I invite you to log onto the home page - www.thealzheimerspouse.com - and read today's blog. It is an updated version of my guide for traveling with an AD spouse. Since Thanksgiving is coming, and I am traveling, I thought it would be a good resource for all of our members, both old and new.
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After you read the blog, please post your comments and own suggestions here.
Thank you. I'm off to ANOTHER doctor's appointment with Sid.
Everyone: Another tip-----actually from a Continental flight attendant---make sure your disabled spouse is seated by the window in an airplane, not by the aisle. My DH decided to stand up and get something out of the overhead bin on a recent flight while we were on the runway in line to take off, and only because we were traveling with several men from our church who happened to be sitting across the aisle from him were we able to get him seated!!!!! The next trip I sat him by the window, and although he complained about that, no trouble!
Also, we are traveling the day after Thanksgiving and our local airport has started a "family" checkin security line, which is also available for disability. We'll probably use that, although my DH likes to wave at all the children, so that should be interesting. I'll let you know how it goes. If too eventful, this may be our last flight trip.....
The best idea is to hold everything and only hand it to your Spouse when they need it and then take it right back. I say we need to keep everything in one place so we can find it easy and he is okay with that. The one time I didn't grab his boarding pass back after going through the first check to board a bus to go out to the plane, he lost it from the door going out side to the bus. ??????? How does one do that? It was all of 20 feet or so. I also go first through the airport and make him hold onto my backpack as I march us as quick as possible to our connection. I have to be confident of where I am going without questioning if it is the right way or he will get very anxious and agitated, quickly swinging into anger if anything goes wrong. I try to visit the airports online and get my bearings before hand. Some have virtual online views such as the airport in Rome. We went last Feb. to see our baby granddaugher born in Naples, Italy and it was so hard on him from the long time traveling to the change in time that I'm sure that was our last long trip. Very unfortunate as the babies are now in Japan for four years and that will be hard not to be able to go visit. Perhaps we could make it to Hawaii and they could meet us there. I have hope of that scenario.
We live in the Pacific NW and our son wants us to stay with him in Missouri for a month this spring. Our son here said he'd keep our kitty for us while we're gone. So, that worry is settled.
We'd have to change planes. I'll try and get a routing with as little layover as possible. If we go, I'll send our stuff via UPS or FedEx rather than on the plane and take as little as possible as carry on. I always hang onto tickets, passports, picture ID's, etc. whenever we go anyplace. He can lose something in the wink of an eye and I sure don't want to have to frisk him down in a security line. One time we went through an airport, he left his belt in the little box. Had a heck of a time until we got on the cruise ship and we could buy him a new one. I will ask to have him at the window seat. Hopefully we can get the two-seat configuration rather than the three-seat. I HATE the middle seat.
I really want to go visit our son and his family but I'm sure not looking forward to the trip. I don't know how many more of these we will be able to take back there.
I couldn't find the thread I started on during our trip, so guess this will work. Naturally, I won't remember what I did or didn't discuss, but I do recall feeling very low the last time I wrote anything.
The cruise from Barcelona to Miami was very nice..we had perfect weather with rain just one day of the three weeks. Looking back, g made it okay as long as we had designated activities such as tours, but he refused to get off the ship otherwise. We had two beautiful days in Bermuda, but he wouldn't budge except for the short tour around the Island. I was going to just go alone, but knew he would really make me regret it, so I just fumed. We had some rocky seas occasionally which he loved, as he felt everyone else was walking as he does normally. Afternoon tea was usually a high light as there was chocolate and soothing music with everyone being quiet and mellow.
We made "friends" with two couples who had first hand experience with some form of dementia, and both were delightful and very easy to be with for both of us. One couple was traveling with her parents (mother just dx with EOAD). They were full of questions for both of us..which were answered in kind. I gave them this website and explained the importance of it, and it was very gratefully received.
I had concerns about problems in the airports, but had zero incidents. I did carry the Doc. letter and Divvi's translation, but fortunately did not need either. By the by, Divvi, I found my spanish returned somewhat when I got lost in Barcelona...quite a kick! We both wish we could re-do Barcelona...what a lovely city, but we were fairly well hotel bound with G's reluctance to explore. The Portuguese island of Madiera is paradise...absolutely no negatives from a tourist point of view. Lovely setting, temperature, people and foliage to make one smile. Tangiers and the casbah were another, more depressing, story. The camel rides didn't appeal, so we just did the tourist gawk at the sights.
I would surely encourage taking a cruise at this stage of the illness, but having others around for activities would have been a huge plus. I read a book a day on board, but that is fairly normal for me vacationing. Actually, I wasn't ready to be home with day to day stuff already starting, but here we are. Yesterday was the FIRST time ever that I haven't had turkey day...loved going to the kids house for it!
We have already had a nasty quarrel, so I know we are back to normalcy ;-).
Our youngest son is graduating from Colorado State next Friday so we're leaving Thursday morning to fly down there, returning Sunday. I'm packing today, combing through this list of suggestions and getting my ducks in a row. After our last air trip I vowed NEVER again. Getting through security is absolutely the worst. This time I have help as my oldest son will accompany us. Given how much worse DW is doing, two of us may not be enough !!! DW's "helpful" oldest sister told her we were going on a trip (not a good idea) so DW has been packing and unpacking for 5 days now. Who'da thunk you could wear clothes out without even wearing them? Anyway, I'm not exactly looking forward to this but I wouldn't miss the event for anything. My son is graduating with a Masters in....... Music Therapy. His research and thesis has been working with ALZ patients. Thenneck
Thenneck, You must be so proud of your son especially his working with AZ patients. I pray you and your eldest son will have an easy time with your DW and that you all have a wonderful time in Colorado. As for your wife's older sister...some people just aren't too bright no matter what you explain to them. I am SLOWLY learning with my DH and he is not that bad yet. Have a safe and event free trip and God Bless
We are scheduled for a cruise in january with some good friends, and hopefully, again in October. The problem though is that I will no longer go alone with DH. I'll only go with another couple, or in August, we went with my dD and her family. I just can't manage the stress of trying to keep him safe all alone. I'll go to the airport with him Ok, but then I need to be picked up, I'm just now up to being alone. Kathi, I give you credit for going with just the two of you.
We are leaving tomorrow for Texas for a granddaughter's high school graduation. I tried to check in on line. I checked my DH in fine. I was not allowed to check in. This has happened the last 3 times we traveled. I take care of all travel arrangements and it makes it more difficult if I have to get in line to check in. I called the airline and was told TSA controls check in. She told me if I called them I could get them to clear me and get me off the list. I think the problem is my name is so common, kind of like Jane Doe. But DH also has a common name. I have started the paper work for TSA. That will take 45 to 60 days. i spent a long time ironing and folding clothes today and left them on our bed. DH went in the bedroom while I was doing something else and put everything away, in the dresser drawers. I am starting this trip already stressed. Let's hope nothing else goes wrong.
If you have not already done so, request a wheelchair for your husband. The wheelchair attendant will take care of everything for you - checking in, getting you through security. No lines. We do it all of the time because Sid can't walk due to his diabetic foot condition, but I advise everyone with an AD spouse to do it. They can't get lost either, and if they have to go to the bathroom, the attendant will either go in with them or wait right outside the bathroom for them.
During my research on preparing proper documentation of DH's meds for our recent trip, I found out persons with disabilities or special needs are excluded from having to take their shoes off if in a wheelchair at the airport per TSA website. Saved me from having to explain taking his shoes off and having to put them back on with 500 people trying to do the same thing at the end of the security checkpoints. Funny thing is that only few TSA agents were aware of this exception. As insensitive as they are, I was not going to back down.