Quite a while ago I asked what caregivers had done (or are still) doing for a living. What did your spouse do? My husband was in human resources and received a national award for excellence.
My husband was a senior engineer for 25 years, he has not been able to work in his field for 4 years. He is working but has no responsibility and it is not in his field.
My wife has a masters degree in Biochemistry. She worked while I was in medical school, then raised three children, volunteered in girl scouts, church, AAUW, etc. She was an avid reader and worked the daily crossword puzzle.
DH was a Senior Buyer for a defense contractor, and for a period was also a contracts adminstrator for same corporation. He retired early, but for 9 years post retirement he was frequently called back under private contract as his expertise was so needed by them. Now????? OMG! So devastating to know what he could do....and now cannot.
My husband has a PhD from Caltech, taught at Rice and Claremont then was an administrator at the AMS. Retired to "do mathematics" for some years. I have taught kids and adults, most recently spending 20 years at Brown U. helping people in the administration with their computer work.
My husband had a Masters Degree PLus (course work for doctorate) also was a air force pilot, missile officer, for ten years, and then taught accelerated high school history. I say all this because sometimes I r ead that uneducated people are more susceptible to Alzheimers than highly educated individuals. In my experience, I haven't found this to be true.
My husband has an aeronautical/astronautical engineering degree. He was a pilot for a number of years, then a flight instructor. When he retired, he was the program manager for flight and maintenance training for Air Force One.
My husband designed contact lenses. If you were them he probably designed the ones you wear, or he knew the people who did design them. The Contact Lens world is a small town; everyone knows everyone else. At various times he ran manufacturing plants, or research labs. At his last job he also did building security and management.
Hsbd was a minister for 27 years; then a social worker; then a subsitute teacher for awhile. Sometimes thinks he could do any of that still. We've all learned that no form of dementia is a respecter of persons.
My DH was a natural born engineer, took a few college classes after Korea because we needed the $50 from the G.I. Bill, but essentially started a transformer company in our garage with a bag of nuts & bolts he bought at a military outlet store. Eventually he had his own business of mfg transformers that went into all the early space shots. When you heard, 'that's one small step' or 'Houston, we have a problem' those words came thru a small transformer he designed and manufactured that was part of the communication systems. He also designed and patented a toridal winding machine--it winds a long, long copper wire a specific number of times thru the hole of different sizes of a donut shape, sometimes small as a Cheerio. He had all sorts of mathematic formulas in his head, kept up with accts payable & receivable, understood all the employee requirements in running a business, etc. Brought home one of the first computers, put it on the kitchen table, read the instructions and programmed it by himself for all his inventory, etc. Then taught his employees how to use it. We were heavy into amateur auto racing and he kept several race cars running and winning trophies. As a teenager he could take apart & reassemble any GM engine blindfolded. He was always there for me & the kids. He had the world's greatest smile and he loved me. Too bad he didn't take expert advice & do crossword puzzles, if he'd kept his mind stimulated, maybe he'd have avoided AD!
My husband was at various times a minister, builder/contractor (13 houses), and ended up the last 25 years beginning a business with a friend. The business grew into the largest in the US and does millions of dollars of international business now. He left the business some time ago but several members of our family are still involved. He can/could figure out how to do anything. He has always done all our auto and home repairs/remodeling. He is an educated man who has always been hi energy. He never met a stranger and remembered people's names and the names of their children for decades and would recognize them instantly. I always said I never took him anywhere that he didn't know someone. I was proved right during a vacation to the Italian Alps - we were walking up a trail and he looked at a man walking toward us and called out happily, "George! How nice to see you!". It was someone he'd met briefly years ago - George and I were both shocked and amazed.
My DW was the girl friday for an accounting firm.. Did the firms internal accounting handled the insurences, payroll,, hired and fired the support staff, handled the manegment of the building and property... set up partner seminars and worked about 10-12 hrs a day..... As Bettyhere said... should have done more to keep her mind active, maybe she would have avoided AD....What a shame has happened to this group of talented individules, thanks for sharing there successes
My husband was the News Director for 4 radio stations. He reported the news and traffic in morning and afternoon drive shifts, while playing comic side kick and trivia buff to the announcers. That was his day job. In his heart he always considered himself an actor first...mostly theatre, but some minor films. He was a marvelous theatrical director, so very creative. While in his 20s he worked full-time as an actor and actually made a living wage. He toured the Scandanavian countries for 6 weeks as a cast member in a show called "One Mo' Time", a musical review. One of his favorite proud moments was being a contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" (Regis Philban). After reading posts after this one, it reminded me that my husband has an urban public high school education (lots of kids; few teachers/resources) and a couple of semesters of college, but he is one of the most wide-read individuals I have ever met. In fact, he taught himself how to read when he was 4 years old. His father used to bring him down to the barbershop on Saturdays and sit him up on the counter so he could read the newspaper aloud so the men in the shop who didn't know how to read would know what was going on. I often joke that he has more intelligence in his little fingernail than I'll ever have no matter how many degrees I earn.
I am posting this again for those who have not seen it--a list of prominent people (or relatives of prominent people) who have AD. There's not a couch potato in the bunch. Click on 'You're in Good Company'.
My husband was a high school teacher of vocational education for 36 years. He taught mechanics, soil sciences and crop management, livestock production, horticulture and one year, with the help of the local florist, taught floral design of all things! For several years, before and after he retired from school, he managed a local ranch. He was recognized as a cattle expert and was invited to judge major livestock shows throughout the state.
Recordkeeping for the ranch was possibly the first indicator of troubles. Although we rationalized that he had so much other work to do, or he was never that organized, etc. Gosh, that possibly was before 2000. He would have been about 58 at that time.
My husband was a bank president and then a real estate developer in California. He was in the air force and flew privately for 50 years. Last year he realized he couldn't take a chance on flying anymore and sold his plane. That was a sad day.
Degrees in Chemistry, business, and law. Senior VP of a Fortune 100 company by his mid-30's, responsible for international acquisitions and divestitures. Got tired of the big corporation mentality, and left to start several small high-tech businesses.
International plaintiffs trial lawyer, private pilot for 40yrs, had photographic memory, and whos who in lawyers digest. held a high public office at 29yrs old right out of college,this guy absorbed more intellect than most in a lifetime- and could recite pages of shakespeares soliliguies by heart- i do feel the smarter they are the harder they fall with regards to AD.
My DH was also an attorney for almost 30 years practicing in Houston, and was known as one of the top employment lawyers in the state. The last case he argued, in Dec. before his January diagnosis, he won, although the court reporter told me months later she suspected something was wrong. Then, a week before his diagnosis, he filed a brief for an employer/client that was favorably ruled on several months later, and the client told me it was primarily due to my DH's stellar reputation, even though the court that eventually ruled on the case knew about his eventual diagnosis! I think the smarter they are the better they are at coping/hiding it from others! I actually took him this past weekend to a big get-together at his law school and he saw many old friends and seemed to have a good time, but it was obvious to everyone that it will be his last trip back. It was so sad, both for me (actually it was exhausting for me, but that's another thread----any more plane trips????) and also for many there who have known him even longer than I have.....since he's only in his 50s, some of his professors are still involved in the law school and I could tell it was difficult for them to see him like this.
I began this thread and have learned so much from it. It does seem the brighter individuals have more brain power to spare and can cover up longer. Such a terrible waste of wonderful people. I often think we may be more aware of the disease than the experts. Their focus is more narrow-just their field of study rather than the complete picture.
Even though my hubby never got the degrees and elevated profiles so many entered here have, I think he still fits in with them. He started life with broad spectrum learning disabilities, before anyone klnew anything about them or how to help those with them. At school he wasz often put at the back of the room and when disruptive (being ignored might be a reason?) he was allowed to help the custodian. Always big for his age, he often helped farmers in the surrounding area. While in school he gleaned a lot--history was a whole woreld of fascinating stories. He learned best hands on, and when we married he took care of the cars, the small machines (mower, etc.), and built tables and storage shelves to fit the space and use--no blueprints. One of the Drs. testing him when we were fighting for his Workers Comp. remarked on his extensive vocabulary--knows AND uses the words properly. He was always a pro at covering his learning deficits. Many knew he had limitations but NEVER how severe. I've always wondered what he could have done/been if the learning disabilities hadn't been in the way. The onset of his Mental Illness came early, but he managed and covered a lot of its effects as well, for a long time. Then prolonged exposure to a work environment where there was blatant disregard for simple accomodations (tell him don't expect him to read and know) and coworker harassment pushed him into a breakdown. He went on Disability. Still we camped, he hunted and fished (and knew the rules); nothing really stopped him. But then he asked his psychiatrist if he could help with his memory. I knew he'd forgotten a few things but this surprised me. His Dr. suggesete Aricept for a 3 mo. saying, " If it helps it's Alzheimers, if not it's not." All the Aricept did was add to his agitation and irritability. It didn't help the memory at all. Extended exposure to his psych meds (18-19 years) triggered an electrolyte problem and the second time that landed him in the hospital more tests were done and his Dx was named--Vascular Dementia. So now he is a man whose brain is like an Apple computer trying to run Microsoft software; and which fails to receive everything correctly and responds inappropriately to what is received; but now has the blessing that he is forgetting and will contiue to forget it all.
He covered it all and functioned for years, not perfectly, but well. There oughta be a degree for that.
My DW was an elementary school teacher for 32 years -- primarily first and second grades. She was noted for her patience and kindness. She knew when she saw the vice principal at the door with a pupil in hand that for some reason he or she (usually a he) was selected for her room for a reason. I got a kick out of the way that she would mentor young new teachers. They would come out of college with all the latest therories but didn't know how to thread a projector. She provided them with a balance of experience and practicality.
Carosi-my brother-in-law and his wife developed the first computer. Their children were eligible for scholarships at their university. One of the three had learning disabilities and didn't go to college. He was wonderful with hands on stuff and was the most successful of the three. A college degree is only that-not a measure of a person's worth.
bluedaze--I know. With my physical disability and his mental ones, a lot looked askance when we got together. We meshed our abilities and made it work for a long time. I'm working hard to keep it that way as long as possible.
Do you think all the mental challenges of being a caregiver for someone with dementia are sufficient to help us stave it off? <grin>
My DH was in middle-mgmt @ the phone company for 32 years...he was a total "people" person & enjoyed that side of his job much more than the 'meetings' and 'admin' work that went along with it. Looking back, he struggled to work with computers when they came on-line; struggled to make deadlines with reports to the secy, etc. He was BEST @ just being a people person with his managers & non-mgmt employees...everyone we ever run into always says things like "it's not the same since you left"...and "you were the best boss I ever had"...He really was/is the sweetest man ever!! In High School, he befriended even those no-one would speak to...he was an all-around good guy! Very lovable!! Voted Sr. Favorite, Jr. Favorite, and runner-up in his sophomore year...At times, he is still, this sweet, lovable man...I miss our life...I hate this disease!!
My husband has degrees in sociology, forensic science (criminal justice), and a PhD in pharmacology. He was a professor of criminal justice - taught the scientific aspects of criminal investigation - for 30 years.
He was a machinist in the aerospace industry for over 38 years. He invented many safety tools and appliances for the metal cutters. He also designed and built most of our home.
My husband does not fit into the above profiles at all. He had to leave school at age 11 to go into an apprenticeship and at age 16, in a new country, he started working to help to support his family. He supported his brothers so that they could complete their schooling that had been denied him. In his spare time he learned English, took upgrading at school and became self-taught in all sorts of subjects. He became competent in all the trades, designed and helped build our beautiful home and took care of everything related to it. He became an avid organic gardener, classical music and opera lover. He eventually had his own business which sadly came to an end once he started experiencing memory loss. The impression that high levels of education and responsibility will save one from the ravages of this disease has certainly been dispelled by the history provided by most of you on this board.
Inge: your husband is a renaissaince man and I think he would have been a fascinating conversationalist . College degrees are not the only indicatiion of a person's intellectual capacity....your husband sounds like one whom used his fullest potential and I applaud him for it.
I would have said inge's husband fits very squarely in with the others -- wide-ranging interests and educated in multiple fields. Education is education, whether it comes from self-learning or from school. (I think you learn more if you teach yourself, rather than rely on being spoon-fed by teachers. And you REALLY learn more if you practice what you've learned, rather than just receive a degree.)
Janet, that is too cool. Forensic science is fascinating. It's amazing, what they can do nowadays.
This thread is so interesting. Very, very sad what has been lost. But what wonderful spouses we have!
My husband had an MBA, was a Navy Officer for 20 years. His line of work was in Supply dealing mostly with managing the Px's (they are called Exchages in the Navy), the Officer and Enlisted and Golf Clubs. He did one stint with the SeaBees in Dieago Garcia where he managed their building mission regarding supplies. He was given an award for that.
A year before he retired, his old boss from the SeaBees called and offered him a job - we weren't able to take it because we would lose our retirement. His old boss saved the job for that year and it was for managing the business office and procurement in Turkey for a coal power plant Turkey was building.
After that he was in Human Resources with several major companies for another 20 plus years. After that he went to shcool and got his contractor's liscense and did work on his own - redoing kitchens and bathrooms, etc. He worked alone. When he started having problems with ELECTRICAL AND PLUMBING we had a running argument for about a year before he finally gave up the business. He had the diagnosis of MCI then but I knew well before that something was amiss.
He spends his time now reading and working in the yard once a week and the rest of the time telling me what I have done wrong.
After graduating Summa Cum Laude from the university, my husband was an Army officer for 20 years, serving two tours of duty in Vietnam, one during the Tet offensive. After he got out of the Army, he worked for steamship lines in Houston for 10 years, before going to work for a major oil company. He had just retired from that job when I realized he was having problems.
My wife worked off and on as a receptionist/office admin. Her main job was mother and running the household. We will have been married 30 years on Nov 09. I have a tendency to over analyze everything. If I were reading this thread, I would conclude that high acheivers get Alzheimer's. I'm making this entry just for regular, middle America, hard-working people. I know each of us is proud of our spouses. I am, too. We are here, tragically, not for where we came from, but for where we are going. I do not mean this post to sound bitter or to critize anyone's post.
dking: I have also read that highly educated people do not get AD as often as less educated, so who knows. This dreaded disease affects so many people from so many different walks of life. Hang in there!
dking, I believe this thread was inspired by recently renewed claims that keeping your mind active will "prevent" AD ... as if it's your own fault if you get AD ... which is, of course, hogwash, and a very sore subject on this discussion forum. The people responding here are showing that one can have a very active mind and still fall victim to this disease.
Also, one should not confuse education with intelligence. The studies that showed a link between level of education and the likelihood of developing AD did NOT show a direct link, let alone cause-and-effect. It is entirely likely that the correlation is with the level of innate intelligence, and that a higher intelligence makes it possible to MASK cognitive impairment for a longer period of time. People with a lower level of innate intelligence tend to seek out less education, ON AVERAGE, than people with higher intelligence. People with a lower level of innate intelligence might have more trouble masking AD and therefore be diagnosed at a younger age. Ergo, it would appear that less education leads to a higher probability of developing AD, but that really hasn't been shown at all.
Sunshyne you are right again. I posted both threads-Dr. Gott and before AD. I am fed up with "blame the victim" I believe most of us on this site are over the "what if" and are bercoming more proactive. Couldn't have getten here without this site,
Husband was in the Marines for 5 years. That's the one thing he hasn't forgotten. Then he was a car salesman for 40 years. He was considered one of the best. He could find out more about a person in 5 minutes than most people can in an week. Everyone loved him and he got many letters from customers complimenting him on their car buying experience.
Husband was a car hauler for 55 yrs and that is what he remembers. It takes quite a knack to back the first car up over the trailer and on top of the cab of the truck in rainy or even worse icy metal ramps. He used to laugh because you could always know who the new person was. His car would end up on the ground in front of the truck. He drove triple trailers, cement trucks, molassas trucks he hauled chassis from Detroit to California. Very active physically and loved the open road. He only had an 8th grade education because he had to help on the farm. He did get his GED in the military. Have any of you seen a person park an 83foot tractor trailer (remember no windows so you can't turn around and look out the back) around the backside of a building on their blind side in between 2 other tractor trailers and do it on the first try. I have seen people try to parallell park a geo and can't do it after 3 tries. I was so proud of his driving abilities it made me burst my buttons when I would see him park his rig and come running to greet me. He also was always handy in the repair dept and now he just looks at a screwdriver in his hand trying to figure out if it was a new utinsel to eat with or what was this thing supposed to do. No degrees here no cap and gown ceremonies just a few million mile safe driving awards that are on display but I would not trade him for anyone else with all their certificates of higher education.
Jenene, my husband did a little big-rig driving way back in his youth. Every time he sees the really big trucks they have nowadays, he marvels that anybody could drive them. Negotiating a turn is tough enough, but backing into a crowded loading dock, wow! Me, I belong in the can't-parallel-park-a-geo category ... I'm in awe. You have good reason to be proud of his skills.
We have a lot of former sucessful people here on this board. Don't forget, "behind every successful man, there is a good woman" Reverse for a woman. I believe this too. We encouraged them and helped them through the years to help them succeed. So, give yourself a little pat on the back. Too bad, we can't take away the AD.
Yes, guys, please understand that if we describe a highly-educated person, it's not bragging - it's just identifying that high-achievers do indeed get "it." I'm always in awe of the love and pride that almost all of us have for our spouses (or did have), and THAT has NOTHING to do with education or achievement.
I think those articles stressing if you work a crossword puzzle every day, you won't get Alzheimer's; or if you exercise daily you can prevent it; and on and on.... - make us so furious! They seem to think that even though they still have no clue as to the cause of Alzheimer's, they know that if our loved ones had done these things, they would not have AD!!! That is why we stress the intelligence and physical abilities of our spouses (spice), not to brag at all - just to point out how wrong those idiots are in trying to give the uninformed hope that they won't get it.
Being a housewife and taking care of a home, cooking, cleaning, raising children, keeping schedules, driving kids to activities, keeping a household budget (or the whole families' budget) is like being a CEO of a company! It's ongoing and never stops and is 24 hours. I applaud those women most of all!
And, I applaud those of you who are staying at home and caring for your spouse! I am so glad I have a job and help at home!
Oh my I just re-read my post and I really did come off sounding defensive. I apologize. I don't want to edit my response but I guess we do go into a protective mode sometimes and want to give them away for the asking in the next bout with our dear spouses. I truly am sorry.