I was wondering if any of you who are still working, have had any issues with the work place and your role as a caregiver?
I've looked up some information at www.worklifelaw.org and it does talk about "Family Responsibilities Discrimination" (FRD), but I wanted to know if anyone had actual experience with having to resolve working and your role as a caregiver with your employer.
Family Responsibilities Discrimination (FRD) is employment discrimination against workers based on their family caregiving responsibilities. Pregnant women, mothers and fathers of young children, and employees with aging parents or sick spouses or partners may encounter FRD. They may be rejected for hire, passed over for promotion, demoted, harassed, or terminated – despite good performance – simply because their employers make personnel decisions based on stereotypical notions of how they will or should act given their family responsibilities.
FRD affects men and women across the income spectrum and employers in every industry. Cases have included those in low-wage jobs (grocery clerks, nurses’ aides), pink-collar jobs (administrative assistants, teachers), blue-collar jobs (police, firefighters), and professional/managerial jobs (lawyers, doctors, executives). Here are some examples of FRD:
* firing or demoting employees when they become pregnant; * passing over highly qualified mothers for hire or promotion in favor of less qualified fathers or women without children; * firing employees without valid business reasons when they return from maternity or paternity leave; * denying flexibility to employees who want it for child care reasons, while allowing flexibility to employees for non-family reasons (e.g., to participate on a sports team); * firing employees whose spouses or elderly parents become disabled for fear of increased absenteeism or higher health insurance premiums; and * fabricating work infractions or performance deficiencies to justify dismissal of employees with family responsibilities.
Wasn't the Family Leave Act supposed to protect people against the kind of discrimination you are talking about? The year before I left work, there were THREE of us in the same department (Speech and Language) who had to use the Family Leave Act. One woman went out of State to stay with her mother who was a widow and had back surgery. She took the full 12 weeks. Another woman had both parents die within a short time of each other, and needed the time to settle the family affairs - she took about 4 weeks. And I took a week to travel to Chicago to take care of my sister after her surgery. Our employer was MANDATED by that legislation to give us the time off (unpaid) for up to 12 weeks with no recrimination.
Yes the FLA does help, but to me, that is more helpful for short term health issues. AD is anything but short term, and I just wonder how you balance work and being a caregiver without going broke.
I know that for myself, my employer has been very good in allowing me to work from home a few days a week. I'm in the IT field and my job can be done from anywhere, but I wonder how others manage who do not have the option to work from home, or have employers who can give them a flexible schedule so they can manage work and caring for someone at home.
It is my personal opinion that AD is viewed so differently then other illnesses, that it leaves caregivers out in the proverbial cold when it comes to meaningful support. That doesn't feel right to me and I'd like to know how others have dealt with continuing to work while caring for someone at home. It seems that the caregivers are the ones with the overwhelming disability. And there is little or no help at all for us. At least that's how I feel right about now.
I'd like to get some in home care at some point in the near future, but my wife is not liking the idea at all. I know others have tried to say that they are getting someone to come in and help out with the housework, but I think my wife is seeing through my little plan.
I know that when I do go to work, I am in a constant state of stress, and if I don't figure out something soon, my health is going to go straight to hell. I'd like to prevent that.
My employer wooed me back from another company even after we went public with my husband's AD. The newspaper article we appeared in months earlier was in the break room my first day back. I was told by HR that if I needed to reduce my hours later to care for my husband they would work with me.
They have also given me time off so my husband could participate in the phase III Elan BAP study. I know this is off topic but I wanted to say that hubby's MMSE score was up to 29 vs. 26 from when he enrolled last spring.
Great news on all fronts. Great to have been wooed back to your company and that's one good MMSE score!!!
I wonder though if you and I are lucky to have such understanding companies. I think all caregivers should be afforded all the help they need. To me, that's REAL family values.
GuitarGuy - I would recommend staying home with her the first couple of times so she will get used to the lady. Then try and wean yourself away from her. It is not easy. My DH is still not happy with me leaving him with our cleaning lady and he has known her for years. I have her stop at Mc and bring breakfast and his beloved vanilla iced coffee for him and her (which I reimburse her for) and that really helps in his case. She has had illness the past 2 weeks and not been here so I may have new concerns when she comes back.
Every year on Mother's Day I encourage sons and daughters to do something nice for their moms, like making them breakfast in bed or helping out with the household chores.
But this year, I say we give moms, and all caregivers, something more lasting: peace of mind, job security and the financial stability to care for loved ones all year round.
Caregivers need all the support we can give them. Governments across the country are finally beginning to address caregivers' struggle. In February, New Jersey joined California and Washington as the third state to pass legislation that provides paid family leave to caregivers. But New York State, so often on the forefront of innovative and progressive legislation, has yet to pass our bill, the Working Families Time to Care Act.
The number of working caregivers is overwhelming, and growing. In 2004, the National Alliance for Caregiving estimated that there are 44.4 million informal caregivers in America, and nearly 59 percent worked while providing care. In New York State alone there are 1.9 million people providing informal care to loved ones. Half of caregivers report they have had to make work-related adjustments in order to help take care of their loved ones.
With everything caregivers have to worry about, they also face the stress of potentially losing their job if they have to care for their sick parents or an ill child.
It happens because the New York City Human Rights Law protects against many classes of workplace discrimination—including discrimination on the basis of race, color, creed, age, national origin, citizenship status, gender, sexual orientation, disability, marital status, partnership status and status as a victim of domestic violence—but noticeably absent is the category of caregiver.
Workplace discrimination against caregivers actually takes many forms. Working moms get assigned to “mommy track” jobs with lower pay; working dads get subjected to unfounded performance evaluations after they reveal they are caregivers.
That is why I introduced a bill in 2007, with Council Members Bill de Blasio (D-Brooklyn), Gale Brewer (D-Manhattan) and David Weprin (D-Queens), to give caregivers protection from workplace discrimination. The Caregiver Bill (Intro No. 565-A) would close a loophole in the NYC Human Rights Law and expressly protect working caregivers from employment discrimination.
In this context, the term “caregiver” applies to a person who provides ongoing care for a child for whom they have assumed parental responsibility, or a person who provides ongoing care to a family member or partner suffering disability or impairment.
The Caregiver bill prohibits employment discrimination based on an individual's actual or perceived status as a caregiver, adding caregivers to the list of protected classes and requiring that employers make reasonable accommodations to enable caregivers to perform and fulfill the requirements of their jobs.
One caregiver who called my office, Toni-Anne, was struggling to balance her job and her responsibility as a caregiver and mother to her 13-year-old autistic son. Toni-Anne fought to hang on to her job as her son's disease became more and more demanding, calling our office when she was ultimately fired from her job.
Toni-Anne is just one of nearly two million New Yorkers balancing the health care of their loved ones and their jobs. As the number of New Yorkers requiring care increases and the population of informal caregivers grows, the City's Human Rights Law must be amended to extend protection against employment discrimination to all New Yorkers who are actual or perceived caregivers.
Although New York City has some of the best anti-discrimination laws in the country, this is another example of where we have fallen sadly behind. The District of Columbia and Alaska have enacted legislation to expand protections in the workplace. And, in February of last year, both a Senate bill in California and a House bill in Pennsylvania were introduced that would prohibit workplace discrimination on the basis of “familial status.”
This Mother's Day, let's show caregivers how much they mean to us with more than flowers. We need to support our hardworking caregivers by encouraging local representatives to pass the caregiver bill. Our moms, and all caregivers, deserve it.
GuitarGuy, I am one of the fortunate ones who works for a company that has understanding executives and is even allowing AD lunch caregroups to be formed to help each other! It is wonderful to know that they understand when I have to be late, or take off to take him to doctor's appointments, and listen to me when I need to talk, and ignore me when I stay at my desk and don't look up (when he's had a bad night, I have a rough morning). Ive been feeling bad this week because two people on my floor (one had a AD mother and the other an AD FIL) lost their AD parent. Last week another lost an AD MIL after TEN years in a nursing home. Now I'm the only one left on my floor that is a caregiver. There are 92 others in the company, that I found out when I asked Human Resources to take a count. When they found out how many, they decided to offer a place for us to meet on our lunch hours once a month. There will be enough different days so that the groups will not be more than 15-18. I know how fortunate I am to work where I do!
When people say, "Hi, how are you?" My reply is "hanging in there" I NEVER say "fine!"
Hello you guys, I have been on the negative end of this issue...I signed up for FMLA leave as soon as I qualified for it.
Originally, my husband was DX in October 07/Severe to profound dementia. I was a MESS! I asked for a short LOA, which I was granted. I asked for a schedule of 4 12 hour days and was denied. I waited until January, when I qualified for FMLA and re-applied for a 4 day work week. After their attys looked at the papers, I was granted FMLA, 4 day work week, no reduction in workload.
My boss was PISSED! Entire company was PISSED! They let me know with both barrels that it was against their policy to allow part-time managers and they are granting my request only because they HAD to by LAW. They predicted my failure in no uncertain terms.
My FMLA was started the week of Feb 12th 2008. Funny, I was given a horrible performance review on March 30 (after glowing reviews previously). I was told that they had more and more work they wanted to put on my shoulders, but this 4 day work week was hindering this. They had a fully trained manager in Phoenix that wanted a transfer and was willing to work the 50-60 hours they require, so would I please just step aside.
I was so hurt, I had just started to get my emotions under control and this was just too much to bear. I started crying. Bad move. I ended up just resigning to get out of there, as I was a mucousy mess.
Took me awhile to get on my feet again financially. I am at a job that again, I had a crises at home and was forced to tell my boss what I was dealing with.(Her mom has AD) She told me that she felt I lied during the interview when asked if I can work the schedule set forth. I now have full-time home aid, but shit happens sometimes!!! I rarely miss work, I work extra hours whenever needed, I have 60 hours of homeaid help, and yet I always feel like I am under the suspicion of being high maintenance because I am a caregiver to a disabled and sick man.
I find this situation pretty crappy. I NEVER discuss my personal issues with anyone at work, especially my boss. Sympathy I know is there, until it is inconvenient. Let me tell ya, dementia is ALWAYS inconvenient.
Hey Guitar Guy, I did talk to the Dept of Labor when this all went down and they felt nothing illegal was done. If I wanted to pursue it, the most I could hope for was re-instatement, into a company that just didn't want me there. It was an hour from home, so when I worked even 4 12 hour days...48 hrs a week..add on another 10 hrs for drive time. It was just too hard and exhausting to contemplate. My job now is closer to home, but I am very leary of the workplace. Times are tough now and we all need our jobs. Rambling now..so have a good day, everyone!
Yes I understand. What gets me is that maybe there was nothing illegal done, (at least not yet) but it certainly is immoral! How can giving care to someone be treated this way? I will never understand that!
A FLA complaint needs to be directed to the EEOC, they are an agency of the federal government. See the website Guitar Guy noted at www.eeoc.gov. They can and will help you.
If you are employed by a company who has or participates in contracts funded by the federal government, you employer is classified as a "Federal Contractor" and gets additional scrutiny from the EEOC on fair employment practices.
The size of an employer may have a lot to do with how you are treated on the job. My employer is a large national "Federal Contractor". The larger companies with full time HR people are much more sophisticated and FLA savvy than small businesses. The managers or owners of these small businesses may not be aware of their responsibilities under the FLA or you may have young inexperienced management that concentrates only on "meeting the numbers". We frequently run into the issues with small sub contractors that do not realize that they are also "Federal Contractors".
Our company is more than flexible with adjusting work hours and schedules to accomodate those of us who are caregivers or who have spouses who need our help. They have told us to use up our sick time first in half day increments, if we have to be off to take a spouse to the doctor etc. to charge that absence to sick leave even though it is our spouse who is ill. Next we use up vacation time in half day increments. If we are off less than two hours, we don't have to charge any sick leave or vacation time at all. I have had very good luck with scheduling appointments very late in the afternoon, this helps minimize the time away from work. I am very fortunate to work for this company. Don't get me wrong we still have to do our jobs and meet our deadlines, but the important thing is they are flexible.
The other thing to remember about FLA is that the company is not required to pay you for the time you are off, they are only required to make a reasonable accomodation for your situation. There should be a poster in your workplace advising you of your rights under the Family Leave Act.
I am the Regional EEO Manager for my company, if I can help any of you out, please let me know.
Then again, having been a small business owner, you have to look at the other side. What do you do when 4 of the 45 employees have a baby the same month? What do you do when the only two people who can do payroll are both gone at the same time? How do you keep the wheels turning? We always managed to accommodate people, but it often wasn’t easy. The employees, in turn, always did their best to fill in where needed. A lot of it depends on the attitude people take. If it’s an adversarial attitude, nobody wins.
Anyone who wants to discriminate can and will, and they usually can get away with it.
Not to mention, filing a lawsuit is very time-consuming, expensive, and stressful beyond words. Which is one reason the employer can usually get away with flouting the law. (I think Patti would have to be out of her mind to go after her former employer. She simply cannot get enough out of it to make it worth the emotional turmoil and stress.)
I imagine jimmy is right, that a very large company is more likely to follow the letter of the law. However, I do think it comes down to the specific manager involved, too. If the manager is a s**t, s/he can make the job miserable enough, and make the employee look bad enough, and document things purely in compliance, and poof! there goes the employee.
I also think that smaller companies with good management are much more likely to be understanding, and flexible, and not only meet the letter of the law, but also the intent ... and perhaps even go above and beyond.
I think it's a really good idea to check around to see how the company you work for has treated people in the past, when trying to decide how you should handle your own particular situation.
I agree with Lori ... the attitude of the employees can make a huge difference when it comes to what the company can and will do.
If you need to file a claim against your employer under the Family Leave Act, you should file it with the EEOC, they will investigate it quickly (compared with a lawsuit). They also have the power to assess monetary damages against an employer.
This is the quickest, most efficient and cost effective way to file a FLA complaint. By using the EEOC to pursue your complaint you won't have to hire an Attorney.
Lori...I have been a small business owner also. It is sometimes very difficult to juggle maternity, fmla etc. The most successful companies that I have observed are the ones that are fluid and flexible and committed to their employees as members of the "company family". I encouraged and developed "part-time" managers, as there is a huge talent pool in that group and they were the ones that could really help out during "fulltime" managers loa. Many volenteered to move to fulltime during anothers absence.
Anyway, thank you all for your thoughts and support.