Dear friends, and i feel as if I've known all of you for along time even if I've never met any of you. You have been there for me. My loved one had a very hard struggle and fought it beautifully. His family was with him , we put the phone up to his ear to have his son speak to him for the last time as he spokem he responded by squeezing my hand. he had not open his eyes or spoke for two days.I am so comforted to know he is at peace and the struggle has ended. I miss him so much. thank you dear dear friends for all the advise and concern you have shown me I will never forget the evilness of this disease. NANAPAPA
How kind you are to even think of thanking others at this difficult time. I am so glad that he was able to have family near at the end. Please know that others are thinking of you and hope that you too can find some peace. It is time to take care of yourself now.....
Oh, nanapapa, I'm so sorry. May God continue to give you the peace you seem to have now. He's no longer suffering from this evil disease. Stay here with us, if you can. We really care.
I am so sorry for your loss. It is so hard to repeatedly lose our loved ones to this nightmare disease. The comfort that comes with the end of their struggle, knowing they are at peace is something to hang on to. Know that we are with you in spirit.
Dearest nanapapa, I am so very sorry for your loss. I know it is a relief to have him freed from his suffering, but still, it leaves such a big hole in your heart.
Sweet Nanapapa, words cannot express my sadness over your loss. My prayers will continue to be with you and your family during this time. Thank you for taking the time to let us know. Stay with us as you go through your grieving. We are friends who need you. Knowing that he is now at peace helps us get through the pain of our loss of our spouse. May you find your peace in the coming days.
I am so sorry to hear of your dear husband's passing, but rejoice in knowing that he is at peace and his struggle is over. Take time to heal and take good care of yourself.
((Nanapapa)) I am so very sorry for your loss. I am however grateful that your dear husband is no longer suffering. It must have been a great comfort to be surrounded by family. Keep them close, know that your family here is with you as well. Lifting you up in prayer, Nikki
My heart goes out to you and your family, there is comfort in knowing his struggle is over, it is now time to take care of yourself. We will be here for you as you start your new journey.
Nanapapa, my prayers and sympathy is with you and your family during this difficult time. Please take care of yourself and come here often. We will all be here for you.
NanaPapa I am so sorry. That was a sweet thoughtful thing with calling his son and having people with you when you leave this world for a better place of peace and disease free.
You have my deepest sympathy for your loss... How wonderful that you will have that beautiful memory of him responding to you by squeezing your hand before he passed.
I, too, will be thinking of you, Nanapapa. I'm glad to know that he was able to hear the voice of his son and to squeeze your hand at that time. Also, that you were able to be with him. Hoping that you will be able to rest now and begin a new journey of healing.
Nanapapa, we too are saddened at your loss and dispair of losing your DH. Its been said that right before passing the person becomes quite lucid for the last minutes and somehow can convey they are ready to leave this earth and to the glory awaiting. my sincere condolences to you and your family -divvi
May your days be filled with peace now as you heal your inner spirit. Your DH knows you were his special soldier. I am so saddened by your loss. God bless you and you family.
Over a 150 years ago the deathbed scene was considered a sacred moment. A very personal event that specifically involved as many family members as could be present for the passing. It was a threapeutic moment to help cope with the inevitable.
Somewhere in all our medical advances of paramedic transport to a hospital, performing CPR and heroic care, a real piece of humanity was lost.
What a beautiful thing that you were able to be together during the most important time in the human experience. Very inspirational, thank you for sharing it with us.
May all your daydreams be just happy memories. Jim
Nanapapa.......I am so sorry for the sadness you must be feeling and the emptiness in your heart. Time has a way of letting us....in time....live with our loss, but we never forget. We always wish we could say something or do something that brings comfort but we know there isn't anything but to let you know that there are many, many hearts out here that mourn with you. I wish I could give you a hug but in my heart I am.........Anitalynn
06/24/2010 My husband passed away last night. He had conjestive heart failure, kidney disease, copd, pneumonia, and dementia. He went into acute resperatory distress at the nursing home. We sent to him to the emergency room and he had another heart attack. They took an x-ray and his whole left side of chest was filled with fluid. They told me it was best to let him go as he was suffering. So we didn't give him any fluids or tube feeding and they gave him oxygen and morphine and ativan. He lingered for three days with the comfort care and drew his last breath last night. I was glad I was there. I was also glad he died at the hospital instead of at that lousy alzheimers unit alone. I feel he is at peace and in a better place. I told him it was okay to go and that I would see him again and I loved him. Our journey with this miserable disease has ended but I know all of you have a road to travel. Some short, some long. My husband was diagnosed in November 2009 as borderline and the alzheimers progressed quickly. I don't know if the drugs they gave him for the disease hastened the disease or not. It was horrible seeing him slouched over in a wheel chair, slobbering and not being abel to answer me. His face was puffing up. Even the back of his neck. When he went to the hospital all the edema went away before he passed. He also had started refusing foods the last week. This has been a horrible time but now I'm glad he's gone. No more suffering, no more wondering how he is being treated. Many times I wish I was a fly on the wall in the nursing home. My husband had health issues and was in bad shape. To me it seemed they put his mattress on the floor and ignored him. I went in there fathers day and I found him on the floor with the door shut in a wet diaper and the posey alarm not working. I asked why is the door shut? They said one of the other residents must have shut the door. So there he lay on the tile floor for who knows how long wet and the alarm not working. If it did work they wouldn't have heard it with the door shut. If you have to place your loved one be vigilant. We weren't treating his problems aggressively because of the age 82 and the dementia, but no one should suffer. This one was supposed to be trained in treating these patients but it sure doesn't seem like it I was not impressed. You can't be there 24/7. If you could you might as well keep them home and hire a aide to help you. Nursing homes suck and to see all the patients in there basically waiting to die sucks. They have to come up with a better system. Thank you all and I hope your journey is better.
(((((Porkhck))))) - I would think all his conditions contributed to the fast decline. that said, he is healed now. Now is the time for you to start healing. Prayers will be with you for the days, weeks and months ahead.
My deepest sympathy. Thoughts and prayers for you and your family. Thank goodness you were there to protect him.
Another way to help channel your grief would be to make sure that the substandard care that you described above does not happen to another resident. While the story re door closed by patient may be real, the alarm not working, patient on the floor are reportable incidents. If God gives you the strength, please report your findings to your state board of health or elder advocate.
I am glad your husband is at peace. May you also find comfort and peace knowing what a wonderful wife you were.
Sincere sympathy to you and your family at this difficult time. I agree when you are stronger you must report the substandard care your DH received at the hands of this staff.
Porkhck, I offer my sincere sympathy to you and your family. He is at peace now and you can begin looking for that same peace as you heal in the days ahead. Bless you.