I've just been packing for our trip to Italy, and I went to get clothing from OH's wardrobe. I found that for about the last ten days, he's been taking off his dirty clothing, and hiding it under his clean, pressed clothing. He never did anything like this before...
Has anyone else experienced this...??? Is it a sign of a further decline...?
well mine started moving all my clothes to another dresser in a differant bedroom lately,she tells me that the clothes are all from her two boys that used to live with us,hmmm lets see this is a new home an they have all been married for years,I ve read on differant threads here what your going thru so its not unusual
Lynne, as you have time, read old posts, try the story of the Traveling Pants, and you will LOL at the places spouses have "hid"things. Arms around, Susan
Yes. Yes. I have increasingly had to attend to where Jeff's clothes are kept. He now takes off worn items, balls them up, and puts them in drawers at random. It's a good idea if--on laundry day--I go through most of his stuff, and pull out things that look balled up. I'm really bad at laundry. What I mean by that is, I hate it, but mostly the putting away part. Hence, things come up from the basement laundry in baskets, and eventually I get around to putting it away, but for quite a while I rummage for things out of baskets. I think it's time to sharpen my habits a bit, as Jeff's get worse, because he can go for days on end putting on the same clothes. Eventually I try to catch the dirties as he sheds them, and put them out of sight, in the hamper.
Glad I'm not alone in this... I'll look out the 'traveling pants'. The title is funny in itself...!!
Emily, Ian balls dirty clothes up too, and then hides them. Before he got sick he would always use the laundry basket, but not now...What stage is Jeff.... Ian is 3-4 but I think some days he teeters towards 4-5
Lynne, hoarding and hiding anything and everything from napkins to medicines, is another common trait of AD. there is no common demominator as to what they find to hoard/hide except alot of us find dirty clothing is exceptionally a common one. at least be gratful for now anyway that he is CHANGING clothing and not giving you issues on taking his dirty clothes away (yet:) we become accustomed to altering our cleaning patterns and so must check now for dirty clothes back in clean drawers:) chastizing for doing it does no good they will do it again and forget to put it in the dirty laundry.. its quirky but many do it so dont worry its not just him. hope your trip is lovely and goes off without any serious glitches! divvi
On the right side of the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - I have put up a link to the book - "Ice Cream in the Cupboard" by Pat Moffet. It is the story of his journey through Early Onset Alzheimer's Disease with his wife. You may be interested in reading it. Just click on the link for story synopsis and ordering information.
The more you come here, the more you will learn that, no matter how strange you think your question, someone else has probably experienced it, and can offer advice. And if you're the first with a new problem - we'll learn from you.
yes my dh would put things in strange places, milk under the sink and I discovered it a while later, wondered where the smell came from, dirty clothes in the drawers too,alot of times he would come out of the bathroom with my shirt on , tried my pants a couple of time, clothes on top of clothes, he even did the underware over the pants, must say it was funny. Gail
We look for things every day. Recently in the middle of a search for his cell phone, he said, "Oh, i remember where i put it", went to the refrigerator and there it was!! Ya gotta laugh!!
And spoons under his chest of drawers! He keeps wanting to hide his coffee cup, but I keep detouring him to the sink...I am sure one of these days it will come up missing.
Thanks Joan, I'll take a look at that. It sounds as though it could be useful.
There are some funny stories on here. I guess we have to take our laughter where we can. We're all in this journey together, and although it's sad, if something funny does happen, it's good to share it so others can at least smile.
Ian's mental health nurse always tells me to give him small tasks to do, so he can feel useful. One of his daily chores, is emptying the rubbish bin/trash can in the kitchen, taking it to the outside bin, and replacing the liner in the kitchen bin.
Today, the liners disappeared. I hunted all over the house for them. Ian blamed a workman, who was recently in the house doing some decorating. I believed Ian at first, and then I thought 'but why would the decorator take our bin liners..?'
This afternoon, when I was looking for Ian's cuff links and evening watch (ready to pack for Italy), I found the bin liners in his bedside cabinet.....!! Next to his expensive watch...!
Ian obviously decided this was a good place for the liners...forgot all about it, and blamed the poor decorator....!!!
We search for his dark glasses everyday. he had 2 cornea transplants and the light bothers him, we have at least 6 pairs of dark glasses. today I found 2.... where are the rest? Oh of course, let me look in the refrigerator. I hadn't thought of that. (grin)
Bluedaze...he does a have an 'everyday' watch. I guess the expensive one may have to 'go missing' for its own safety. Heaven knows, he loses enough things.... I
I have to admit that not one of these posts has not occurred in our house. Ice Cream in the cupboard, milk in the pantry, hidden dirty clothes ..even out in the garage.. Did anyone find mail in an out of the way drawer? I found an entire stash of mail from April, May and on..in a bottom drawer in a chest in the dining room...I only open when using the "fancy eating table" as my sons call it.
If I do not watch him, he will don underwear from the dirty clothes hamper. I have to rush to empty it every morning before he dresses.
Oh yes, Lynne, this is indeed an Alzheimer's trait..and until we have to dress them, they will continue to favor the clothes they wore yesterday.- if we can get them off of them the night before. Recently, my husband slept the night in his Florsheim dress shoes. I have found that I cannot top anyone in "what they do". Someone else did the very same thing before.
I wonder if there is a manual that pops into their brain when they get Alzheimers that outlines these things...since they DO all do the same thing. Just too odd.
My husband will wear the same jeans and socks everyday if I don't get them and put them in the hamper and lay out a clean pair. One the other hand he will change his shirt 2-3 times a day because he got tired of the shirt he has on. I truly don't understand how their minds work.
My dh has had the same pair of underwear on for days now. He just gets up in the morning, and puts on the same clothes from the day before. Day after day. And he hasn't even been dx yet!
DH sleeps in is underpants so the only way he will put clean ones on is on the (increasingly rare) moments when he's in the shower and I sneak into the bathroom and quietly replace the dirtly ones (neatly folded on the edge of the sink) with a clean pair. It's par for the course. I can only get him to take a shower by saying I won't go bicycling with him otherwise. Fortunately (???) it's getting easier to get him to put a clean shirt on because he's been getting more spots on his shirts. There is only one pair of short pants that he likes and will wear, so I have to wash them after he goes to bed and dry them as soon as possible in the morning.
Every other day while we are enjoying our coffee in bed before getting up, I'll tell DH that while he is taking a shower (hint, hint), I'll pick out something really nice for him to wear today. He likes to look good but can't choose his clothing very well. So, for me this works - for now. If I didn't choose the clothing, he would wear the old jeans with paint all over them every day! He does forget to place the dirty clothes in the hamper, but will bring his wet towel to the washing machine! He does change his socks every day and will put them in the hamper. He always thanks me for choosing his outfit for the day! At night when he puts on his pj's, he will very carefully hang up his dirty clothes in the closet. No problem, I just go get them to put in the laundry.
Lynne--I had my husband's expensive watches done over to fit me and now I wear them. Since women wearing men's watches is actually in style now, it is "of the moment". I had the bracelet on one made smaller, the other, a tank watch, I replaced the black leather band with a white leather one. So I got two new beautiful watches for very little investment.
I've hidden his expensive watch.... I'll let you know if he notices.. I bet you he won't. I don't know if I'll have it made to fit me though. I'll wait and see how I feel about that.
On the clothing issue, Ian will wear torn or dirty garments and not even notice. I sometimes have to make him change as he's literally not fit to be seen in public with...
As for mail, that was one of the first things I noticed about 2 yrs ago before dx. I would receive red reminder bills threatening to cut off electricity etc... Then I would find the mail in strange places, such as kitchen drawers or in the bathroom cabinet....He would sometimes put it in a drawer unopened....
Lynne, if you read my earlier post, I have also lost bills and important mail, without knowing it. He's lost hearing aids (at $6000/pair) and other things, but the hiding mail was a surprise. I, too, would get a bill showing the past month's was not paid, and not have a clue how that happened. Now, I make certain to rush to the mailbox the minute the mailman comes by. If I am gone, I tell my housekeeper to get the mail for me and put it in my desk drawer. You can never predict what they will do next....nor will you ever understand why they do what they do. HIDING the mail.... why????
hey my LO hides her purse several times a day,claims folks are stealing hundreds from her,always counting whatever money she has,everyday its something new,the other night when leaving a restaurent she was walking behind a very ummm stout? woman, who was about 5'3 an about 300#s so LO starts swinging her hips in a very pronounced way,I was behind LO an couldn't figure out why all the people were laughing then I see the lady in front of her an wanted to crawl under the nearest table,this after she had eaten her meal with a spoon,when I asked her why she was using spoon she said cause I can't get enough on the damn knife,hmmm so much for that conversation
We went through a time of not changing clothes, sleeping in whatever he had on. That's over and we're changing our shirt many, many times a day--well several, anyway. I guess I can hide some of them so he'll "run out." I don't want to wash so many shirts. He doesn't actually have *that* many, anyway. Doesn't change pants that often, just shirts. Didn't want to mention the "shirt" event, but Deb mentioned it, and I thought, "Okay, this is another thing that's not uncommon." But, today he hung up a shirt he'd dropped some lunch on. Huh?
Don, you made me laugh out loud again. Hope I didn't wake up DH. He'll think it's morning and want to get up (it's midnight here). Nancy, maybe hiding the mail is a way of keeping it safe. (Like I do before I go on vacation and can't remember where it was when I got home. And I don't even have dementia (?)
I had to laugh when someone above commented that he's getting more food on his shirts now, so he changes them. My DH is also getting more food on his clothing, but he thinks it's ok to keep wearing them, because it's only a small spot. When I had my MIl home, I used to sneak into the room at night to get the dirty clothes. Unfortunately, DH doesn't take them off.... so that makes it harder. I don't understand he was always kind of a dandy about his appearance, with shirt and socks matching. Now.... I'm happy if he's clean, and yes, I pick out and lay out his clothing, or else, he'll just leave on whatever he slept in.
Now that it is Fall & cool in Indiana, I find that my husband has forgotten how to put on long pajamas's & jeans. This morning I gave him long jeans to wear, went to make his breakfast, came back into the bedroom & he was just sitting there looking at them. I helped him change into the jeans...most of the day, he would look down at his legs. This was no problem this summer, when he changed to shorts. Strange, how fast the forget from one season to the next.
All summer at night, DH wore winter pajamas, sweater, used a sheet, blanket and comforter; no a/c, no overhead fan could be used. He was always freezing. Now that the weather is cooler - and nice; he has gotten out his shortie p.j.'s, short sleeved shirt, uses only a sheet to cover and wants the a/c turned on! I sweated all summer long - now I'm freezing!! He doesn't have his days/nights mixed up - but does have his seasons reversed. LOL
No, Vickie, I know, DH, who was never cold before (he's a hot blooded italian) was suddenly freezing all summer. today, it was 54 degrees, and he was outside on the deck in his PJ's sweeping the leaves. Excuse me!!! It's freezing out, NO, I'm fine. All righty then.
When I asked him why he was cold all summer and hot now that it's cooler, he said : "I can't help it, my thermostat must be all mixed up". Yeah....sure is, but mine isn't! LOL
My DH keeps wanting to put all his clean clothes on the bed with him. He sleeps with them all over him and when I put them away the next thing I know they are out again strung all over the bed.
DH has three blue short-sleeved shirts and he has wanted to wear no others all summer long. After he's asleep I can exchange a clean one for the dirty one that he hangs on the chair, but he will be very upset if it's any other color. I never thought I'd be glad to see colder weather arrive . . .
This clothing thing is new here. G has been up for an hour and has changed his shirt four times already..why? There's a spot, too hot, don't want to wear it, etc. Beyond strange even for him.
Lynn: was wondering how your trip to Italy went.....what part of Italy did you visit...My Husband is from the Tuscany Area...been there many time....just love it...Rosalie
It's amazing how we've all learned to be creative in handling the dirty clothes situation. I wait until my husband has gone to bed and then I sneak into the den to take away his dirty clothes and replace with clean. The underwear is another situation. After I have convinced him that he DIDN'T just take a shower, I sneak into the bathroom and take away the dirty underware and leave clean.
So far his eating habits are still good. Aside from the ice cream fettish.
The mail started to cause a problem. He walk to the mailbox with the key (we live in a gated community for group mailboxes. He'd always leave it on the kitchen counter for me, but then he started to open it and I was afraid he'd lose something. So I hid the key. After searching for it for a while he finally gave up and now he forgotten about it. So picking up the mail on the way home from work was added to my list of responsibilities.
He did do something very wrong though. I had a stack of papers on the upstairs desk that he decided to rip into quarters and throw out. When I came home from work, Jack told me he had torn up some papers. I looked in the rubbish and found that it was the satisfied deed to the house, home and car insurance papers, etc. It took me six hours to piece and tape together, all the while crying and feeling sorry for myself. I also had to speak to Jack about being more aggressive and stopping him from doing something that was obviously wrong. I won't make the mistake of leaving papers around anymore that need to be filed.
Who knows what lies ahead. Yes, we have to find our humor where we can. Reading all these message boards has really been a help.