Dear Lord--I need You to give me patience but I want it RIGHT NOW! (smile) Seriously, though, patience is the biggie. Sometimes you just have to walk away--go into another room, mop a floor, do anything to break the pattern. You'll both be better off. Don't I sound like I really know what I'm talking about. :)_
Bama, I took touch typing as a young sprite, and got pretty fast. Usually, posting is no big deal. But now, with a kitten firmly attached to one arm most of the time when I'm on the computer, I'm reduced to trying to do everything with one hand ...
Thank you, Sunshyne. I can't even program a VCR. About a year ago I decided I needed to stretch my mind. I knew staying home all the time was going to drive me up a wall so I headed to our OfficeMax and bought a computer. The Comission on Aging was offering a six weeks program on simple computer skills so I signed up. It was the best thing I could have done for ME. With a little help from Windows Vista for Dummies I am doing quite well. My computer using children are proud of me. They have come to me once in awhile for advice with their problems which makes me happy. Computer problems... not relationship problems. I am still an old fogey in that department.
Sunshyne, you are having too much fun with those kittens! I am so glad that they are bringing you so much pleasure!
Bama, I'm proud of you! It takes intestinal fortitude to buy a computer and then take lessons on how to use it! If you can do that, you can do most everything!
briegull, when I die, no one in my house will know how to program the VCR, DVD, DVR, Harmony One Remote, or computer. They can set the alarm clock, microwave clock, and coffee pot clock. <grin>
Hello all. I am glad to see the strike didn't last too long, but very glad to see some new names. I am in Hillsville, VA in a coffee shop with a free computer, 5 hours away from home. I came for my best friend's father's funeral the day after the "strike began" and will return tomorrow. I'm in the middle of nowhere in a very quaint rural area. Quite a change from the norm. Just had to check in to see how things were going.
Hey All Newbies!!!!! (I include myself) Post and learn. We need good soldiers in our Dementia Tunnel to give us CPR. It's scary to start, I know and have said so a few times. It was scary for me because it was like airing my dirty laundry. We were all told not to do that in our youth, weren't we? But here, I felt comfortable after a little while and knew that someone would understand. I am finding that you all are my friends and compatriats. What a relief! I could finally let it out without regret...... I am so glad that the strike didn't last long.
I am NOT venting about my hubby but about his priest ( I attend a different faith/church)--but hubby in the stages (3) had a issue last week where he threathend to kill me...priest said he'd hold the guns. Yesterday afte visiting with hubby's psycho. guy with a "mild cognitive impairment" (hubby wasnt present during this apt.)---psychol. guy yesterday "no guns"'''--- now the priest is saying..."if .....wants the guns back I can do....this and that ...but he really should have his guns back>" Can I get this in writing (the priest said)--Yikes, is it me or is this so called priest out of lunch?????
Ive never heard of a priest getting involved in holding someones weapons for them. that seems very strange to me..i would find someone else to hold them til you can work on this more if hes thinking of returned the weapons to husband-since you were threatened you should file a police report if anything happens again. then the police will have to do something. divvi
It's an "Russian Orthodox Priest"----I will get a doctor's order...it just seemed stranged that the so called priest would changelled me...it's almost like he's questioning my sanity instead of hubbys judgement....remember divvi how convincing they can be in the early stages....I cried myself because it's like everyone thinks I am the MONSTER. thanks for venting
Lullie-- Definitely get the guns under lock and key, off the premises. I had to do that before my DH could come home from the hospital. His shotgun and my daughter's BB pistol are locked up at my sister's house and trhe ammo (old) was disposed of. He hasn't even asked about them since he came home (2006). Never heard of any clergyman (unless a relative) even offering to help intervene like this one. Generally stick to behavior, lifestyle, and faith issues.
this was the thread when the Dirty Dozen decided to strike due to non postings!! wheres bluedaze, aka cracked egg, guess no longer without the cast) imohr, nancy b is now a member she posts all day like me,:) marsh is on/off, sunshyne has gone over to the other side i think, they must be singing her praises with her research over there:) mary aka red was outta commisions with puter issues dont know whats up with her-kitty on at nite for a bit..
its amazing that with SOOO MANY new members all the time, nobody is posting much again. i am gonna do the strike thingey again.. like anyone would care or not...but last time it brought a couple of days of fast and furious posters out of the woodwork.
any takers beside me??? even in the pm when folks are home seems tobe less nowdays..boring!!!!!!!!!! DIVVI AKA 5*General of the Poop brigage and dirty dozen.
as soon as you read this post, give your signal you are 'off' -yeah lurking is permitted but not for 24hrs. that means til tomorrow nite at 7pm central. and i WILL do it this time..ok, signing off..seeya friends. DIVVI
Divvi--Thanks so much for bringing back this thread. I had never read it before and really enjoyed looking at it this evening. Besides seeing the origin of the "dirty dozen", I was also reminded by someone (sorry, forgot who) to use the child lock feature on my fridge--to lock DH out from using the ice/water dispensers. Good idea.
I can't believe that no one teased Mawzy for saying she was going to to Human (sic) Society to get a pet. The first thing I thougt of was that she would be adopting a forlorn person to bring home; instead she acquired Noche, which I had never realized was named night in Spanish.
I was also reminded to be thankful that my DH is not causing a much havoc around the house as in earlier times. I hadn't ever focused on this before--the up side of his doing less for himself is that he doesn't create the chaos that used to be a daily occurrence here. I used to always be waiting for the other shoe to drop--there is more peace in my life now. This has been a difficult week so far, and reading this thread has helped my outlook.
I'm having a "poor little me" day. But if we're forming a club, I wanna be in it. Puleeeeze.
I couldn't believe there was a new thread with 279 postings. Thought I was hallucinating! I look at the web site all the time hoping that someone has written something. Do you know that everyone goes to bed at 9:00 P M Central Time. Never postings after that. ME? I'm up till 11.... booooring.
I had two doctors appointments today. ONe with his clinical psychologist who told me that I had taken care of him at least a year longer than anyone else has ever done with spouses at his stage with his problems. Funny, how different they are to all of yours. Yours always sound so much worse. I was awake with him last night from 12:30 until 5 AM and then he slept till noon, ate breakfast, slept all afternoon according to my housekeeper while I was at the doctors appts., and then when I came in, he went from his chair to the bed and wouldn't get up for dinner until 9:00 in spite of my prodding. (Choose your battles, NancyB). I know he will be up all night tonight again.
My ejection fraction is way low again..in the upper 20's percentile.. It's scary. I was up to 50% I will let it go at that.
Second appointment was with my back doctor and I have a disc problem in my upper back. I didn't know that being 70 was going to be such a challenge.
So, I deserve to be in the Dirty Dozen...but someone needs to say up later beside me. What happens to the West Coasters...they could be up late(and not even know it!!. .. :-) get it????..I crack me up! ..haha.
I've been so busy I missed the strike....didn't know one was called until a few minutes ago and saw some angry discussions.....I answered them before I just found this!!!!
We who are in the Dirty Dozen have spouses that are in or close to stage 7 and have been here for more than two years. We are like family but we adopt new members with open arms!!!
We joke and kid and that is as helpful to us as advice sometimes. If I can't laugh, I'll cry....we are here to find help, support and answers when we have need of them. We have become very close friends - and become family. I treasure my relationships with the members here, and not just the Dirty Dozen.
My husband seems to be getting worse these last two days. He's been sick and agitated, and I can't figure out why....no new food, and no new drugs. Just AD taking him down. So my emotions right now are raw. I need a hug...BADLY!
However, Nancy needs one, and Nikki, and Shellseeker, and Bluedaze, and Imohr, and briegull, and Sunshine, and Starling, and Marsh, and Baltobob, and GC, and JOAN, and several others of you - I can't name everyone, but you know who you are!!! ((((((HUGS TO ALL))))))
and (((*(hugs to you)))), my dear friend. I wonder what's got into your husband right now!
This is my day to scream at mine - he's lost his cane yet again, and I have a bum knee (water on the knee and it sometimes swells and gives me trouble) so I don't want to hobble around to find it. I give him the walker (too big to lose) but he doesn't like it so then he starts crawling along the walls, tables, counters, etc, endangering any number of things including himself. I'll give him a different cane from our supply, but he doesn't LIKE it!
I felt that warm hug, Mary, and a bigger one back to you -- and to everyone who needs one -- which probably includes all of us. Yesterday I was re-reading "Games People Play" by Dr. Eric Berne, looking for the place where he talks about how we all need "stroking" every day or else our spinal cords might shrivel up.
We "oldies" need support, too. JUst because we've been on this train to hell for so long and try to help "newbies" as they come along doesn't mean we don't need support. We need fresh insights to keep the site active.
Full moon isn't until the 9th, a week away. So probably not what's bothering Mary's husband, but thanks for bringing the subject up, Charlotte, so we're all warned in advance!!!
Mary, have you had him checked for a UTI? When the moon isn't to blame, a UTI usually is. Either that, or dehydration.
As a newbie to posting but a lurker for many months....thank you all "senior" posters for making our journey easier because of your insight and compassion. HUGE HUGS! When I feel I am at a new stage with my husband, or just frustrated know I can come here and not only get information but sense a virtual hug.
Sunshyne, as always, points out issues to be checked for increased confusion. UTI usually does it! As a nurse remember how we dreaded the full moon! Could always count on a fun filled night with patients.
scs from your post I gather that you, too are a nurse. Even as a nursing coordinator for home health I did not recognize that the terrible rages my husband was exibiting was a symptom of FTD (remember when that meant flowers). No way was I prepared for the road to purgatory. By the way-Sunshyne wants to know if you have any cats :-)
I'm screaming inside...can't communicate with any friends or family over this sh##! So...this is a major VENT episode..no sense describing the situation as others have the same or worse, but I need to let steam off or I will explode. ARG!!!!!! He will waken in the morning as though he hasn't done a bloody thing wrong, while I will be awake most of the night. I want to just go away!
Oh, Kathi37--I'm really sorry you are having such a rough time. And, I'm really glad you were confident enough to vent here. I've done it. And, it really helps.
I've heard it said that when you get really frustrated and don't let it out, it's like a boiling tea kettle. If it isn't vented, the steam will blow the lid right off. And, heaven knows where it will land or on whom it will land.
Hope you are able to get some rest tonight. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day. I really don't want that to sound like a platiltude. Forgive me if it does.
Blessings! We all need an extra one frequently it seems.
Kathi, you have every right to vent and this is just the place to do it. I've read postings ranging from planning to run away from home never to return, to asking if caregiver stress was justifiable homicide. Before I found this site, I drove my children crazy with my venting calls and they never truly "got it".... I thought. Now, they are spared and our friends here do "get it" and are such support.
My husband has been diagnosed for about five years but the disease has been coming on for about 10 years as we look back. He's in the Severe Stage, but is not bedridden. In fact, he slipped away tonight and the neighbors had to bring him home.
Just scream, yell and get it out on this site...and know that we are here for you, we'll support you and give you as much encouragement as we can. "Why is this happening to me?" is a valid question we have all asked. There is no answer.
Kathi, vent away, say whatever you need to , we all listen and try to comfort, support,and love. this site is the best place I have found without it I would be totaly lost, so go ahead scream,yell,cry whatever you need to do
Kathi, this is the place to get everything off your chest! Let it fly!!! We're here to catch it, agree with you and give you a hug!!!!
There are several posts where we are running away from it all....we have cabins in Maine and Oregon, I think...we have a cruise ship....we have a leaky boat...our imaginations together help us cope with today...
Thank you one and all...however, I was wrong about everything being copasetic in the morning. First thing, he says he is going to shut the water to the outside off so we don't spring a leak!!! He created a huge problem earlier this year by screwing around with faucets, and just knows it is going to leak downstairs again...more ARG!!! Oh well...thanks again.