I guess I've been having a bad day--feeling sorry for myself. I feel like I am just marking time. No plans or goals other than just making it through the day. Whole life is on hold. Just sitting here on my pity-pot. To top that off, DH's really good friend just called. He is a farmer and has always taken DH with him when he delivers a load of hay to a store in Spokane. I've always looked forward to that time, but this time I had to explain that DH is incontinent. (Friend said, "Oh, poopie.") To which I said, "Yes! Exactly!" I'm learning not to get DH dressed until he does his morning poopie, either in his depends or in the bathroom without wiping. Either way, he needs a shower afterwards. It is usually around 10:00 or so in the morning. (Thing that can't be rushed) and his friend would be leaving about 9:00. On the plus side the friend is coming to visit him before he takes his hay to Spokane tomorrow.
DH is losing most of his language skills pretty fast, but as a tradeoff he's not having near as much agitation or sundowning problems.
Yup, I know how you feel, marking time, actually wasting time is how I feel as time is precious and I don't feel I'm making the best of the time I have. I'm sorry you aren't going to get your break, I know how much I would like one. Hang in there.
My friends.....I am finding out exactly what kinds of heros you all are, as I'm finding myself in your same shoes, poopie, pp and all. Have dental and doctor appointments for DH tomorrow. Today, going to DMV to get a photo ID and then to Staples to fax documents to Schwab and his lawyer in Florida. I don't think that I underestimated how much care this would entail, just comes as a shock to my system. I'm suppossed to be in treatment three days a week for narcotics dependence (from the past) and attending NA meetings......dont' know how that will happen. I got into John's accounts last night. We are destitute. Most of his IRA savings are GONE. Guess I'll be seeing Social Services soon, too, along with all the other tasks I have to attend to....and buy some Depends! Later on, I'm going out to my garden (hope to get John to sit on the front porch) and then, I'm going to GO WORK ON MY PONIES!!!!! (if I die, I die)
I'm staying on top of things, you guys! It's sure a bitch to get John out to run errands like getting a new photo ID and signing documents in front of a notary. I HAVE found out that they've run through a lot of his funds by putting him in some pretty fancy nursing homes and a pretty fancy (by my standards) Assisted Living facility initially. Going to talk with attorney later this week. Tomorrow, dentist and PCP for my husband. That'll be a big enough day for him. Does all the complaining your LO does ever REALLY GET to any of you???? Whew. What a day! BAM!.....with a brick!!
gmaewok, while sitting on your pitty pot, call Elder Services and see what they can tell you about respite services. My 6 hrs of weekly respite are a life saver, literally.
Thank you, Susan. I actually do have "respite care" about 4 hours a week, if you could call it respite care.It is usaully, rush, rush, rush to get the grocery shopping done and any other shopping and get home within the 4 hours. It takes about 40 minutes each way to town and back so doesn't leave much "me" time. I come home more exhausted than when I left and DH is cranky when I get back. This week, though, I am going to have a real break. A lady I worked with for about 15 years is retiring and I've arranged to go to her retirment party. She is a really neat lady. She was in a motorcycle accident when she was 16 and has been a parapalygic (sp?) ever since. I got very good at pushing her around in her wheelchair. We lived together for 8 weeks when we were both sent to the same training for work. She developed pressure sores which I became expert at treating. I learned so much about living with a disability through her. I am so looking forward to getting out and visiting with my old co-workers for a while.