Divvi: You have a neat way of expressing yourself on delicate subjects. Looking back on our life (me & dw) 50 + yrs, I could not have imagined that we would ever find ourselves in this situation. My wife was very beautiful and also very modest (very) so seeing her change this much is just unimaginable.
It seems to me that you ladies have patience and a good sense of humor & caring. I still think that you handle things better than I do.
Dean, the 'patience and good humour didnt come lightly:) by the time you give in and accept you are in the hands of the AD demon without recourse, you are well into your jouney sometimes. i know its the same fustration for you guys dealing with incontinence issues with the dw. maybe even moreso -we ladies did diaper duty when our kids were young i guess that helps. (i know you fellas did some diapering the kids too:)? divvi
I don't know if this idea would help anyone but I get disposable "chucks" (bed pads) and put one on each side of the toilet and one in front. When he misses the toilet the chucks catches it and the floor stays clean and also the bottom of the toilet. He has used the trash can also so I keep a chuck under it too. May not be the best decorating advise but it works for me.
One night he peed on the doggie bed with the doggie in it. Poor doggie!....Gail
When I moved Lynn into the nursing home I had to scrub the whole room. Even though I was diligent, there was still times I didn't catch him. What shocked me was when I was getting out my summer clothes. I store them in the big plastic storage tubs with covers. He had a bathroom right outside the door and 3 trash can right in his room, yet he opened each of those storage tubs and peed all over my clothes. I wont mention what else I found in there.... eeek! Needless to say I had to throw everything out!
When I placed him in the NH, I told them that he will pee anywhere. I guess they didn't believe me lol. At this months care plan meeting they told me he was peeing in the trash can, and they were going to remove it from his room. I told them I wouldn't do that if I were you.... he will open the burrow drawer and pee in there instead! The trash can is still in his room LOL
Nikki, my husband did the same thing....in fact I think I told all of you already about the time he peed into a floor fan while it was running....talk about a mess.....!
i am surprised he didnt get electrocuted! :) thats an alrighty then for sure.
i think the worst pee moment so far besides going over the balcony onto the artwork gallery below, was the time i had DH in the grocery store with my grandaughters and we stopped to pick up some goodies. my 17yr took DH with her to get some chips and i took my 7yr old with the basket-17yr old called me on her cell '2 isles away' and said DH was peeing all over the cheetos in her isle. OMG . divvi
We've "talked" about how smart animals are. One night shortly before I decided to divorce my ex, our German Shepard got up on the bed and peed on him (twice that night). What a mess that was to clean up - glad it wasn't something else. To this day I have no clue why she did that but obviously she knew something.
Now, I can laugh about it, it wasn't so funny at the time. My husband went through the stage of peeing in all kinds of inappropriate spots. Coming here is what finally taught me that it was not an unusual thing for the disease.
Divvi, thank you for my laugh out loud this morning! I can just picture you and your husband and granddaughters!
Our worse experience to date was in Linens and Things...he filled the Depends (must not have had it tucked in right) and then got his pants and was still flowing down his legs while Diane walked in front of him and I walked behind him out to the car, let him finish, then get in the car and take him home to bathe and change him. I went back to the store the next day by myself to purchase what we went after in the first place! That was when we learned to take him to the restroom before going anywhere, and if going to a restaurant or movie, take him immediately afterwards too, before going home. (just like a toddler)
I've had a brainstorm....after this is over with, for we who are here and those who are widows/widowers, we need to get together and write a situation comedy (dark, of course) showing all areas of this caretaking...the anger, the indifference, the driving situations(some of the tales are humorous even though the situation is dire), the incontinence issues, the stiff joints when trying to dress them, the sweets and nuts and other dietary delights, getting them to wear Depends, etc. I can envision at least one year's worth of shows that could be done WITH GOOD TASTE and not ACTUALLY showing but describing certain "events" - and it would be educating the main stream, if done right....NEVER making fun of the AD person...always showing them with love and respect and warmth, but showing the hassle, headaches, lack of sleep, medications, re-directlng, etc. of the caregivers. It might even help get caregivers the financial aid they need.
And several situations that Divvi and Sandi have described would have to be included....<grin> Never names or states or anything else....just circumstances....to help other caregivers in the future....and we would work in our "what I wish I had known at stage 3 and 4" as well.... I'll get started on it in my spare time......<grin>
i have one in particular that takes the cake of ALL AD issues that could possibly ever come up. its never going to be told unless i am schoscled out of my mind sometime -:) and then i will regret it. my DH is quite the humourist before and after AD! divvi
Mary that would make for some intersting work i must say!
I was trying to explain to my Physical Therapist today how AD is not only "memory loss". It's behavioral changes, loss of motor skills and all of the other things we've experienced. Silly girl...asked me..."Like" Whaaaat??? Whaaat do they do". I began softly telling of shaving with toothpaste on the face, brushing teeth with Groom n Clean, squirting Shave cream in armpits instead of deodorant, lodging his hearing aid far up his nostril, wearing jockey shorts on top of pj's., peeing in trash cans, (hadn't read this post then) and the other child like behaviors we witness. Then about eating, cutting their food into bite size pieces, using cups that won't tip over, bibs, ice cream and sweets and finger foods. She was astonished! She said she had absolutely no idea that A.D. patients did any of this. She thought the worst thing was they'd forget the names of their children.
I think the male spouses here are getting cheated of some of the 'fun' you women (I haven't gotten there yet) are having out there. That is one thing with men - they can whip it out anywhere.
ok, schlosled (loaded/smashed) any other synonym for drunk.
there was some discussion about starting a thread named ' AD spouses and Viagra'... and see if anyone had any issues with this particular subject.:) feel free to add any 'stories' -
all i can say is if you have any 'little blue pills' laying around the house get rid of them asap! you dont want to have to make an ER run for a particular 'issue' if you get my drift.:)
as a matter of fact ANY other meds you have make sure they are stored where you spouse cant get to them! you cant trust them not to take meds if they find them. Divvi
I'M TEASING, EVERYONE!!! DIVVI IS NOT DRUNK!!!! I just read her thread and her last entry, and thought it was funny....She had said she wouldn't tell unless she was drunk, so I was teasing her......
Mary, our beloved divvi is good at whatever she sets out to do, so if she intended to get schloschled, I wouldn't expect it to take her long. (-: Let's see, who would we get to play divvi in our TV version of "Life With AD?"
i can bypass the glass once i get started and go strait to the bottle.:) works faster. isnt there a word 'schlossed' for drunk or did i make up a new word?
folly i'd like to know who'd play me too. i'd have to break them in first though, reallllly good to make sure they get the real touch to AD caregiving!