As you all know, my husband passed away on Feb.17th of this year. I wrote at that time a message relating to my surprise that my grief was so intense after being on the journey of Al zheimers for nine years with him. I am still having frequent moments of missing him so much and I think I have discovered why . I now am beginning to remember my sweetheart, my soul mate, of years ago including his looks, his mannerisms, his delightful wit, our enjoyable events that we attended etc. and the memories of the stranger he had become are rapiding fading away . I miss the person whom I loved all these years and the other person whom I had been the caregivfer for is becoming a nebulous dream. I am thankful that the good memories are erasing the difficult ones but I am now having to allow myself to grieve anew hoping now for the closure that I could not obtain all those y ears of grieving for the one I had lost. I am thankful that God gave me my good memories anew and I hope my fellow spouses will experience a renewal of their remembrances of their beloved mates whom they married.

I relate this sequel t o the grieving process (at least with me) in the hope that you will have an oppportunity to have a renewal of your spouse's pre alzheimer 's person and be able to cleanse the heartbreak of t he lost years from your soul also. It is a bittersweet gift from God but a welcome one.

Joyful, it is so good to know the happy memories are returning. As bluedaze said, you give us hope. Thank you for taking the time to let us know. Our thoughts are with you as you grieve.

Joyful, I am so glad that you are remembering the good memories already. As Bluedaze and Folly said, it gives us hope. Please check in and let us know how you are doing. ((HUGS))

Thank you, Joyful, for giving us this encouragement for the "after times."

Beenthere posted of a very similar experience after her DH passed away. That post is on the Memorial thread.

Such a wonderful sharing of something reassuring for those of us still in the trenches with these diseases.

Thank you for thinking of us, joyful. And come back whenever you can. You're family.

Joy, you put into words exactly what I've been feeling. Claude passed away February 26, and I am now starting to remember some of the the good times rather than the bad.

I still have bad days, for example reaching up into the cupboard for a coffee cup and seeing "his" cup sitting there (my daughter removed it immediately) and bursting into tears which lasted most of the day. I can laugh now about our first date where he stumbled on a chair leg and poured a full pitcher of beer on some guy - he hadn't even had a beer yet. It was a bit tense at the time, but it's funny to think back on it now. The good memories are slowly coming back and the memories of the last six years are slowly fading.

Like Joy said, there is hope for all of you when you finish walking down this long, hard path and you will be able to remember the good things.

God bless all of you.

Mary

Thanks you guys for such comforting words. I too am crying. You are such sweet and gentle souls and I am so glad you are here to share these very personal thoughts when coming out of the depths of grief. Thank you thank you thank you and God bless you.