I know that this has been discussed before but here is my story today.
With the stress of just everything and the stress of needing to keep my stories streight and just the stress of wondering what is going to happen next: i.e., mood, conversation, etc. It takes a toll on me. I am forgetful, say things either wrong or act like I don't know what I am talking about. Then DH immediately jumps on the chance to say something like "and you think I'm the one with problems." An example is when I try to keep a conversation from focusing on something that I had hoped he had forgotten or not noticed. He will ask me about it and I will "fog" the truth by saying that I don't remember or that I didn't recall the situation at all. Or, I will really not remember what he is talking about. Or, I will answer with the incorrect answer. All of these things make me look like I am the one with the problem.
I don't really need advice because I know that some of it can't be helped and the rest of it is because my brain is overloaded and I simply do not have the capacity to keep it all streight.
I would appreciate some thoughts and some stories from you all so that I don't feel like I am the only one experiencing this.
I just call DH to see what he is up to. this storm here has him really knocked down. Tired, achy, probably his eyes are red and glassed over. More than likely the full moon + some sun downing + what I call the x factor that they doctor can't find a reason for that makes him hurt all of the time. So here goes some more stress, will we have a calm evening or will something set him off and cause him to rant all night. It is so hard to avoid the stress.
Stress has been my number one enemy. Recalling and trying to re-enter my own life has been a factor in saving some of my sanity. Many times, when extraordinarily stressed, I can't remember phone numbers, names, FACES or conversations I've had with people. I can't keep up with some of the aides that come here to see my husband....sometimes its quite embarrassing. I've talked with my doc and psych. and know that my intellect is still intact.....assured it is "caregiver stress".
I, too. have caregiver stress. What Secret Squirrel said above really describes what I am worried about. I'm wondering whether when this is over, I'll come out of this ok.
Mary in Montana, it's that business of one brain trying to do all the thinking for two (or more) people. It's circuit overload. You have lots of company. (((hugs)))
Hanging On.....we WILL come out of the other end of this INTACT. BELIEVE IT. And don't let anyone else give you any .....um....."flack" about it, either.
You're not kidding any of us phranque! behind that funny demeanor you possess you have a strong mind and heart or you wouldnt be caring for 3 dependent folks. that takes more than brains. divvi
Actually, the more I think about it, it takes a total lack of brains.....but I guess you're right about the heart...Can I have a heart attack if my heart is too big???
Oh my goodness..no heart attacks for having big hearts.. but I've been thinking I don't make much sense to anyone either..and sometimes wonder if this stuff is 'catchable'. Overloaded circuits sound like a good way of describing.. I'm in the ballpark with you, Mary.
Mary in Montana, I'm really glad you started this thread. So glad to find I'm not alone in this. In my hurry to get out of the grocery store when DH is making a fuss I've been known to leave groceries behind or forget to return the cart and retrieve my coin. Small stuff, not to sweat. But the other day I was there alone and, all in a flutter to get home as usual, I tried to back through a pole and banged up my car. Managed to get it to the repair shop without DH seeing, and just told him that I had taken it in because it was making a noise. If he had seen the damage he would be more convinced than ever that he's a better driver than I am (Come to think of it, he probably is). Talk about learning deceit!
Back in the 70s they put pay toilets at the airport, and many other places including parks. That didn't last long - people just crawled under the stalls.
charlotte, they started having a quarter deposit at our biglot stores in tx because the homeless folks were stealing the carts to live out of.. sad. divvi
Around here many of the stores now have 'locks' on carts. When they get to the edge of the parking lot, the wheels lock and will not roll no matter how far they get away. I imagine there are ways to unlock the wheels, but it seems to work. We don't seem abandoned shopping carts around. Believe it or not, stores are fined for each cart found abandoned on the streets. They actually hire people to drive around looking for them paying a bounty for each one - is cheaper than the fines.
How many of you are making sure you are getting Vitamin D for yourself and spouse? Low vit D can cause a multitude of ailments including confusion, muscle aches and pains, depression, high blood pressure, relations to diabetes/blood sugar, cancer, etc.
Don't you have to pay for those carts at the airport? Or is that just in Europe? I never check baggage here anymore. If I can't take it in one small suitcase, then I leave it behind.
At Aldi's here (a self service store), the carts lock together. You insert a quarter to free your cart to use. When finished, you return your cart to the corral, lock it to the next one and get your quarter back. Saves them a bundle on cart retrieval and damage.
Yes, lots of supermarkets here have the "Aldi's" system described by Carosi. Here it is 50 Euro cents but you can also use a round metal token of the same size. (They are popular giveaway items; I keep a couple in my purse) The idea is that you always want it back, so you take the cart back. At the Aldi in Rotterdam there are always homeless folks who want to walk your cart back to the store from your car so they can keep the coin (we're not the only ones with problems). Also you have to take shopping bags with you to the store, they don't give you bags (you can always buy one and in most stores you can pick out a free box from a pile. Sorry, this is really OT!
OT: Weejun, I met him on board a passenger ship in 1962. I was a student at Heidelberg College in Tiffin, Ohio and on my way to Junior Year at Heidelberg and he had a summer job as a night steward on my deck. A shipboard romance that stuck.