I know they say one of the downfalls of AD is that the AD LO's short term memory fly's out the door, Why is it then that they forget how to dress, tie their shoes, etc? They learned to do this stuff when they were 3 or 4. It's something they have done all their lifes. What got me started on this was the other night we were going to meet friends for dinner, in the same strip mall there are several restaurants and one of them has closed their doors. We were like wow! And off goes my Dh explaining that the company has had issues since its CEO and some other mucky muck from the corporation died in a plane crash, yadee yadee ya. Tells us what year the plane crash was and all that. Yet that morning he had a heck of a time finding his own feet to put his socks on. I just don't get it. Today we went fishing (his first Love) it was like he has never even seen a fishing pole, and the best part, I am fixing it! Oh so not my thing! I would much rather spend the day shopping and at the spa then on some cold, wet river bank. Why would he be able to remember something he read a few years ago, yet not be able to do something he has done most of his life? I just don't get it! Rk
bluedaze, Oh no we can't use worms, (I could handle them, deal with them in my garden everday) he's wants a wooly bugger or some other fuzzy hook lure's thingy bob.
Ok, I get that there probably is no answer, but why do the "they" (meaning Doctors, medical professionals, etc) say short term, when it seems more like long term is affected just as much.
Rk---Just an idea. Regardless of the type of dementia, the damage hits different parts of the brain. When it hits an area that controls motor skills--they lose balance, or have leg weakness, or can't write anymore. The varying areas being affected would explain why one loses all speech and another at the same stage can no longer walk without a walker. I don't think anyone here has seen their LO purely regress--Short term, then backing down the years; physically sound and then in regressive decline. My DH is clear on some current events he sees on the news, but is back in the early 90's when he calls our dog, by an old dogs name. Does it frequently. He mistook one sister's daughter for another niece, who looked like her--20+ years ago. Also, I think sometimes the things they retain have some kind of special significance for them or are a part of something that was important or a large part of their life. Little things like tying shoes, were minor activities--not significant, so they're not retained.
Special lures go with special kinds of fishing that take special equipment and skills.
Dr.'s are probably calling it "short term" because that's what appears to be going soonest/quickest. Remember, Dr.s aren't seeing the decline 24/7/365. They are seeing only what they can look for during an appointment or test.
THESE ARE JUST MY CONJECTURES, BUT THEY'RE WHAT MAKES SENSE TO ME. And yes, the losses being all over the board can make you crazy, because your mind is trying to deal with this on a connected basis. When you can start accepting--"Oh, that's broken too" and just take it in stride, it does get easier. There's not much else you can do, because it is what it is.
I agree, it does all depend on what part of the brain is being attacked at that time. In Jim's case with FTD the two front and temperal lobes go first. This means he will and is losing speech, language and personality, etc first. He will retain his memory longer. Eventually, but much quicker, he will "catch-up" to end stage AD symptoms. I hope this makes sense, I just woke up. :0)
Thursday my DH asked me how many states there were. I told him 50 and he asked if Alaska was part of them! Yesterday he was going to get the mail so I asked him to get something I had left in the car trunk. I showed him which button to push on the key fob to open the trunk. He comes up with the mail and asking how to open the car trunk. Then he can sit there and tell me things from when he was in the Air Force or whatever. He retired from the AF in 1973. Other times I have to remember he has AD because he seems fine and I wonder if I am losing it.
It is soooo hard, they change from moment to moment, for a split second, every now and then, Jim will be the man I met and fell so deeply in love with, and then poof he is a confused child. I never know what he will remember, but the sadness he feels is tough. He knows he is confused, he knows his memory is going, he knows he is using the wrong words, FTD is really cruel in that way. As I've said before, the only good thing, and only this group would understand this......is that he will not have to suffer for all the many years most AD patients do. Talk about a mixed up blessing.
We've mentioned before that this on/off switch is probably the absolute cruelest part of the whole business.
When then forget how to dress themselves, we take it in stride, shake our heads, and do it for them. But every once in awhile, they have clarity. You'll come in, and they'll be dressed, or have done whatever it is that they haven't done in awhile. And no matter how much you know it isn't true, some little part of you says, "YES! She learned it! Or remembered it! She's getting better!"
It is understandable...you do things for them the same way you did it for the kids...over and over again until one day they did it for themselves, and then you knew they were done needing you for that. It's so hard to remember that AD works backwards...being able to do it one day is the exception, not the rule. But you just can't help the tiny little moment of wondering if they're getting better.
And then you're back to reality..."Yes, dear, we really did have this same kitchen yesterday."
It's funny how we even try to fool ourselves--when my husband remembers something surprising, does something I'd thought he'd lost, there's that voice in my head--maybe there is hope--maybe he won't get any worse--I could live like this forever--maybe it's not AD but something not as bad. Then I say to myself--it is AD--aside from the decline--he has so many of the little behavior "quirks" that have been discussed on this board.
i felt overjoyed last nite i asked DH to pass me the silver tv clicker on the table next to him -he handed it to me which was such fluke and a joy! haha. yes priorities do change with AD!!. i cant figure if he really doesnt know what i am asking or just doesnt want to do it! on our anniversary i told him it was our anniversary and i wanted a hug and a kiss..he says, 'i'll give a hug but maybe not a kiss'...say what??? like he needed to be the one with the last 'say'..haha.. a few minutes later i said i was sad he didnt give my anniversary kiss and came right over and did it smiling and said happy anniversary. floored me. so yes i am in the group of you that has no clue how the dang disease progresses and how/when it affects their thinking patterns. divvi
Yesterday, my husband tried to change the channel on the TV with the phone. They do look alike. That is the first time he did that. The day before I took him to have some pants shortened. When he had finished changing, he said to me, do you have my wallet. No, I didn't. Luckily, the young woman tailor checked the pants he had given her, and there it was. He doesn't need a wallet because I drive everywhere and pay for everything. The amazing thing is he continues to score a 22 on the mini-mental test for over a year and last month even remembered the the three words he had to memorize. He can't tell if the dishes in the dishwasher are clean or dirty and has been know to put the dirty ones in the cupboard. He still knows our children, but if I tell him they are coming over, he says why. I have gotten better, I think. I just accept it. But, sometimes, it is just hard.
Ok, I guess I didn't really make myself clear last night. I was a little tired.........................
It was really not about Dh forgetting how to find his own feet, my question was more about why is AD always associated with short term memory? When clearly its about so much more? It's not that I get frustrated with the disease so much ( Baffled! Yes!) fooled no! denial no! I am in complete understanding that it's a fatal disease, and what kind of toll it takes on our loved ones, it's more that I get frustrated with the information about the disease. Does that make sense? Its more about the information provided about the disease thats just as frustrating as any day spent as a caregiver. Why when you see most info written about the disease is one of the first side effects the short term memory issue? Yet so much seems to be long term memory issues? Example someone who has spent their whole life being an accountant, now can't add 2 +2, or a Lawyer can't find his way thru a court proceeding? Or a electrician can't even figure out how to use a volt meter anymore?
Yet they can come off with some blurb about the current state of our economy. Which is current memory versus the past memory stuff?
Why, don't the medical professionals just say it effects the brain and leave it at that! It just seems that they have to try and label it as this or that, yet they truly don't know, I completely get that they are looking for answers but some of the answers given just don't add up. I actually think the information at hand about the disease, almost set's us up as caregivers. Just as there have been other post here on the subject of the public not getting it, the information provided to us ( and not just the short term memory thing) isn't always correct. If they just said we don't know, then we as caregivers wouldn't be expecting one thing and getting another.
And we expect the public to understand? We can't blame them, they have been given the same info we have. And we all know that in reality it's not just short term memory stuff. It's so much more! No wonders we get comments like Oh he or she doesn't seem bad, Cause goodness knows they can talk to you about the current state of the economy. I can't count how many people have told me, oh I have short term memory issues too! Well don't we all. I guess what I am trying to say, I just don't get why it has to be about short term when we all know it's so much more than that!
I think they focus on the short-term memory loss because it often is one of the first to show, and it also is the first symptom that others notice. They're trying to educate the public for early diagnosis ... and probably also trying to avoid scaring the bejeebers out of 'em, or they won't go NEAR a doctor for diagnosis!
Well said everyone! Let's face it, we could and should write The Book! On a funny note, I have tried to change the channel with the remote, looked all over for my glasses, which were on my head, search high and low for my cell phone while talking on it and so much more, Caregiver Dementia, strikes again, lol!
There is a temporary condition called 'stress dementia'. I know we've experienced it if we've ever received a phone call that a parent died, a loved one was in a wreck and has been rushed to the hospital, - for a moment, our brain is numb and we don't know what to do first.
There is a speaker on the circuit who claims he has had Alzheimer's Disease for over ten years, has written books and still is writing them, does TV intereviews, etc., Qualified people (M.D.'s) say he definitely does NOT have Alzheimer's Disease. Others are infuriated that he is making money and giving false hope with this growing and more publicized brain disease. It is suggested that he probably had a temporary stress dementia or dementia following a stroke...and was misdiagnosed...and he's run with it.
Although they will not say it publically, some people with our Alzeimer's Association are infuriated with him for capitalizing on something so serious... and making others hope they can live with the disease for a decade and not slow down.