Years ago, my father in law had told he "show me a man who smiles constantly, and I'll show you an idiot.... Yep that was me. Over the years, I noticed that my smile disappeared, and varied to a frown, a look of disgust, and my lips drooped downwards. I started observing people in stores, looking at their faces, and no one smiled anymore. The old people has a mean look on their face, the middle age had the frowns and worried looks, teenagers looked like they spent too much time on video games, and the seven year olds looked frazzled. No one smiled anymore, except on rare occasions. I looked in the mirror, and was disappointed in my reflection, so I smiled....Immediately, I felt happy....I became alive..I forgot about eoad and the pains of being a caregiver. I am forcing myself to smile, and it is more therapeutic than any medication I can think of.....It is impossible to cry when you smile...believe me I tried it...the smile warms your soul and brings feelings of false happiness.....It erases the worries, forgives the anger, solves the frustration. I dare anyone to smile and tell me that it did not work. So put a conscious effort into smiling....and it becomes contagious...Try it for a week... I am confident that if you do not feel better, at least others will notice a change..
You are so right, phranque! I try to get DH to smile or laugh a lot during the day. Most of the time he will - and he feels so much better. Sometimes I try to get a really "belly laugh" out of him, and once I get him started, he just opens up! LOL It does make one feel better and also affects the people around you.
We use humor around here as much as possible. Many time when Jim forgets something (if he is in a good mood) I will say, "whats the matter, got dementia! and he laughs. I keep asking him if he likes to dance, he always says no. I tell him I'm waiting for the day he forgets that he doesn't and says YES! Then we can go dancing! LOL
My therapist, says, "fake it till you make it" in other words, smile!
We smile ALOT around here too & y'all are right! It just helps to make it through ~ And, we definitely DANCE! At least once or twice a day...Tickleing, laughing, hugging, etc...it's ALL a huge part of our day...and really if you can do all that, it does tend to make all the rest of it easier! We are blessed!!
I guess I tend to smile a lot. I always smile at anyone I make eye contact with in the grocery stores. They nearly always smile back, and sometimes take a minute to exchange a pleasant "hello". Makes me feel better and I do believe it lightens their day a bit also. I've not been aware of it, but I do try to make eye contact with people.
I'm also a bit of a pop-off. My kids have always enjoyed my sense of humor. When they were growing up they would bring their friends home to meet me, and say to me "Say something funny, Mom". Now if that isn't putting on the pressure I don't know what is!!! I can still make my DH smile and laugh with my antics, especially if there is music and I dance up to him (like I'm trying to seduce him, or something). Doesn't say much for my "seductive powers, now does it!! :-) Oh well.....
My mom always told me to try and keep a pleasant look on my face. She even insisted that when I answered the phone that I did so with a smile on my face. Even today, it's a habit.....answering the phone with a smile, that is....and people can tell. The person on the other end usually says something like Wow, you sound good! or, You sound so happy! Guess it works. If they only KNEW! Gmaewok....I always have had a unique sense of humor. I was always involved with scouting or some other youth activity when my kids were young. Once, I overheard one of my daughter's friends (around the corner in a hallway) tell her, "gee, your mom is so wierd". It made my daughter cry!! I asked her if I embarrassed her and fortunately, she said no. MY feelings were hurt, though! Everyone's a critic. Even at that tender age (Brownie girl scouts). Wish I felt like dancing up to my husband....he doesn't like my kind of music anyhow and don't think he'd understand my intent! Wonder if I still HAVE Seductive Powers??? Is that some kind of Super Power???? LOL (but sad, isn't it?)
"WHEN YOU FROWN, YOU FROWN ALL ALONE, BUT WHEN YOU SMILE, THE WHOLE WORLD SMILES WITH YOU."
Smiling is the primary sign of being HAPPY and I have said here before that keeping Carol HAPPY seems to be the most important thing around here. When she is smiling, everybody in the room is smiling. Babies really make her happy so I actually go to reslteraunts where there is best possibility to find some babies. They seem to know that they need to play peek a boo with Carol. Sometime the whole resteraunt is aware of what Carol is doing and you know what? It does not bother me a bit. Another one that seems to be needed here is "IF MOMMA AINT HAPPY, AINT NOBODY HAPY!!!!!"
I remember meeting the grandmother of the tiny baby we were adopting at the hospital. Her mouth turned down. I just consciously turned mine up! And I've tried to keep it up - it's amazing peoples' responses.
But: a friend of mine and I were in Paris. Riding the metro, she would smile and talk to everyone! Many did NOT know what to make of it. I challenged her to make eye contact and see if she could get anyone to smile without saying a word. And it couldn't be an American, either. That was too easy. FInally, several rides later, she got someone to smile back at her. But he was CANADIAN! The French just DO NOT SMILE at strangers!
Well I don't know about that, briegull, but the Dutch do. I've been trying this (especially on the Rotterdam metro but also on the people we pass when cycling. and in the restaurant tonight) and it works. Get lots of smiles back. It's fun too and improves my own mood.
People love it when you smile at their kids or dogs.
I was reminded of a saying I really liked that was occurring in those inspirational emails awhile back: "Always be kinder than you need to be. Everybody is fighting some sort of battle."
A Japanese rail firm is using a computer program to ensure that its staff is smiling broad enough at all times, according to the BBC.
Computerized scanners have been installed at 15 Tokyo rail stations to measure the curvature of the smile to make sure that it is wide enough, the story said. Because the Japanese reportedly place high value in customer service, those staff members who don't smile wide enough will be encouraged to be more cheerful.
Okay ya'll, get those smiles on or joang will have the Super Dooper Pooper Scooper Snot Swabbing Smile Meter zap us.
Anyone remember in 'Patch Adams' when Robin Williams did this experiment of smiling at people? He too found smiling causes others to smile, even some staunch frowners.
Myself.....I'm going outside to play with fire......turn on a torch and either make some kind of copper lawn sculpture or make some lampwork beads. Hope I don't catch fire, huh?
I have been thinking of this particular thread for days now & singing the following song...Thought y'all might like it too. I have listed the lyrics (they seem to fit us care-givers), but here's a link to hear the great Nat King Cole serenade you ~ It is beautiful!! I hope you are encouraged :) http://www.rhapsody.com/nat-king-cole/the-very-best-of-nat-king-cole/smile/lyrics.html
Smile, though your heart is aching. Smile, even though it's breaking. When there are clouds in the sky, You'll get by...
If you smile through your fear and sorrow, Smile and maybe tomorrow You'll see the sun come shining through for you.
Light up your face with gladness, Hide every trace of sadness. Although a tear may be ever so near.
That's the time you must keep on trying. Smile, what's the use of crying? You'll find that life is still worthwhile If you'll just smile.