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    • CommentAuthorStuntGirl
    • CommentTimeApr 9th 2009
     
    Okay, it's after five o'clock and in my new book, that's called "attitude adjustment hour".... vodka and orange juice.....or tomato. Just one....but a double. I've come to the end of my rope here. I spent my day babysitting my telephone waiting for calls from the nursing home and doctors. Turns out, to make a long story short, that I DON'T have power of attorney anymore and so, can't take my husband home with me when the time comes when he is released from treatment. Simple as that. I CAN be brought up on charges of kidnapping if I do come and just take him home with me. My sister in law says that that is stupid and I'm stupid, but the word of the nursing home administrator is with me. With my family's animosity toward me, l could be be setting up for this kind of thing,,,,not just being paranoid. Help. I'm so tired. My husband has given up....is refusing to eat....is down to 110 lbs.....wants me to find someone else....at times tells me he loves me so much....at times tells me I'm at home behaving like a whore. Tried to talk to my youngest daughter today. She doesn't want her father and I to be together. Doesn't understand our need for each other in these last days, doesn't want to cooperate and help us at all. I've sent my lawyer step-son a letter describing all these things and asking for his help, hope that will accomplish something........last five minutes......I got a call from John's sister saying she's going to call the hospital adminisstrator tomorrrow and let her have her permission to let me go take John home with me (does thaat mean she has POA? At least good new she's communicsating and willing to help me. Stsill says she doesne't know who has POA. Weird. I'm busy making travell plans....planes, cars, hotel rooms and a way home. And help that I can afford at h ome. Pray for me if there is a God for you. (Why won't anyone telll me who has POA?)
    • CommentAuthorJudy
    • CommentTimeApr 9th 2009
     
    For goodness sakes, I don't know how these things work, but is it not possible
    to contact the records office of the place and try to get someone to tell you
    WHO is named as DPOA?? Eeghaddsss. If its not you.. its evidently someone?
    Surely it isn't the STATE? Good luck and honestly StuntGirl.. I'm not sure if the outcome of having him back and taking over all that care again would help.
    Glory bee. I just don't know.. I'm tired today..even though I think I understand.. if the other family members are taking over the involvement with his care.. it could be a blessing for you.. but I suppose thre are lots of other factors.. I'm jsut sorry
    Yes, you go ahead and make it a double!!
    •  
      CommentAuthorSusan L*
    • CommentTimeApr 9th 2009
     
    The nursing home MUST know who has POA. We did ours through the atty who put our wills together. Prayers are with you.
    • CommentAuthorkathi37*
    • CommentTimeMay 24th 2009
     
    I just need a basic attitude adjustment for my life. G has had a meds change, and I don't know if that is the cause of his rapid decline or just normal progression, but I'm having an extremely difficult time dealing with him. I find myself not wanting to come in the house after being outside, and looking for side trips while on the way home from grocery shopping.He is refusing to eat and switches from Mr. Nasty to compliant in an instant. Our once happy home feels more like a combat zone to be avoided at all costs. I'm certainly to blame for much of the atmosphere, but being Pollyanna doesn't work for me. Guess this is just pity party time, but I'm so P.O'd much of the time I feel like a stranger to myself.
    Is anyone else stressed all the time? At the OHSU stress mgt. study I participated in, I did find a couple of kindred souls...others "felt blessed" to have the oportunity to be a caregiver...hello? Am I that out of touch?
    • CommentAuthorAdmin
    • CommentTimeMay 24th 2009 edited
     
    Kathi37,

    Hope you don't mind, but I am moving your comment and giving it a topic of its own - "Stressed all of the time". You bring up a lot of good issues that need their own topic that is not tied to this older one of Stuntgirl's". Anyone who wishes to comment on Kathi's situation - please do so under the new topic I created.

    Thank you.

    joang