......... today was the first day for my husband to attend Adult Day Care. I finally was able to get him a spot after a 4 month waiting period. Initially the prospect of him being able to interact with others and for me to have some time to myself actually made me giddy with excitement.

Although I am in desperate need of a little respite time it was bitter sweet this morning as I put him on the Handy Dart Bus for his ride to the Day Care. He looked so tentative looking out the window and waving to me. This is the first time in 6 years we've actually been apart for ANY part of the day ...... it just seems kind of empty in the house. The feeling is the same as the day I sent my Son off to kindergarten all those many years ago ........ guess we're forever care givers ........ in one form or another.

For me ......... today I'm going to go out to lunch with some of the ladies in our complex ..... they lunch out the last Tuesday of each month so I thought today was a good day for me to join in and try it on for size.

Barbra its bittersweet i know but he will interact with his own kind and love to enjoy it. be patient, like the first days at school he and YOU:) will adjust! each time you put him on the bus, think that he also may need time away from you as well. i did the same thing so many yrs 24/7 tied at the umbilical cord with DH. i wished i had sent him to daycare to interact now looking back. go have your free time and enjoy enjoy!! and we will be waitng to hear all about your good time out witht he ladies. divvi

I know how you feel, Barbra. The first day I took my DH to Day Care, when I picked him up he said "I thought I'd never see you again" I felt terrible. He's been going three days a week for seven months now and he really likes it. They have a lot of volunteers who are all so nice. They're right at the door to call them by name and are all smiles. Lot of activities they can do or just watch if they don't want to do anything. I think he loves all the attention. They get a hot meal every day. I'll ask him what he had to eat. He'll say that he doesn't know but it was good. LOL They give us two calendars every month. One tells the daily activities and the other tells what the lunch is each day. Very nice idea.

how did it go, Bar-bra?

Hi friends ! ......... just cleaned up from dinner and got husband showered and all tucked in for the night ..... we both had a GREAT day !! ....... R really seemed to have enjoyed himself although he was/is very confused about what he did at Day Care - he said there were all sorts of people there some thin ones and some brick ones ..... LoL ! - not too sure what a *brick* person looks like ....... sooooo, your guess would be as good as mine. One of the program directors called me after R left the center today to tell me he'd had a good day, what activities they had done and reported he'd enjoyed himself. She told me what he'd had for lunch and how he had managed - they had to cut his food for him although he said he could do it himself apparently but, they could see him struggling ...... he's such a proud man.

For myself, i had a great day as well. Took a leisurely shower after R left on the bus this morning and had lots of time to 'put my face on' and get dressed and then I enjoyed lunch out with 12 other ladies at a nice restaurant. Good interesting adult conversation and no gossip (which is surprising 'cuz we all live in the same gated community and there's usually all sorts of gossip going around - snicker).

It felt real strange driving by myself today as well, as R and Rosie (our Yorkie) are always with me ....... i almost felt like I'd escaped from somewhere ........ LoL !!!!!!

I feel so happy tonight - amazing what a few hours of change and diversion can do for you.

When I was tucking R in tonight he was still talking about his day and I said I was so happy he'd had such a good time and had met some new people and he replied 'ya', so I said 'just think, you get to do it all over again next week' ... that seemed to puzzle him so I explained he'll be going on the bus to Day Care and lunch out every Tuesday - he seemed quite happy about that.

THANKS for all your good wishes !

Bar-Bra, Glad to hear of the good experience with the daycare. This summer it will be 3 yrs for my DH--he attends Mon. thru Fri. It has been great, but not perfect. From time to time, some aggression surfaces there between him and the other clients (I see nothing like this at home). However, the staff is good and knows how diffuse the problems, and if they persist, the director calls me. I received such a call yesterday, that a few incidents have happened lately, so I contacted his doctor and he upped the Seroquel dosage. I hope he can continue for many years--the alternative, bringing help into our home, would not be as good for either of us. I know at the daycare they keep his mind stimulated the entire day, which I'm doubtful an aide could do. I credit that brain stimulation for keeping the disease progressing slowly--if he was home all day, he'd just watch TV or sleep. I hope your husband's enjoyment there continues--that's the way it's supposed to work!