Just as there are stinkers in our lives I don't like to get stuck in that negative morass. My kids are here when I need them. One daughter told me she was coming because SHE needed to be with me when Bill went missing. Other daughter is flying in tonight to walk with me on Saturday (Memory Walk). While they don't offer-whenever I have needed specific help neighbors have been here for me. Don't understand why I am in such a gracious mood today-but I like it. I had friends over for dinner last night and perhaps the tulips they brought are brightening my day as they sit on my counter top.
bluedaze, I am also well blessed with family and friends. They do have their own lives, though so I try not to impose. We are fortunate to be able to pay someone to do things around the house that DH is no longer able to do. I feel better doing that than calling on my children who are so busy raising their own family and working. I don't have to deal with step children so, thank God, we don't have the family issues that some of you have to deal with.
My neighbor brought me a bouquet of flowers from their yard yesterday. It does help brighten your day, doesn't it? They also offer to keep an eye out for DH when I have to run errands or go the grocery store.
Because we came here aftrer initial diagnosis, we don't have friends in this area. DH was a workaholic and our traveling since retirement added to that.
You are blessed. Many are not. That's why those of us who don't have children as dear as yours, cling to this site and get a little bit of comfort from our cyberfamily members patting US on the back. I think this site is invaluable to those of us not as fortunate as you are... and is OUR BLESSING.
Oh Nancy, no matter how good family and friends are, they don't understand what we're dealing with like our dear friends on this web site do. I cling to this site just like you do and check the message board several times a day. All of you are my support group and such a VERY good one.
This site has been my salvation. I can share thoughts here that I would never mention to my family. No one but us can understand our loss. I don't depend on my kids for anything. I hire help for what I haven't yet learned to do or can't do. I'm glad I don't have to cope with children from a previous relationship. I do feel blessed to know I have a strong family who will be here if I ask.
I agree with dazed and bluedaze: No matter how good friends and family are, no one but "us" on this website can understand our loss. It has been a lifesaver for me and I'm not near as far down this lonely road as many of you here are. My son (DH's step-son) would be here in a nano-second, if possible - but is awaiting a pancreas and kidney transplant - and he's in FL and I'm in KY, so not possible. But he is sooooo good about calling, e-mailing, etc., and just being there for me to lean on if I need him - even with all he's going through.
I like your attitude, bluedaze. (Gotta get me some of those tulips.)
We are blessed with wonderful doctors. It took a while to find them, but WELL worth the effort! They are knowledgeable and compassionate, treat my husband with respect, and listen to my concerns.
I've been very lucky. A daughter who "gets it" and a son-in-law who when pushed to the wall by the fact that his father has dementia too, got it. A family doctor who is amazing (and mine is amazing too while we are at it). A neighborhood group that has arranged for respite for me, and who actually got my next door neighbor placed (she lived alone) when she couldn't do it herself and needed to do it. Just amazing people.
I've got the problems of no real friends here because he was already sick when we got here, but there are blessings in my life too, and it helps to be aware of it.
And I'm gotta get me some of those tulips too. Maybe tomorrow.