My wife has lately been talking about death and where she wants to be buried. She has also stated that she wants me to remarry and she does not think she will last very long. I do not know if that is a wish or if she is planning to do something. I do not like to leave her alone, at times she acts depressed, but who wouldn't be. I do not know if her topics are a warning or just her processing the future. She is in the early stage to mid stage AD. She is that Aricept and Namenda and sleeping pills at night. She is not on any Anti Depressants I was just wondering is it normal for them to talk about the future and plan things.
My husband told me one day that he was going to die soon. He seemed very concerned about that fact. I finally looked at him and asked him if he wanted me to be there when he died - he totally relaxed and said yes.
If she is depressed, there are medications that can help with that.
She could also be looking for reassurance that her end of life will be taken care of.
My Non-AD uncle was very worried at age 88 about his death - my mother took him to the cemetary so he could see where he would be burried and to the funeral home so he could pick out his casket. He was much more comfortable after that.
She may also be trying to make sure that you will be okay when she goes.
Does she have a regular schedule? Is she busy enough? Does she see people enough? Even now with my husband deep into stage 7, he lights up when someone comes over to him and shakes his hand. He always liked people so this means a lot to him.
Oh, my. How difficult it must be for you to listen to her. Is she on an antidepressant? You might talk to her doctor, see if he thinks a prescription for one might help her feel better, poor lady.
Claude's aide came this morning to shower and shave him. He has started to go downhill fast and we realize the end is near. Malinda has been an aide for 36 years, 18 with hospice, and she said she doesn't think he will last a month.
Even tho I know it, it really shook me up. He is pretty much bedridden now and just lays there and is in pain from another health problem. As much as I hate to admit it, it would be a blessing for him to go so he will be out of pain.
Years ago, we discussed what arrangements we wanted after our death, and have told our kids so they are aware of our wishes.
My dh mentions he doesn't think he will live long, but I don't think he thinks he is going to die tomorrow, more like in a year. I tell him I am the one with BP, cholestral and heart problems and I will most likely die before he does and that seems to satisfy him. I don't tell him that after I die he will have to go to a NH.
I don't think he cares a iota where he is buried, etc. I am the one into that. I chose our burial plots, planned our funerals and have written a rough draft of our obituary's. I felt better after I got that done. Had to do it myself though as nobody here wanted to go with me. I had all that together for my Mom before she died, including her burial clothes and it really made things so much easier.
I took one of my daughters with me when we made final arrangements. That way there will be no doubts about my wishes. I even put in my will that there are to be no plastic flowers on our graves (I grow beautiful orchids and other "real" flowers. When we picked out the casket we had trouble keeping a straight face in the show room. We both have a warped sense of humor. Scattered around the room were wooden fish. Had to ask why. They are corners. WHAT??? They fit on the corners of the casket and are then given to the family as mementos. I think not! I assume there were many choices for the corners-but that's just not me. Couldn't see the point of deluxe pillows and blankets either. At that point we couldn't stop laughing. Felt sorry for the poor saleswoman trying to maintain a semblance of decorum. I think they were glad to see us leave. After this long horrible journey I just want it over-but on my terms. I am very glad that all is in place. I have no fear of death. To me it is a part of the life cycle.