test (no driving) and failed. Results sent to doctor, she contacted DMV, they sent a form to be completed and returned, and that was that. I'd pursue the issue--unless that's more unnerving than trying to forget it.
I expressed extreme concern for a demented couple who live across the street from me. The community manager who I spoke to repeated my words back to them. Things are worse, nothing has been done for them and I can not longer watch out for them. It's a shame some common sense doesn't come into play with communication.
mimiS, speaking as a doctor it seems to me that there was a severe breach of confidentiality. I have filled out many forms for DMV. All they ask is for the diagnosis and whether the condition is stable, improved, or worsening, and an indication about driving ability. After the DMV gets the form they contact the patient to take a written and road test. It is then up to DMV to decide whether or not the person should drive. Unfortunately, sometimes the DMV exam does not pick up the judgement problems that we encounter in being the caregiver. I don't know who you complain to, but I feel you should let someone in both the doctor's office and DMV know that you are VERY upset by this breach.
Another indication of how little the public knows about AD. In CA docs are required to report such patients to the DMV, we had no such problems when DH was reported. I was not allowed in the room w/DH when he was at the DMV, but it was all done very carefully--and DH was willing to stop driving!!! He knew he was a risk. It should be reported so that the DMV tells their people what not to do, it shouldn't happen to anyone. Sorry it happened to you, mimi, I'd be very upset, very.
Mimi, I would write letters to the head of the DMV and to the state medical board if it happened to me and my husband. They need to know what happened to you in order for you to receive the apologies you deserve and to ensure that this doesn't happen to others. The others gave you very good advice as well. I'm more a bulldog and go for the source! <grin>
Like the others said, I hope he forgets this matter soon, and you can get past it.
YES folly* it is time for a slap fest......And it should begin with the doctor. They need to learn how to handle their own actions when dealing with patients and their care. It is a case of doing unto others as you would have them do unto you. Maybe the dr. should be asked if they would like their business on the street with as much care and concern as they gave you and your dh. Sorry if I am sounding harsh, but we all have enough to handle without everyone else chipping in making things rough for us. Yes, I am having a horrible day and this post just makes me angry at all the crap the world gives out without even thinking about what they are doing. Good luck with any action that you choose to take.
I don't really think it is just a lack of knowledge about AD, but a lack of concern for our fellow man that makes people act the way they do. If they were the ones being treated negatively they may think twice.
mimiS,for what it's worth, I had something similar happen about 4 years ago, and I reported it as a breach of patient confidentiality to the College of Physicians and Surgeons of British Columbia. The college investigated the matter, and the doctor denied having made the statements. It was his word against the other person's, and the College did not press further. I know the sense of fury, vulnerability and helplessness.
mimiS---As marsh indicated, I too believe there was a gross violation of confidentiality. As Mary said, I also agree, you should write a letter to the State Medical Board and the head of the DMV, with a cc: to the Dr. In it I would clearly state that since the report required by the DMV requires the Dr.'s medical assessment of your DH's condition as it relate to his continued driving, the privacy law was violated by providing informaton gleaned from you--verbatim. This can be verified but the report, as otherwise how could the representative from the DMV have reported that informaton to your DH--verbatim? Further, the representative of the DMV needs, at minimum, sensitivity training in handling such cases, or perhaps a transfer to another area, where less sensitive matters are handled. There was no need to report to your husband every comment, as quoted, and it was not the representative's place to determine his right to know every word, in a phone call. If he'd been there in person and asked to see the report, that might have been a different matter. Then, I'd close with the expectation that the matter will be addressed and corrections made in the handling of such information, so others do not suffer repercussions, like you are now dealing with because of your DH's dementia.
Keep a copy of your letter. Also, if you're really, peeved, check with the State Medical Board on the requirements and/or methods of filing suite as relates HIPPA violaions. A phone call should probably tell you that.
I had talked this over with Eric's General Practitioner before reporting the incident to the College of Physicians and Surgeons of B.C. (it was the Geriatrist that I was reporting). The G.P. told me that unless a patient waives confidentiality, doctors may not discuss their patients with anyone (except, I would think, other doctors who are involved with said patient's care).
Somthing said on another thread got me thinking in relation to this issue. It also sounds to me like DMV needs some training on how to handle a sensitive subject like "no more driving" with people. I wonder how many people let the people at DMV handle the difficult issue of telling someone that they should no longer drive and how many of those do a lot of yelling and other poor behaviors.
I'm just going to second carosi. This is a HIPPA violation. When my husband's doctor reported my husband to the DMV, all he told them was dementia and that my husband could no longer drive in his opinion (actually her's since it was the PA who did the reporting). They sent a letter to our home offering a test. I called and told them that I agreed with the doctor and the DMV officer told us how to turn the license in and get a free ID card in its place.
Honest. What mimiS experienced is NOT normal procedure, and it is NOT common.
Here, here to all the comments. There really can be no excuse for sending any specific conversation or who said what to the DMV. I am sooooo sorry that this happened to you mimi. I cannot fathom why your husbands Dr. chose to step so far out of bounds here. I hope that your husband can understand that, your comments were meant to keep him and others safe and you in no way meant for this to happen. Hugs, Susan