Brigull - thanks for sharing these articles. The first one was so true, I have seen and heard too many stories of advanced directives being ignored. It is up to the chosen advocate to try and ensure that they are followed.
I have said comfort care only for my husband as he is now in stage 7. My problem with that is what if my idea of comfort care is what is keeping him here? This is a very difficult subject to discuss with many people as they are very uncomfortable with the idea of letting someone go.
Therrja, we've talked a lot about it here. NO PACEMAKER RENEWALS!!! as I'm sure you've picked up on. But beyond that... well, the only thing I have to go on is how I've tended to cats and dogs, and of course that doesn't work for humans.
For Joyful, Earnie was NOT comfortable being fed. And she made the courageous decision not to push him. And if your husband's in a facility, THEIR ideas of what make him comfortable may not be yours or vice versa! It's a puzzlement.
Briegull, I love your expression, "It's a puzzlement!" Straight from The King and I.... and so appropriate.
And I did look up the Brie Gull. What a wonderful picture. Who knew gulls could stand up on their tip-toes. Went on to read everything about Monhegan Island. How enchanting! Imagine running away from home and meeting at the little Inn on the island. Dream on!
Nancy, I'm working on a website for their group that's considering wind power right now. In the spring all the sun-birds (as opposed to snow birds) start thinking about the island, and what needs doing, and so on. The tradition is that you don't reserve a house or a room until January 1 for the next season, and on January 1 everyone feels like the top of the hill's been reached and now we can slide down the other side until the time we get to Monhegan. This year it's stressful for me though, since my husband really can't go - hasn't gone in years, and I really have to find a place for him to stay so I can be out there for a few weeks.
briegull, sad to say, I am also using how I have tended dogs and cats as part of my guidelines. I am lucky enough to have a friend in nursing who has done a lot of terminal and geriatric care so she has been very helpful. One of her comments was you never know if an action that you do will make them last longer or not - I agree - tis a puzzle. He's now stage 7 fast heading towards end stage and I know that this is not how he would want to live but it sure is different when you have to make these types of decisions for someone else. At this point, I pray that he goes fast and without pain.
The puzzlement continues. My husband is at stage 6-7. He is dependent in all ADLs. On a good day he can feed himself and shuffle walk. This week he is deeply asleep while sitting at the lunch table with a spoon in his hand. No amount of shaking him or calling his name will rouse him. When I feed him he does swollow. I am sure he is not in pain. Not sure which breath will be his last. It's like he's in limbo between two worlds.
No I don't. I have questioned this issue and when his meds are reduced the rage comes back. I think if he went into anothe rage it would kill him. That is not the way I want to see him go.
of course not, we will keep our hopes that he will have some good days ahead of him yet. remember not long ago you were saying it could be the end, blue color and all. he made a comeback. i know its so very hard. hugs and a pat on the back, divvi