Following is from my local newspaper. I cannot help but believe she had no support system. We must all be reminded to care for ourselves first or we cannot care for our loved ones.
Friday, May 29, 2009
Police say a North Austin woman killed her bedridden husband Tuesday because she had grown exhausted from caring for him for years.
Katherine Yarbrough, 52, was charged with murder Thursday, accused of injecting her husband, 62-year-old Lloyd Yarbrough, with an overdose of prescription pills through his feeding tube, according to an arrest affidavit. She faces up to life in prison if convicted.
Although investigators initially believed that Lloyd Yarbrough's death was from natural causes and that Katherine Yarbrough tried to kill herself afterward out of grief, Katherine Yarbrough made comments to investigators that made them think a crime had been committed, the affidavit said.
Sgt. Joseph Chacon of the Austin Police Department said Katherine Yarbrough's goal was to kill her husband and herself with the pills.
About 2 p.m. Wednesday, police officers were called out to the 7700 block of Meadowview Lane in North Austin by a home health care company that had not heard from its clients in the home since Monday, the affidavit said.
Lloyd Yarbrough was unable to move or feed himself because of viral encephalitis, which involves swelling of the brain and nerve damage, the affidavit said. Chacon said Yarbrough had been in that condition for about two years.
"I believe that lent itself to the motive," Chacon said. "She's pretty worn out from having to take care of him like that."
Officers began to check around the home and saw Lloyd Yarbrough lying in bed with his wife next to him — she collapsed repeatedly after she attempted to get up, the affidavit said. Officers found Lloyd Yarbrough "obviously deceased" and Katherine Yarbrough in need of medical assistance, the affidavit said.
They also found several empty prescription bottles and pills on the floor, the affidavit said.
Lloyd Yarbrough was pronounced dead about 2:35 p.m., and his wife was hospitalized, the affidavit said.
During a search of the home, officers found a note left to the couple's son signed "Kim" — Katherine Yarbrough's nickname, the affidavit said. In it, she apologizes to her son and says that "this is best in the long run" and that she hopes he can forgive her, the affidavit said.
A glass was found in Lloyd Yarbrough's room with a white, powdery residue that appeared to have come from crushed pills, the affidavit said. In addition, a syringe similar to the one used to inject nutrients into Lloyd Yarbrough's feeding tube was found in the trash with the same residue, the document said.
Detectives then interviewed Katherine Yarbrough at the hospital, where she admitted causing her husband's death by injecting his feeding tube with an assortment of prescription pills mixed with water, the affidavit said.
When detectives asked her if her husband wanted to die, she said no.
Katherine Yarbrough remained in the Travis County Jail on Thursday with bail set at $20,000.
Oh, great, guys. Texas is good for the death penalty. Will she get it? No. She will get years of lawyer wrangling, money spent, great agony all around. I feel so sad for her. And Yarborough is a well-known name in Texas, Ralph Yarborough was a US senator. Don't know if they were related. $20,000 isn't an enormous bail, though.
FayeBay, I finally have decided that each season brings on their own new set of worries. We thought after our children were out on their own our worries would be over, then there is grandchildren, and greatgrandchildren and the list goes on and on. Health situations have their own set of ongoing problems and worries.
There was a similar event to this in San Angelo, Texas about 3 weeks ago. A man killed his wife and waited 4 days to call police. It is very sad. I also imagine there are a number of people that said "if I had known, I would have helped". Maybe they would ...and maybe they wouldn't
On May 27, the Yarbroughs' home health care aide called 911 to say he was worried about the pair because he had not seen them in several days. Officers went to the home on Meadowview Lane. When an officer peered through a back window, he saw Kim and Lloyd lying in bed, the affidavit said.
Kim "appeared to be weak and each time she would attempt to get up she would collapse back on the bed," the arrest warrant reads.
At first, police thought Lloyd died of natural causes and that his wife had attempted suicide in a moment of despair, said police Sgt. Joseph Chacon. But while in the hospital, the warrant says, Kim admitted killing Lloyd "because she was tired of taking care of him." An officer asked her if Lloyd wanted to die. She said no.
"I have seen parts of her blog, and it's tragic," Chacon said. "You just saw the downhill slide of what she was thinking."
Kim Yarbrough was released on $20,000 bail.
Similar cases across the country have resulted in criminal punishments ranging from probation to life in prison. But friends say Kim should not go to jail.
"I think she's done all the suffering she can do," King said. "They don't need to punish her."
I agree. Situations like this is why I voted for the 'assisted suicide law' in Oregon. I only voted for it because I got tired of hearing elderly people being arrested and sent to prison because they ended the suffering of their lifelong mate. Now they have a legal option if they so choose where they can plan their last days.
It is tragic and a sin to allow people to suffer in pain for so long and/or for caregivers to get so exhausted that they see no other way out.
As I was reading this post, I thought of my husband. He is so concerned about what this disease is doing to him, us and our family. He makes comments sometimes that I will not have to put up with it for long. This worries me. I know he does not want to die, but he thinks this is the only way to make things better for all of us. I understand it will get bad, but I am sure this is not the answer. Sure it is easier but not the answer. I feel so bad for him. I have taken the keys to his truck and I do most of the driving. It is just scary when people think that is the only way out.
I have always said if I were in an incurable and intolerable situation I would want to try to end it myself. I don't know if I could actually do it. I am sure I would NOT jump off a bridge, set fire to myself, drown, hang myself, shoot myself. Too big a coward. It would have to be pills. Oh, my, Lois stop even thinking about such things!!!!!!!
My husband went through a time he was very depressed about this. I was very worried. His doctor told me that somehow those with AD are protected by the disease itself. I fought by giving him things to look forward to, reminding him of the good things he was doing and had done. Another friend who has known my husband for over 60 years made the comment that if he really wanted to end his life he would.
He is past all of that now and existing in his chair. Having gone through the disease as far as we have and seeing some of the other residents on the floor he is on, I can understand the despair that causes a person to end their loved ones life. If he got cancer, pneumonia or something along that line, I can let him go but I don't think I could actively do something about it for him.
therrja I understand what you are saying. As you know my husband is at end stage-but something even worse is starting to happen. The circulation to his legs and feet is terrible-purple color. Next step could be pressure sores which will not heal (I'm a nurse).That will be a very painful process. I guess I'll cross that bridge when we come to it. You better believe I Will be asking for advice from fellow posters. Problem is I am one of the oldies and I don't remember this problem coming up.
doneit, my husbands feet and legs up to his knees are frequently purple blochy and swollen. When my Mom was in final stage the aide told me to watch her feet and near the end they would become mottled and I seen them. She said usually they won't last long after that but she has had a patient who went 2 weeks. Is your dh still home and do you have Hospice?
My bil who died from complications of a stroke (possible VaD) had purple calves/feet the last two years of his life. It was wierd cause as he spent more time in bed it improved so that the last few weeks, for the first time in over two years, his feet were normal color and warm. About 2 months later he died. We think it was keeping his feet up so the blood didn't pool in his feet contributed to them pinking up.
This regarding a contributor to a sailing blog that I (danielp) follow. I’m not advocating anything but thought folks here might find it informative:
In the early morning hours of Sunday May 24th 2009 Philip Cunningham Bolger of 66 Atlantic Street, Gloucester, Massachusetts took his own life, out of his own free will, shooting himself in the head with his Colt 45. I awoke later to his absence and found his body on our property out of public sight ….
He had observed the progression of declining mental faculties in earlier generations of his family. He expressed this concern as early as forty years ago while discussing science fiction with one nephew. Phil speculated about developing a machine to test for senility; the patient would be killed painlessly if the machine determined the onset of senility. The point was to relieve the individual of any terrifying concerns about a slow, pernicious, and painful demise.
By May '09 at 81 he was in excellent physical shape for his age. What Phil and I, his wife and full business partner Susanne Altenburger had come to notice over a number years were intermittent but mounting episodes of apparent cognitive decline ranging from near funny to seriously disturbing. In business it came to express itself in a less efficient design process and diminishing productivity. On the personal level his recognition of the condition went from not noticing, over denying it, to gradually recognizing that he would not be spared either. We openly and soberly discussed the repercussions, options, and likely outcomes of this unfolding reality. And he made amply clear his insistence on controlling his final fate if at all possible.
…. A broad range of attempts to modify Phil's and Susanne's work routine to accommodate his slowing productivity proved ultimately unsuccessful. In the end, as defined by Phil this Sunday morning, he came to conclude that the inevitability of progressively losing his intellectual faculties and psychological strength had been confirmed often enough. He would not wait until he could no longer clearly discern the curve of his mental decline and concurrent emotional weakening …
The full text plus responses from his friends can be found at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/bolger/message/60397
In regard to danielp's request for updates on this case: As I hear more I will let you know. I'm guessing the local media will continue to follow this with interest.
Published: 9:33 p.m. Friday, April 2, 2010 An Austin woman who police say admitted to giving her ailing husband a fatal drug cocktail before trying to kill herself last year would be sentenced to probation if a judge follows a plea bargain she reached with Travis County prosecutors Friday. Katherine "Kim" Yarbrough, 53, pleaded guilty to injury to a disabled individual, a first-degree felony punishable by up to life in prison. Under the deal, prosecutors dismissed a charge of murder and will recommend a sentence of 10 years' probation and 400 hours of community service at her April 23 sentencing, said Assistant District Attorney Amy Meredith . It will ultimately be up to state District Judge Bob Perkins to decide whether to accept the agreement. Police say that Yarbrough admitted to killing her husband, Lloyd, 62, by injecting his feeding tube with an assortment of crushed prescription pills. A home health care aid found him dead May 27, 2009, at their home on Meadowview Lane, which is near Lamar and Research boulevards in North Austin. After Lloyd Yarbrough's death, Kim Yarbrough's friends and her blog entries depicted a woman who was overwhelmed with depression from caring for her husband, who had encephalitis. He could not walk, talk, swallow or perform basic functions. She blogged about her frustrations with outside caregivers and a lack of a support system. "I wonder if I will ever change Lloyd's diaper without feeling the pain of what has been lost," she blogged four days before his death. Two days before his death, she wrote, "Why should I keep living through all this?" The murder charge came after Kim told police at the hospital that she killed her husband "because she was tired of taking care of him." A Travis County grand jury indicted her on the murder charge and the injury to a disabled individual last month. Meredith said that after the indictment, she extensively reviewed the case with District Attorney Rosemary Lehmberg and Lehmberg's first assistant John Neal, and based on Yarbrough's clean criminal history and the facts of the case, they "did not think that the penitentiary was the most appropriate punishment." One of the conditions of probation, Meredith said, is that Yarbrough continue seeing her private therapist. Yarbrough has been free on bail pending trial. Her lawyer could not be reached.
Published- Tampa Tribune.... Does this story sound familiar??? SEBRING - A written plea of not guilty was entered Monday for 68-year-old Ruth Musial, charged with murdering her husband in late February. Musial was not present for Monday's arraignment. She has remained in the Highlands County Jail under no bond since her Feb. 27 arrest.
A Highlands County grand jury indicted Musial on March 16 for first-degree murder for allegedly killing Gerald Musial, 62.
His body was found inside the couple's Tanglewood home, located at 1010 Carefree Parkway, on Feb. 26.
Letters reportedly found inside the home gave a detailed account and time frame of the murder, stating that Ruth Musial put a large dose of the drug Clonazepam - used to control seizures and treat panic disorders - into her husband's food without his knowledge.
The medication "incapacitated" the victim, and Ruth Musial taped his hands and feet together, according to court records. When Gerald Musial tried to defend himself, the suspect allegedly put a plastic bag over his head and killed him. One of the letters reportedly ended with, "good riddance Jerry."
The arrest report stated the incident was related to domestic violence. Autopsy results for Gerald Musial were pending toxicology reports. Authorities are still awaiting autopsy results, Assistant State Attorney Steve Houchin said Monday. Ruth Musial's next court date is April 22 for a pretrial conference.
I feel the stress that alzheimers can cause for caregivers... Please do not let this happen to you.... BROOKSVILLE - An elderly man fatally shot his wife at a rehabilitation clinic Saturday afternoon and walked out the front entrance and turned the gun on himself, deputies said.
Employees and patients at HealthSouth Rehabilitation Hospital of Spring Hill were told there was a shooting and the facility was put on lockdown, said Lt. Jim Powers, a spokesman with the Hernando County Sheriff's Office.
George Larsson, 85, entered the facility shortly before 12:45 p.m. and shot Dorothy Larsson, 85, in her room, deputies said.
When deputies arrived minutes later, they discovered George Larsson's blood-soaked body slumped against the outside wall a few feet near the front entrance.
"It was not a random shooting," said Powers. "It was isolated."
Bystanders at the scene said Larsson had been a regular visitor for at least a few weeks. His wife suffered from Alzheimer's, they said.
"I do know he had been in and out and he was known to visit her," Powers said.
He would not confirm her medical condition and said the motive was still not yet clear.
The couple's family members live out of state and were notified of the shootings Saturday afternoon, he said.
A few dozen vehicles pulled out of the parking lot more than an hour later. Employees were questioned before they were allowed to leave.
"We heard a pop and it sounded like a balloon," said one man as he was pulling out of the parking lot shortly before 2 p.m. He said he was in the cafeteria when the shootings took place.
No alarms went off inside the building. Employees told the patients and moved them to another wing, witnesses said.
Jonathan Lavigne and Sherrie Cannon were riding by the clinic at 12440 Cortez Blvd. when they saw the crime scene tape and deputy cruisers. They pulled into parking lot next door and talked to some of the HealthSouth employees.
Lavigne said his wife had applied for a job at HealthSouth earlier that week.
"We're all concerned something like this could happen here," Cannon said.
Several employees cried and consoled each other as deputies expanded the crime scene and prohibited people from leaving or exiting.
Visitors arriving at the building were turned away at the entrance by deputies. They were told they could not return for a few more hours.
Saturday's fatal shooting was the third such incident reported in in Hernando County during the past 13 days.
Sarah Blackburn, 40, was killed Jan. 10 by her husband, Dr. Robert Blackburn, at their Lake in the Woods home in Spring Hill. Dr. Blackburn killed himself minutes before deputies arrived, according to reports.
Two women – Kathryn Donovan, 61, and Deborah Buckley Tillotson, 59 – were fatally shot at a house off Wilhelm Road four days later. Two others were injured in the shooting, including a pregnant teen who later lost her unborn child, according to the sheriff's office.
The suspected gunman in the attack, 55-year-old John Kalisz, of Spring Hill, drove to Cross City later that afternoon and shot and killed Capt. Chad Reed of the Dixie County Sheriff's Office during a stand-off, authorities said.
Kalisz was shot multiple times and remains hospitalized at Shands Hospital in Gainesville.
More........ FORT LAUDERDALE - The scenes seared into the minds of those who know Bobby Yurkanin differed only in place: Whether in the pool, around the dinner table or at the bowling alley, he was the 50-something man whose life had long before been handed over to the sickness of his parents. Always his father was by his side.
Yurkanin moved across the country to care for his dying mother, only to do it all over as his father sank into the fog of Alzheimer's disease. When the octogenarian grew combative, his son would calm him. When he didn't want to eat, his namesake would cajole him to take some fruit.
The son assumed his caretaker role out of necessity, friends said, despite a strained family history and a less-than-perfect childhood. And those who observed him and his father together often describe the younger Yurkanin with similar adjectives of praise:
Dutiful. Patient. Dedicated.
Yet all of this disappears into a single scene: A beachside argument, the father's lifeless body lying in the sand, and the accusing fingers that then pointed the son's way. It disappears into the accounts of witnesses certain they saw the son drag his father into the ocean, let the waves steal his breath, then tell the 911 dispatcher called by an onlooker to turn the ambulance around.
Yurkanin arrived at his lowest point following a well-worn path of the relentless, thankless, solitary task of caring for someone no longer recognizable under a mask of dementia. Millions of others know it. But Yurkanin's downward spiral ended with a charge of murder.
SEBRING - A Burbank, Calif., man charged with killing his wife last October and leaving her body in a Lorida citrus grove pleaded no contest to a lesser charge on Wednesday.
James Higley Barnes, 65, was originally charged with first-degree murder. At Wednesday's pretrial conference, he entered into an agreement to a reduced charge of second-degree murder with a firearm resulting in death.
The minimum mandatory sentence is 25 years in Florida State Prison.
On Oct 13, 2008, Highlands County Sheriff's deputies discovered the body of Virginia Navarro Barnes, 62, in a citrus grove near Buckhorn Road in Lorida. The victim had multiple gunshot wounds.
More than a week later, investigators began looking at Barnes as a suspect after receiving a tip from a family member.
Barnes called the sheriff's office at 2 a.m., on Oct. 2 and reportedly admitted to killing his wife and wanted to turn himself in. He said he drove her to the scene and killed her, because he did not want her to live in her "current state of dementia," according to the arrest report. Family members said she was suffering from Alzheimer's.
I am so worried that some of us (we??) caregivers may possibly be driven beyond the point of rationality, and contemplate these same tragedies. If you feel that you are nearing that point, please please post your thoughts, and this group will help you. If you feel too embarassed to post, then email me anytime....I will always be there to help you.... I will give you the encouragement, help, and tools needed to fight this disease... I may be just a bumbling idiot, but I care about you and understand where you are at..... Whatever you do, avoid this type of tragedy by reaching out to us... I just hate reading about this in the papers.....
The same outcome may have been acomplished without ever being recognized and may be more common than we think.
Close friend at work. Her uncle had 'memory problems' but had no formal diagnosis. He could still drive but could not be 'trusted' for full self care. He lives in California and he wanted to attend a family event in Texas. Because he could not be trusted to navigate the distance alone, they arranged for other family members to drive with him and then return back to CA after he had arrived.
About the border of Oklahoma and Texas he gets furious and kicks the people out of his car continuing on alone. The capable family members call back to California and alternate travel arrangements are made for them. HOWEVER. . . . . .
The California family DOES NOT report him missing for at least a week(?) They said the wanted to see if he would make it to the destination by himself. . . . Almost a month after he goes missing they (finally) travel to OK/TX and mount their own search.
The car is eventually found intact on the side of the road with all luggage and no signs of violence. Looks like it ran out of gas. It has been 4 years now and no trace of the missing person has ever turned up.
I have talked to my friend to try to learn more about their delay in searching but she says that "they did everything the could as soon as they could" It kinda reminds me of when Eskimos put their elders on an ice flow and push it out to sea . . . .
One of the things that this disease has taught me is to have more empathy for those that are caught in the caregiving "trap" and overwhelmed by it feeling that they have nowhere to go for help and when they try they get swatted down for various reasons.
As I watch my husband as he is now, I can understand why there are people that would take the steps to end their lives. This is not what he wanted for himself and if he could talk he would say "take me out and shoot me". He is actually living one of his biggest fears for himself.
The real question is what can we do to help the situation of others not understanding. Talk to others and educate them, so that these tragedies don't have to happen. You never know when a causual conversation you have with a person will reach the ears of someone who deparately needs it.
Not a soapbox, just good advice to all of us. Keep the advice coming and we will all share what we need.
phranque, you are such a compassionate person. The very times that I can't seem to go on you and others post something that picks up my weary spirits and gives them another boost to keep going.
God has blessed all of us with unending love and concern for each other in this horrible disease's grip. As more and more people are becoming caregivers of many different diseases they are also becoming more compassionate to others. Maybe thru all these horrible diseases this is the way to bring the world to a better place of love and understanding. That is the silver lining to this disease that I see today. God Bless all of you with a great evening.
My husband is well aware of how AZ advances.His Dad and stepdad both had it and he has said a couple times"I feel like blowing my head off".I know the disease is scary for him and I can understand how he feels.I have gotten rid of all the guns except my personal handgun which is locked away.I try to reassure him that I'll always be here for him,what more can I do?
yhouniey - you will be reassuring him a lot. He probably won't remember that you have done that and told him that you have no intention of leaving him. In your husband's case, he may feel more scared because he really does know what is coming for him. If he has a sense of humor still, you could always look at him and say "could you do that another day? I don't have the energy to do the clean-up". Then give him a huge smile and an even bigger hug saying that you love him. The next step is distracting him with something that he will really want to do. Sometimes, I would even dance with him around the house and that always eased him.
This is something I wrote about in 2003. I don't know whatever happened to the woman.
ELDER ABUSE
True story from the Los Angeles Times: A 69-year-old woman pleaded guilty to elder abuse of her 69 year-old Alzheimer’s husband with Parkinson’s for the second time. Two years earlier he fell out of bed and spent the day on the floor in his own waste until she called 9-1-1. She was ordered then to provide a safe environment for him. When she later asked a neighbor for help taking him to the hospital, he was dehydrated, malnourished and had bedsores so deep they exposed his bones. The neighbor testified that he found the man caked in his own feces and covered with open wounds.
The wife was accused of having the knowledge and taking the action to willingly neglect her husband, that she controlled and dominated him and did not suffer from mental illness. Letters critical of the wife, written by the husband’s relatives who did not appear in Court, were serious enough for the Judge to charge her with neglect of her husband.
Social workers failed to keep tabs on the husband and did not help the wife with his care. The relatives had time enough to write letters of criticism, but were not available when she had to call on a neighbor for help--in fact, there is no mention at all of their helping her in any way. The wife said her husband was cantankerous and mean. He wouldn’t eat anything except milk and dessert and refused to go to the hospital, wouldn’t use a bedpan, and wouldn’t let her diaper him. Obviously, it was not accurate to say that she controlled and dominated him, otherwise he would have done the things she wanted him to do. She put medication on the bedsores and thought they’d heal.
Did the neighbor who testified against her come in afterwards and help her turn her husband every couple hours so that he wouldn’t get more of the bedsores he’d already seen? She certainly couldn’t do it herself. Who stayed with him when she had to go out? Who helped her bathe and shave him? What two relatives were there to lift him from the floor when he fell out of bed--because no normal 69-year-old woman could possibly lift a dead-weight man alone? What social worker sent someone around to show her how to get him to eat? Who helped her with the bedpan--even if he tried to be cooperative, it would still take two people? Who was assisting her when he resisted her trying to clean and diaper him? What kind of nursing training did she have? How much money did the relatives or society offer so that she could hire help? How many years had she been doing her best before she gave up? If she didn’t become mentally ill, it’s a miracle, but you can bet she was physically and emotionally exhausted. It’s a wonder she wasn’t also accused of beating him.
Maybe she really was an evil woman who schemed to abuse her husband. But it’s just as likely, after being literally locked away in a house day after day, year after year, with a man she once dearly loved, but who was now a madman, that she’d become a tired old woman, expected by family, neighbors, the law, government and society to care for him all alone without any help as if he were normal--in fact, the Court ordered her to do so--without any physical or financial assistance, and finally she just couldn’t do it anymore.
So here’s the question: Who was really the victim of elder abuse--the husband or the wife?