I am trying to make a decision on moving from N. Al. to NW Fl. or close by in Al. to be near our children. I am 81 and DH is 86 and is in stage 5 or 6. Do I need to sell our home and buy another one or rent? I want to keep him at home as long as I can but if he did have to go to a NH our money would be gone in a hurry. If we do have to put him in a NH and should have to use Medicaid what would be the benefits owning vs renting. I feel like staying in Alabama would be the best thing to do and it would still be close to the children. Does anyone have any advise for me?
Please check with a lawyer or accountant who knows whether your equity in your home is protected if you put him in a nursing home. If you can hang on to your house and not have it be counted in assets that have to be used to pay for the nursing home, then you can look at your house as a savings account. If that is the case in your state, you do better to hang on to the house. I know nothing about the laws in AL, so please check with someone who does know.
Such a move might be very difficult for your DH and make it harder for you to care for him. However, if you are caring for him without too much difficulty and you want to make the move, I'd consider renting your home and using that money to rent someplace for yourself nearer to the children. I wouldn't move further away nor sell the house if you could hold on to it, especially in today's real estate market. As you say, the money would be eaten up quickly by a NH and when this is all over, you'll still need money to live out your life.
i agree bama you should speak to an elder atty if you think you will need to get DH medicaide anytime soon. and you would need to find out the medicaide laws in florida vs alabama laws. you have to apply for medicaide thru each states agency. if you move from alabama to florida the laws may differ some- you want to do what will leave you in the best fiancial situation in the long run. check it out with the professionals first and know howit works before you make any decisions. divvi
What scares me is that many houses are on the rental market now because they couldn't sell this year ... I thought about renting when my home sells, and my greatest fear is that we'd get in, get settled, and then the owner would sell the house and not renew our lease. MOVE AGAIN!!! With an AD spouse, change is never easy...and I'd be forced to move again. If we were to rent a condo in a rental project, or an apartment, that wouldn't be the case, of course, but I have so much "stuff", I'd almost have to rent a house. The thought of moving is mind boggling. I don't know what we will do when the time comes.
We have to decide whether to downsize our belongings and get rid of the dust catchers, or get another place big enough to keep everything! My house is in a great location, it is just too small for us. However, when my husband passes, and the other two move out, it will be just right! So, I'm bulging at the seams and staying put.
Nancy, the words "move again" bring chills down my spine!!!! Only if a moving company came in and packed everything and I didn't have to lift a finger!!!!
Moving also sends cold chills up my spine, but I recently had a bad scare with my own health. Woke up one morning and couldn't raise my head up and had to call 911. They took me to the ER with DH having to come along. After a lot of test they decided it was an inner ear problem and sent me home as dizzy as I was when I got there. Of course, the first words out of my DH's mouth was I am hungry. It was n't easy getting to the kitchen and making him dinner. Seven years ago we sold our home and moved to NW Fl. but he was never happy there. He wanted to come back home so we sold and bought a townhouse and moved. We had only been back two months when I realized something was wrong. The only family he has left in the area is and older sister and she is not able to help me with his care. My children want me near by so they can help. I have located a new Senior 55+ living community with very reasonable rates per month. I would still be responsible for his care and cooking and all the other chores but I would have help if I needed from the daughters. The housing market here has not been depressed and units in my neighborhood have been selling because mostly seniors live here.
I have been having problems making a decision. I don't like choosing a home or rental home without seeing the property. The girls will check things out for me but I like to see the places myself and right now I don't think I could drive 450 miles with DH. I also have severe lower back problems, an arthrictic neck, and a tear in a rotater cuff which effects long distance driving. Daughters have one car families with children so I would not like to have them drive me on house hunting trips. Lord knows it would take several trips if I were to buy another home. Problems staying here and problems moving. May be I should toss a coin. I do know if I survive DH I would be moving south and in case of Medicaid I probably couldn't sell my home and move. Could live in it as long as I live but not sell.
No elder care lawyers here. I talked to and old friend who has been in practice for years and is retiring soon. He said we didn't know anyone who specializes in elder care. He didn't have much advise for me.
Bama--As far as I know, a law called the Spousal Impoverishment Act was passed a while back regarding Medicaid. One of the main things it did was to ensure that the home was not included as an asset in determining Medicaid eligibility. Although Medicaid rules vary from state to state, I think that the Act applies to the whole country. So, if you think Medicaid will be a possibility in the future, renting wouldn't be a wise move--you would lose the benefit of owning a home to exclude assets from the calculation. There should be a State agency you can contact in Alabama and in Florida to get information on eligibility for their Medicaid programs.
bama try contacting legal aide in the next largest city where you live? and tell them you need help but no elder atty in your town- they can help you -or you can call an elder atty in another larger city closet to you and have a conference call by phone. you can find out his fees and maybe do a consultation over the phone maybe? or if you can go to florida you may could speak to one there while DH is with your girls? you do need advice or like marilyn says you could lose the house as an asset protected from medicaide if you buy/sell/rent without advice first. divvi.
I checked Fl. and Al. Medicaid pages. Both were about the same. Both said that the home would be mine but after my death they could come back and possess the house for amount owed NH. Now if there is a lein on the house I would be unable to sell it and move to Fl. That was my understanding from what I read. I think it said they may or may not put a lein on the house. We do have a living trust with all the documents I need already in place and the estate, (if you want to call what little we have an estate) will not go through probate. Oh, well, I started life in a 4 room rental house that housed all 6 of us and anything better will be okay. LOL, I have gotten use to having the bathroom in the house so I am living the good life. I probably cannot find the energy to make a move anyway.
Bama, can you afford to fly one of your daughters to you (or get her a bus ticket - one way) and have HER drive you and your husband to Florida so that they can show you houses/townhomes/condos for a week and then the other daugther could drive you home and take a bus back to her town (or fly)? That would take care of your not having to drive the 450 miles.
In your place, I would want to be near my daughters, because if my health were like yours, you might need them quickly, and they would be able to get to you. Also, after, you would be closer to them as well. I also agree with you that you want to see what you are buying. Does it have doorways that are large enough for a wheelchair, and is it wheelchair accessible and is there room in the bathroom for one...these are things to look for now (not just having one in the house!) (It was really bad when below freezing and you had to go to the outdoor privy when we visited my grandparents!)
The main thing to think about is YOU. Where YOU want to live now and later, and go ahead and do it and get settled while you can. Your daughters will help you and don't feel badly to have to upset their schedules to help you and get you moved, if that is what you decide to do. Let them. You took care of them when they were little and needed you. <grin>
Anyway, that's my advice for what it is worth - that and a dollar fifty will get you a cup of coffee. Remember when it was a nickel for all the coffee you could drink? <grin>
I have wondered if there is any advantage to selling our condo and renting an apartment. An apartment would be less work to maintain both inside and outside. The major things that keep me in the condo is the fact that it is one floor and is located very near to just about everything a person needs, many are within walking distance. As houses go these days, we don't have a lot of money in this place and I don't have any idea what it is worth on today's market. The real estate tax deduction is also nice. The assessment value is frozen because I'm over 65, so the taxes won't go up. I've got far more space than I need, so I think I'll keep it. Besides that, I don't want to go through another move! I think I just talked myself into staying where I am.
I checked Fl. and Al. Medicaid pages. Both were about the same. Both said that the home would be mine but after my death they could come back and possess the house for amount owed NH. Now if there is a lein on the house I would be unable to sell it and move to Fl. That was my understanding from what I read. I think it said they may or may not put a lein on the house. We do have a living trust with all the documents I need already in place and the estate, (if you want to call what little we have an estate) will not go through probate. Oh, well, I started life in a 4 room rental house that housed all 6 of us and anything better will be okay. LOL, I have gotten use to having the bathroom in the house so I am living the good life. I probably cannot find the energy to make a move anyway.
(the above post by Bama was brought ttt for Colleen,
my answer to Bama's post would have been, the house should be transferred into your name at or before placement, after placement they still allow you time to transfer the home, if you have DPOA with gifting then you would own the house at your husbands death, not your husband. There is no transfer penalty from spouse to spouse. If the home is in your name at his death then Medicaid would not come back and recapture unless you yourself became a NH home patient under Medicaid. When the home is sold before the death of the Medicaid patient you have a certain amount of time to put the money in a new home even if it is still in both names.
I've been exploring possibilities for placement for DH..and trying to consider how best to live (rent/purchase) when that time comes as well. BUT along with that is the suggestion that I investigate the 'Qualified Income Trust' or Miller Trust.. and that has been discussed here as a way of protecting and providing for spousal support. The part that I don't quite understand, and maybe JANE knows.. is this: If the Assisted Living Facility is private pay (ie: Silverado in Houston), of what advantage to me is the Trust?
I'm waffling around trying to figure out where to find a comfort level in considering what moves to make and how. One day I think I should go ahead and sell our home to our son AND buy something as an investment for later..the next, I think I should just rent a furnished apt. and move us closer to the facility and do day care until placement is actually necessary...then Silverado calls and insists that its TIME to place him NOW (??) and mumbles that there are financial ways to afford the cost (suggesting the Miller Trust)..so there we are..
Whatever we do, it wont be in response to a FACILITY's urgent plea to just pack a few things and drop him off.. I guess they mean well?? Will keep muddling until I can make decisions that feel right and I didn't want to call Silverado to ask this particular question.
I agree Judy that you do not place because some facility keeps calling begging for your money. In fact, I would tell them you are not ready and if they keep on harassing you will cross them off your list of possible places. Just my opinion.