I don't understand why my DH is always falling asleep (more so this year) even after sleeping most of the night and getting a 2 hr nap after lunch. Is this another stage? The stages seem to come on so quickly.
brindle, same here. Unless he is eating or we are in the car - out and about- he is sleeping, dozing. I get so frustrated and ask him to please try and stay awake for an hour. But, I would rather he be doing that than Sundowning, Verbal or physical abuse, wandering etc.
Maybe we should be happy with what we have. At least it is quiet here.
My wife is sleeping in her chair next to my desk. That's what she does unless something is going on, such as a TV program, drive in the car, etc. At day care they keep her active, but I don't seem to be able to do that.
See also the thread "He won't wake up, eat, or drink". I'll bring it to the top.
me too, i have to admit i feel guilty, he is sleeping more during the day. on the plus side,i have some hrs i dont have to be vigilant 24/7..the negative side, i know thought its a step further into the abyss and it saddens me.. as they progress more and more- sleeping is expected-divvi
Thanks for the comments. I guess I feel guilty that I am not keeping him very busy but I don't really know what to do. We can't really go out to eat because he takes so long and the bathroom is an issue. He doesn't do well in crowds. I can't really drive far as I am so sleepy all the time myself (lack of sleep. Up at 2 am this morning and could not get back to sleep).
brindle getting sleepy while driving is dangerous. I know there were times in the past I would get so sleeping driving in the sunshine I have even pulled into a Church Parking Lot and took a nap. Never did find out the cause but it is scary. My dh sleeps good at night. I give him a xanax at bedtime with his Aricept, Namenda, Neurotin, and Flexeril and Tramadol pain pill. You might try giving his pills at a different time to see if that will help him sleep. He wakes around 4 for bathroom then goes back to sleep. Plus he still dozes and sleeps all day.
I take a .25 xanax and tylenol pM at bedtime and that usualld does pretty good.
I forgot about the eating out. I usually go to Mc for breakfast and he can do good with gravy and biscuits or a biscuit sandwich. Sometimes we go to a steak house for lunch and get the sirloin tips and baked potato bar. I fix his potato for him. They both have good bathrooms and he handles the food good but slow. It is best to aim for 2 hours or less and maybe avoid bathroom stop. No salads or spaghetti, noodles.
Ohmygosh NO. YOU are so right lmohr. NO noodles, and NO spaghetti sauce. Hubby looks like he was shot in the chest when he last ate Spaghetti...red sauce from his collar to his belt. More and more, he prefers to eat with his fingers. I saw him eating a baked potato with his fingers tonight and just had to look away. I put a different utensil in each dish, such as a teaspoon in his Dannon Yogurt, a fork in his pancakes (with one piece on the tine of the fork) He will use the spoon in the yogurt, but the pancakes end up in his fingers.
My DH sleeps 2-3 hours several times a day. He also sleeps a good 8 hours at night. Another thing I've noticed--I had him take the garbage can out to the curb this morning. (Today is pickup day). He complained for over 1/2 hour how exhausted it made him. The other day I had him cut up some cardboard for the recycle bin. Same thing. He complained how exhausted he was
I guess this means he is declining faster. We had company for dinner tonight and he was telling a story. He had it so balled up. I didn't bother to correct him--didn't make any difference. I'm getting pretty good at picking my battles.
My husband did the daytime sleeping thing. He is high functioning and he was put on Depakote after his first episode of becoming physical with me. I fully expected that he would be on the couch a Zombie and I was "comfortable" with that as he was becoming very frightening to me. Not so, he has become his same sweet mand that I married over 40 years ago, has more energy, is working in the yard doing heavy work. I am not suggesting that Depakote is what others should take. But, go figure. I also was very grateful that he spent the time sleeping altho I also felt guilty. He also has major clinical depression and previous heart attacks and takes a ton of meds that would affect a very large elephant. He reads a lot now instead of sleeping. Many times the same book, can't remember what he read, but enjoys the process in the moment.
dagma, I think we are lucky to have a med to keep them calm and easier to care for. Like I mentioned in another post, I recommend anyone trying a new med to just get a 3 day supply until you can observe and see how they react. I speak from experience because I have a few bottles of unused meds in the back of my cabinet that were very expensive.
Nancy, regarding spaghetti sauce, that's why I have DW wear a "bib" when eating. It sure saves on laundry of her clothes. The "bib" I am using is a child's apron I found on Joang's Zazzle site.
I've tried bibs, bad word. Renamed them APRONS, .. he'd grab at it wadding it up and growling, "I hate this dammed thing". It was soft and only covered his shirt. I spray his golf shirt fronts with Scotchguard, and it helps prevent most stains.
I'm the one that needs the bib. And I'm constantly making something with tomato sauce or soy sauce when I'm wearing a light colored shirt! TERRIBLE! My husband, otoh, is still a pretty fastidious eater.
lmohr, I have some of my pills I no longer use because they changed my meds when I was in hospital in January. I asked at the pharmacy the other day how I could dispose of them and was told to take them in and they would dispose of them. You might check with your pharmacy if you want to get rid of them.
Jean, good idea but I think I will hold on to them a little longer in case the Dr. opts to try one of them again. I have them packaged up and marked. I will keep an eye on the date.
Getting only a couple of the meds at one time is a great idea! Wish the Drs would recommend or even think about that. Glad to know about the spagetti as I had not thought about it. I use small towels for lap area and found this is pretty good. I will also look into a child's apron. With so many of us having problems like this, you'd think there would be more things available. Oh well maybe some entrepeneur (sp) out there will make a killing. DH is using his fingers more and more no matter how many utensils I give him. He gets them confused. I saw him eating his pork N beans with his fingers. Oh well, at least most of it gets into his mouth. I tell him he is wash and wear and not to worry. HD eats in his recliner with a TV tray so he can watch his favorite shows at the same time. Getting him to the table and sitting down was a real struggle. If we have company, I use the transport chair as it is easier for him to get into (arms) and move him close to the table. So glad I found this group of wonderful people. Thanks for sharing.
When I was nursing a baby (decades ago) I use to eat with a serving spoon-it required less aim to get the food out of the dish and less aim to find my mouth! At the moment the larger spoon helps DH a little. PatB
Spaghetti can be made using macaroni instead of regular spaghetti. When I first got married my sister-in-law made it this way - called it American spaghetti. Weird. But it is less messy to eat.
I've used penne noodles with spaghetti sauce and my family really likes it. The kids like to spear the noodles with the fork tine. Talk about cheap entertainment. :)
We just make spaghetti the regular way, put the servings on the plate and with a knife and fork, cut it up into bite sized pieces. We have some Italian friends whose family has been doing that for generations! <grin>
Try different kinds of macaroni pasta. There are a couple of kinds that are spirals (with different names), and Penni and shells in different sizes. All are easier to eat than spaghetti. We have always alternated spaghetti with the other kinds of pasta, and I know that pretty soon I'm going to have to give spaghetti up, but at this point he still handles it well.
I have to admit that the first time I saw someone who's family had been in the US forever eating spaghetti, I almost freaked since my own family only got here in the last generation. She cut the spaghetti up into small pieces and forked it up. I used to collect very old magazines and saw that method explained for eating the oh-so-foreign spaghetti in a 1926 issue of Good Housekeeping. They were also suggesting that if you were really ready for an adventure that there were OTHER SHAPES. <grin> And no one had ever heard of mac and cheese back then.
The other thing that really got to me was an ad for Ivory Soap. They were suggesting the totally OUTRAGEOUS idea that you might wash your hair once every TWO WEEKS with Ivory Soap. There were no shampoos in those days, not even the ever present Breck from the 1940s.
Boy are we ever off topic. I was amazed when the ALF where my husband resides served regular length spaghetti to be eaten with spoons by the residents. You better believe I complained. Actually I asked for a demonstration by the staff on how to eat this neatly. They changed their food order that day.
Starling, I made mac and cheese for dinner last night...the best I've ever made (or I was starving from my gardening!) I make a cheese sauce from scratch and add salt, pepper and red cayenne pepper to it for flavor. Even though I made enough for two meals for everyone, there was only one leftover portion! <grin> And my husband ate his without dropping a single piece of macaroni!
doneit, smart move on your part!
Starling, I remember using Breck....that Breck girl's hair was so pretty and not a strand out of place either! Then we used Prell for a while, then White Rain... I'm heading down memory lane again.... off topic as usual! Sorry!
mary, share that mac/chees sauce from scratch???/ sounds delish! flowers here in tx are gorgeous this week with all the rain lately. the bluebonnets were not as abundant this yr with the drought. my hibiscus are blooming like mad..all colors in pots around the pool. i water and dont look too hard i do not have a green thumb. my sis in law planted these for me and its green thumb helping them along so beautifully. flowers are such joy..divvi
My hubby sleeps alot, too. In fact, he's sitting behind me on the floor sound a sleep, as I type. I still work 40 hours a week (Tuesday-Saturday) so I didn't really know how much he sleeps during the day, until recently. I have someone come in twice a week for 2 hours at a time, so he's alone quite a bit. As long as he sleeps at night, I'm okay with it. Thanks for bringing up the spaghetti issue. All of a sudden, DH couldn't twirl his spaghetti anymore, and was making a total mess. I didn't put it together with he AD at first, duh! Being Italian, I can't give up my pasta, so I just use shorter noodles now, like bow ties or penne. ~Di
My husband is sleeping alot also ,this is his schedule wakes between 630 - 7am takes medication eats breakfast watch tv sleeps wakes up feeds birds and rabbits in the backyard eats lunch watch tv sleeps eats dinner starts going thru the house turning all lights off at 630pm ( He feels that once we eat dinner it is time for bed) watch tv sleeps all nite This is it everyday occasionally he will take out the trash for me if I ask. What can we do to get them to do something other than this same routine? He has no energy to do anything Stage 5 shows some signs of 6 at times
Is that they have no energy or no desire? My hb sleeps 10-12 hours a night. I will say he does not sleep during the day anymore. I now a lot of the reason is boredom. When you have spent your life getting up and going to work and that is no longer an option, then what is there to do? As he says - you can only 'tinker' around for so long. I would think the further along they get and the less they know they can do, what else is there but sleep?
By the way, divvi, I am your neighbor to the north - north central Texas. Also, LO sleeps a lot, and won't wear a bib or napkin at dinner, but will at B'fast and lunch...weird.
FTD I have no advice for you other than to be thankful he is calm and serene. My dh is virtually the same except he gets up at 8-9. Sponge bath, teeth and shave and shower at bedtime. He sometimes lets the cat in/out and feed her. I don't work so I take him to Mc every morning for breakfast/brunch and stop at a few places while he waits in the car and 3 times a week stop at exercise place and he rides the bike and a couple other easy things he can do with my help. That is the only time he stays awake and the only thing he does. Bed at 9:30.
FTD, that's my husband except that he doesn't feed beasties. Or do anything around the house at all. I do take him out about every other day for errands. He's always willing to go if i promise sushi for lunch. He'd like to eat sushi day and night, with chopsticks and neatly. It's EXPENSIVE!!
Yes, our market has it too. We ate that for years. But they got a different chef who is very slow and doesn't make good tight rolls. Which got me started on using the takeout "express" of a very good restaurant a few miles away. It's really not much more than the supermarket, and much tastier because they have all kinds of inventive rolls, so I indulge. We don't eat out more than maybe once every six months, even for breakfast.
Sleeping all the time is not the worse thing in the world. My DH fell and fractured his pelvis. He just can't find a comfortable place to sleep. I ordered a recliner which should arrive tomorrow, but he can't get into our bed. I put him in the guest room where there is a day bed, and he can hold the back and pull himself in, he slept in a chair a few nights. but didn't really sleep. So no sleeping, he's cranky, irritable, uncomfortable, in pain, and I just wish he'd go to sleep. I'm giving him tylonol with codeine, but he gets constipated, and I'm giving him colace, but now he seems to be breaking out in hives. Please just go to sleep!!! Be careful what you wish for. You might get it.
My DH sleeps almost all the time. Twice a day - he lies down in a bed and sleeps soundly for an hour or so, but when he is in his chair, he sits with his eyes closed - although he says he is "not sleeping". His doctor said it was part of the disease. Just like with a baby ... who sleeps most of the day..and night.,
Lois, I too am thankful he doesn't wander or criticize me. I did squirt him with Fabreeze when he had a yelling fit recently. The yelling was more of a cry of frustration, than of anger. OF COURSE, that didn't make his yelling , "Awwwwgggggggggggggggggggggggg" any easier to hear...so - I shot him. With Fabreeze. Shame shame shame.
My husband had a very confused day yesterday and today looks like it is going to be a lot of sleeping day. Normally he doesn't nap in the daytime, but during a confused period, he does a lot of sleeping. This is obviously what the next stage is going to be like. Turns out I'm not going to be able to time it to the full moon, because that is long over.
My husband dozes off and on during the day while watching movies, sitting in his recliner. He dozes during the night as well. He'll even sit up in bed and fall back asleep while sitting up! He is getting worse, and I no longer am concerned about his sleeping too long or not sleeping enough. It's part of the disease and there is nothing I can do but upset him if I try to keep him awake, so I let him do as he will. The amount of sleep seems to change from most of the time to cat naps to rarely sleeps. It can last for weeks or months, and then change. My motto for over a year has been "go with the flow" - it save wear and tear on both of us!
My husband will fall asleep while sitting at the table with a spoon in his hand. He is actually holding the spoon in an outstretched hand and nothing I can do will wake him.
doneit, do you think that is a TIA? My Mom would do that and sometimes her face would fall down on her plate. She did this during her last months and only occasionally. We thought it was TIA. We would ease her down to the floor and soon she would awaken and not know anything had happened.
Lois, I don't think so. My husband has fallen asleep while eating many times. With forks or spoons halfway to his mouth. When he wakes up, he continues as if he hasn't been asleep for 1 or 2 or 5 minutes! And his morning coffee cup!! EVERY morning we have to ask him to set his coffee cup down because he will spill it when he dozes off between drinks from his cup!
Wonder what you would call it? My Mom was in danger of falling to the floor if we didn't move her. Laying her down soon woke her up and we attributed it to lack of oxygen or blood in the brain and when we laid her down that would equalize better. Would that be vascular D?
My husband can fall asleep with his cup in his hand. His water is in an insulated cup with a handle, and he'll doze off and the cup will tilt forward and spill in his lap or on the floor. It is the disease, I don't think it's TIA's. I wish we could find adult size sippy cups...with handles... I've looked at many child size, but the holes are too small in the spout.
Lynn sleeps all the time too. His kids comment on this, bugs the heck of me. Course they don't go visit him or try to do anything with him... just comment on what more I can do for him...grrrrrr. Had they bothered to see him when he was still at home they would know he has been this way for a couple of years. He is 77. He is tired. His brain is dying. Cut the man some slack and let him rest. I go to the nursing home every day. I make sure he gets some exercise every day. Other than that, if he wants to sleep I let him. Poor bugger... sigh