Okay friends, I can maneuver my way around a Web Design software program, I can manage a full service website, I can paste and manage advertising code, but I have NO IDEA what I am supposed to do on Facebook. Because I did not want to offend any of you who have added me as a "friend", I clicked "accept", and now find myself listed with other friends. That's about it. No clue what else I'm supposed to do. All I can say is if you want to know what is going on with me, all you have to do is log onto my home page- www.thealzheimerspouse.com - My life is an open book.
Hey phranque, your picture matches your wit. In spite of all you are going through, you look like a happy guy. And so much younger than I thought!
I had to smile when I tried a self portrait....could not see what i was shooting...and no I am not a happy guy and no I am not younger than you thought.... amazing what photoshop will do huh????
I just joined a week ago. So far all "friends" are relation but 1. At this point have no camera and no scanner so can't do pictures. Looks like it'll be fun, but gotta learn first.
Someone said to ID self so other can find us spouses. How do I do that?
carol, under your profile there is a place to write alzheimer spouse. Look at mine. Lois Mohr. You can make a folder for alz. spouse group and there is a section for you to divide friends and relatives. I can't remember who all are on mine but I belive I have 8 or 9 spouse members. I am not good at explaining this so maybe someone else will come on.
I'm with Joan...I can't figure out those sites..and now I've been approached with another one. Just tooooo many places to click and I'm afraid I'll end up enlisted in the army or something worse.. if I go at it blindly. I have a new cell phone to replace one that was almost 4 years old. It was an old flip phone encased in rubber. I think it was designed for construction workers but it worked for ME! Now I cannot figure out even how to answer this darned phone. It's all one piece with pictures that you touch and things happen...but never can I answer the call in time. I need to get one of my young grandchildren to show me how to work the thing. Joan made this site very user friendly, and that's what I like!
Yes Nancy, one must be careful with those Facebook type sites. My friend took a trip all over Europe, and I got what I thought was an invitation to view her pictures online. It's a place called Tagged. They wouldn't let me view her pictures unless I joined. So I joined. No pictures. No matter what I clicked, I kept getting invitations to view "friends." So now, every day, in my inbox, I get "tagged" by 12 men wanting to "meet" me. 12 pictures every day. I don't know how to "unjoin" and my friend said she never put her trip pictures on Tagged.
Phranque - no wisecracking remarks about this not being such a bad thing! (LOL)
You may want to go under privacy settings and unclick 'show wall posting'. This will keep your post from showing up on everybody's you have for friends.
I can just imagine someone checking up on Joan - seizing her computer and fidning out that she is on this wierd website where men are lined up lusting for her body!!! Oh Lordy!
I guess I'm like Joan. I got an invitation to be a friend. I didn't want to offend so I clicked 'ok.' Next thing I knew I was getting all kines of invitations--some I knew and others I didn't. I finally just stopped responding and they have more or less quit. I did not put my picture out there but I think I personally am out in the big world. I'd like to undo it but don't know how. I dont think I like it.
Hey all! Mostly I've just lurked, but I've kept an eye on everyone. I'm kind of glad to see it's the same ol same ol. The more AD changes, the more it stays the same.
Anyway, thought I'd pop in to help Joan. I got caught in the Twitter crap, too...exactly as you did. Wanted to see a friend's pictures, didn't find out until later that she never sent it and now I'm stuck in this company. I've tried to delete my account...same story..."It will delete in a few days, weeks, whatever" and it doesn't.
But I found out some phone numbers today, so I'm going to give them hell Monday and DEMAND they remove me. They ought to be spanked, lying to me that way. Here's the numbers in case you want to try it. I'll report back in with how far I get.
Tagged.com harvests people's address books to send phishing spam to get more people to have their address books harvested for phishing spam. Here are their addresses: Tagged Inc 110 Pacific Ave Mall Box #117 San Francisco, CA 94111 info@tagged.com
Tagged.com P.O Box 2863 San Francisco, CA 94126 1-415-462-5531 support@tagged.com
Hang in there, y'all. I'm going to Costa Rica with my son, and Germany with my daughter. yhc
I'm on Facebook, and knock on wood, have had no problems, must be aware of keeping the "Your Name, and Friends" clicked on, that way no one but those you want can get to your site. I love it. It's a fun distraction from the DISEASE and keeps me in touch with those not on this site that I enjoy. I know my friends here are here whenever I need them, but a bit of distraction is good. I Welcome you all to "ask me to be your friend" :o)
York, thank you for checking in! I'm so glad you are traveling now! Have a great time and let us hear from you!
As to Facebook, I looked last night and found three or four of you had invited me as friends! I've accepted, but there are more of us than have come around as yet. However, due to my working (can't get on Facebook at work) I don't get to Facebook until the weekends usually, so if I don't comment very often, please don't be offended!
I agree with Joang. I have been on facebook for several months (thanks to my sister-in-law), but I have NO idea what to do with it. I have approved those of you who are coming on, but won't be able to do anything until someone tells me what to do.
Seems to me Facebook could be dangerous. My daughter emailed me some pictures from a friends site. I enjoyed seeing them but if she can do that, then anybody can take the pictures you've posted and do anything they want with them. I joined Facebook to see pictures of the grandkids but feel uneasy after accepting so many friends requests. Are my fears warranted?
Well, you have to put it in perspective. Let's say your daughter had been emailed those photos. She could have sent them to anyone, couldn't she have? So Facebook from that standpoint isn't any worse than email.
With ANY internet item, you have to remember that if you sent it into cyberspace, you have sent it to everyone. Emails included. If someone wants it bad enough, they'll get it. Never send anything by email you wouldn't want to see on the front page.
But Facebook is a bit more "dangerous" in that there are a lot more people exposed to your posts, unlike email. Email has to be sent on by someone, whereas Facebook is laid out for everyone to see it. So here are the ways to stop that...
In Facebook, you add friends. Some are close friends that you would want to see everything about you (info, photos, etc). Others are just friends, and while you like them, you don't really want them seeing your photos and such. So you are able to 'set' the friends into groups, called 'lists'. You say that your good friends can see your expanded info, but not the regular friends. When you add photo albums, make sure that you show that only the good friends can see them. If you have photos for everyone to see, you can set that.
LMK if you have questions. I can usually tell you what to do. If you are a good direction follower, here's an excellent article.
Again, I have not have any problems and neither have any of my friends. Please feel free to add me as a friend. The more the merrier. It is just a fun place to share silly games with friends and keep up on what is going on in their life. Their are neat little quizzes to take, compare to your friends and laugh. I do FarmTown with my daughter and some friends, it's a funny little competition to see who can build the best farm. Just light fun, something we all need more of, an escape from reality.
I don't think the fears are warranted, Dazed - unless someone has some compromising pictures taken of you years ago that they post and tag with your name, although FRIENDS can take pictures from yours and send them along to others. Thus you could save a pic of a grandkid and send it to me, say, but I couldn't get to the grandkid's site or see his pictures. I did just look at Ann's beautiful Goldens and found that I could copy that picture or save it. (Tagging with a name in this instance is NOT the same as the Tagging site.) The tagging in FB can be good - if you're on, and someone posts a picture of you and tags it, you can renew friendship.. my son was tagged in a picture from high school (in which he was an extremely green Gollum in The Hobbit) by a friend he'd lost touch with who lives in Australia. I friended that friend too, and yesterday he posted that he knew it was Clare for sure now, because there were cats!! There have always been cats!
There are a great many time-wasters on FB, and in general I don't fiddle with them although I do love Pathwords, which is like Bookworm if you know that game, and there is scrabble. It is a nice way to exchange trivial information with each other, though. And pictures of our pets, etc.
http://www.ehow.com/videos-on_108_use-facebook.html is a good series of videos.
When I first got on I certainly said "NOW what?!!" and to a degree that's still the case. It is, however, very easy to create a list of friends there and to send them all one message. Better than posting to your "wall" which really IS out there for all to see.
Thanks trisinger and Briegull. I don't know my way around Facebook yet and didn't know I could compile a list of just my closest friends and family and have things for their viewing only. I will check on this.
F.Y.I. I just quit Facebook. It is for normal people. People with a life/wife. Young couples with vacations, kids, jobs to share. Older couples with vacations, grandkids, hobbies/jobs to share. I don’t fit in it. It doesn’t fit on me. I could not find any of my high school or college friends…they are probably all dead, as I might as well be. It is too complicated to work with, also, even if I had any pix to show or story to tell, or friends who would give a rats rear of my unlife anyway.
TJ, and I had added you as a friend there....And we are all "normal" people, just have AD spouses, which means that our lives revolve around AD and this sight. The thing that Facebook offers is that we can share pictures and maintain a little privacy while doing so.
I wish I knew what to say to you to help you understand that you have a lot to live for, and right now your wife needs you, and AFTER, you can develop a new lifestyle and make new friends. Right now, you have friends and family RIGHT HERE! You have a history that you have lived, and a future yet to be. Grab Folly's rope and use those knots!!!
Thanks, Mary, but I don't have time to fiddle with it anyway, even if I wanted to take pics of my wife sleeping in a recliner, the weeds in my yard, or scan and show pics of something that took place 20 or 30 years ago. Who cares? I'll wait for my next life, whether it is here (if I live long enough) or on the other side.
TexasJoe - have you tried searching classmates.com for high school friends? More and more people are registering there every day. There is the option to go free membership or a paid one. I just have the free one.
I think it is the rights to see more someone may have posted and to email directly. For free you can post a message and hope they come back and see it so they will contact you. It has actually been a year or more since I have really been there. I am posted under the high school, grade school and jr high I went to when I lived in Maine with my sister in 66-67. So far no one in Maine has joined from my class yet, but I keep checking back hoping they will. I found a good friend from high school on there after she 'dropped from the face of the earth' day after graduation. She was pregnant and even in 1970 you didn't stay around to embarrass your parents.
I have also connected with 3 friends from high school that I hadn't seen or heard from since a couple years after graduating. It's been great! I recommend the site if you are looking for old classmates - don't mean that literally (old!)
Why - we are old: some older than others. I love being over 55 cause now, not only Art, but I can get senior discount. Found out I can even get a free soda at one of my favorite fast foods:Taco Bell. Anything to save a few dimes.
Isn't it funny how no matter how old we get, we still are US? Not our spouses, maybe, but ourselves. I still feel perfectly young, but after a winter of inactivity because of the damnknee and the damweather, trying to walk far wears my body down! (no, not out of breath, just sore muscles!)
When did I get to be 72?? Last time I knew, I was 62. I want my 10 years back! And it isn't over. Before I have a chance to LIVE again, I'll be 82, then 92, then pushing up daisies. It's not that I want to be 30 again.....just 50, and with a HEALTHY wife. This really sucks.
Joe - I love fields of daisies! Let me know where you will be pushing them up!
Actually, they have grass seed out with wild flowers mixed in it. My sister spread some in the lawn off the deck. The only seed the birds left are little white daisies (think they are called wild clover but look like daisies.) We talked of taking some and spreading over our grandmother/father and mother's burial plot. You mow over them and they quickly come back. they don't grow as tall as grass will.
I wish you KIDS would stop talking about being old. If you are old I must be ancient. And I don't feel old yet. I am looking forward to tomorrow. May be it will better than today because today was sad.
My sister was talking to someone at Farmer's Market today. She told my sister she doesn't look 70. This is the sister that twice has been mistaken for my mother in the last two months.She is 13 1/2 years older than me and almost gray. I have a just a very few gray hairs. 7 siblings started turning gray at 16, a younger sister at 30 and I got my first gray hair after 50. I took after our dad in that way.
Oh, Bama, what's up? Sorry you had a bad day -- here's hoping tomorrow and the rest of the week are good ones for you.
I'm always surprised by peoples ages. I'm not good at reading such things. Somebody will ask me how hold someone else is and I'll say something like, "well, somewhere between 30 & 50, I'd guess". I'm sure I must look my age (60) and maybe much more, but I usually feel 40-ish so I don't let the numbers bother me, or the wrinkles, or the grey hair...
In just the last year I have been mistaken for my 4th younger sister's mother. She's 52 now and I'm not quit 61. What a deflater! Yet when I was 16, and would go along to mind my brother at the store while Dad shopped for material to fnish the upstairs bedroom/dorm, I'd get a charge at the "looks" my Dad got from seeing the two of us with the 2 year old. Sometimes I'd make a comment loud enough to obviously be overheard, to set the "lookers" straight.<LOL> I guess it depends on which end of the age range we're on as to how we react.
Weejun...Today was our 53rd anniverary and of course, he didn't know it. He told me a few days ago that I was so nice to him that he thought he would ask me to marry him. Today he was really confused and had a hard time talking to the kids on the phone. Telling him it was Father's day and our anniversary didn't really get through to him. We all have days like that.
Oh, Bama, bless your heart. It's pretty crummy to celebrate a wedding anniversary in such a manner. How sweet that he liked you enough to want to marry you. Bet you've had days when he WOULDN'T have wanted to... Hang on, girlfriend, you know the rope is out there, full of knots, just waiting for ya to grab on. Sweet dreams tonight and hope Monday morning is full of good stuff.
TexasJoe - I'd like to see your picture(s) on Facebook, current or not so. And you're right this all just sucks a lot of the time.
I would love to see all of you on Facebook - I'm assuming your pictures are there?
I'm not on it and my hesitancy is that I don't want to make contact with lots of people from my past. Plus I hated high school with a passion and I'm still trying to keep my mother from giving out my name to the "reunion" people. I can barely keep up with my old friends and now in this small town people just drop by. Sheezzz I must sound awful. I'm not awful, but in this life there is so little within our control, I want some control over who is going to contact me. YOU ALL ARE ALL WELCOME and I'D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU. You have to sign up with your own name and e-mail, address and etc, correct?
Oh sheerzzzz....I'm rambling and babbling.....main point: Can one get onto Facebook and see other's sites without signing up?
Oh Bama, that is sad. The "confusion" is so hard to listen to. I also love though that he would ask you to marry him. Nice to have that evidence of what a good and clearly loving job you're doing in your caregiver role.
Texas Joe....I think you're a YOUNG man. WHAT are you talking about. I'm only 54, I've gone very grey under all that color, have gotten Botox and other roadwork done in the past to iron out the angry lines....in short, some of what people see is STAGED....out of vanity, denial of the clock ticking, whatever. Look at the pictures of my horses and farm on my facebook page....do you think they always look that good??? Usually nasty and fighting fllies, muddy. (they like it that way) Do you think we'd post picstures that show us with sleep eyes and no makeup in the morning, or take a portrait of how our faces look all red and puffy (nose running) after our nightly cries? Oh, LORD! Most (sane) people show only the best side, what they're proud of!! So, DO NOT shy away from posting your life for us to share there! Some people have pictures of their AD spouses there. I don't . That's not what I want anyone to see. His pictures make me sad. My webspots are my Happy Places and I choose not to have anything on them to make me UNhappy. So, come back to FaceBook. Also, its a good diversion when you have to stay nearby. I'm having a little fun there, actually. Don't be so down on yourself!! We WILL have a life after! And it'll be SO different. You just feel worn out from the day in, day out druggery of it all and wrung out emotionally. Hang on to my rope .
I have been enjoying the Facebook experience, Mary are you Mary H.? If so I'll send you an invite, I haven't seen Phranque on there but I would also love to have him on my friends list.
I haven't posted a picture of my DW on Facebook either and I won't, she would be absolutely mortified if she thought I did that. she was always so proud of her looks and took such great pride in her appearance. I have really enjoyed looking at your pictures and getting some insight into each others lives. I sure this will help draw our little bunch even closer. As long as I can control the access to pages, I am willing to take a little risk. Just be sure and remove your birth year from your profile, that will go along way toward protecting your info.
Anyone else who wants to be my friend can just ask, just tell me you are from spouse.
Joan, I'm with you on Facebook. I spent 40 years of my working life as a Secretary and Admin Asst. mainly in education and health areas, and I can't figure it out either. I joined but don't use it. My older sis refused to join!!! (She uses her computer to e-mail and pass on jokes!!!!!!)
The rest of my family including my kids, sister, nieces and nephews and their kids all use it all the time to keep up with one another. If anything interesting shows up, my daughter tells me.
It's the group AZSPOUSE. If you go down to the very bottom you see two silhouettes and that's Groups. There's a search box up at the top when you select it, so search for alzspouse. Then "request to join" and I'll approve it. It might be best to tell me your screen name here, though so we keep it among ourselves.
Bama, awww. I am sure your dear husband would want you to know that he LOVES you with all his heart these 53yrs!!! how sweet -happy anniversary, dear bama and her sweetie pie husband. divvi