Welcome PaulB, I am sorry you have the need to join this forum, however, I am glad you found us. I am sure you will find everyone helpful. My husband is 58 years old with FTD.
Marygail, if you don't have a cat, you're still welcome and everyone here will still love you. However, you may feel a little left out when they start talking about cats. I borrowed some humor from a neighbor's kitten just to feel included. <grin>
Seriously, it's a great place to be if you have AD in your life. We laugh, cry, tell jokes, get angry, get desperate, share information and try to help each other through this awful disease.
Welcome to all the new members. It is good to see some new names under the posts, however, we are sorry you have to contend with this terrible disease.
Folly and MMarshall, you may think you're all caught up, but you're not.
Bengy just posted on What Are The Age Groups.
Bengy, I have been delegated to give The Official Welcome to newbies while Joan is on a caregiver cruise. (Having Joan actually delegate is absolutely amazing ... I'm still in shock.) Your Official Welcome is right under your post on What are the age groups.
I've lost count...don't know who I've welcomed and who I've not but we're happy to have all the new ones here. Please post often. This place is a life saver when you're dealing with AD.
Welcome Brady. You can party with us any time. Sunshyne will soon be along to do the whole dog and pony show. She will probably ask you about cats, too.
Brady sort of sneaked in while y'all weren't looking, about three weeks ago. I said "hi" back then, but I think Joan was running around too madly to give her an official welcome.
Brady, do you feel left out without one? 'Cause I can give you the whole shebang. I am the Officially Delegated Interim Alternative Welcome Wagon while Joan is off this week, cruising in the lap of luxury.
Or, to keep bluedaze from complaining that I'm failing in my duties and responsibilities, I can just ask you the all-important question:
Thanks for the welcome everyone. My DH ws diagnoised with Alz four yrs ago at age 58. He is now 61 and I am 53. He was doing pretty good until October of 2008 and thing started going down hill pretty rapidly. He snapped Jan 4 2009. He was admitted to the hospital and lost so many skills in 5 days that the Drs couldn't believe it. He no longer can walk or feed hemself. We came home from the hopsital 3 weeks later with hospice and a hospital bed in my great room. What litle sleep I get is on the sofa. It has been 3 weeks and he has just about quit eating and drinking the ensure.
Mrs T you are both so young for this to happen. Several of our "familly" have survived what you are going through and will hold your hand through the process. So sorry.
Welcome, Mrs. T. What a rapid decline. It's heartbreaking. Please know this is a safe place to say whatever's on your mind as you deal with the AD devil. You'll receive lots of support and understanding.
Hi Everyone. I'm afraid I may have just barged into this group without starting at "go". I haven't been on line very long, and posted a message, but didn't begin at the proper site. OR..maybe I'm invisable. That would fit in my life. My husband and I were married in 91, after his children and mine were grown. His children are totally out of this picture (Just tooooo busy!!) and I'm his 24/7 caregiver. He's going into Stage 6 and this is our 4th year of actual diagnosis. I can look back now, and know with certainty that he showed definite signs of AD back 8 years ago. The doctors thought he might have some after effects of a few TIA's and an intestinal hemorrhage he suffered. No one mentioned AD until we changed doctors. We go to a fantastic A.D. doctor at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston. After a week of clinical tests, blood tests which included the APo3 DNA tests, brain scans and interviews, she said there was no doubt it was AD. In a flash, our lives were changed forever.
It's like a bad dream. I'm glad I found your site. I am alone with him all the time and he mostly sits in his chair with his eyes closed. He is really no problem to take care of, but I cannot leave him alone. He fell and broke his hip this past year and he is a fall risk along with everything else that goes along with this dastardly disease.
Thanks for being here for all of us. The Lord only knows how much we need a place like this to run away to.
Nancy B There is no proper way to join our wonderful group. We just fell into it. Here you will find fellow sufferers who understand what you are going through. We will be with you all the way-no holds barred.
Just reading your three messages has made me tear up. I believe we don't realize how much we miss hearding a kind word directed to US until suddenly someone holds out their arms or says something sweet , we realize that our emotional buckets have run completely dry. Then, out of nowhere, the tears just pour. Thank you so much. ...Nancy
I can relate to both of you--we are close to 4 yrs from dx too. Nancy B--you didn't mention ages in your posts, but Mrs. T., you will find that there are many here whose LO's were diagnosed prior to 65. Since my husband was dx at almost 60, that made it harder to find others in the same situation. This website is great because it will put you in touch with people you would never have found otherwise, who are living the same life you are.
MarilyninMD, I am 69 and my husband is 81. We married 18 years ago, and looked forward to years of loving companionship and travel. He's a former DuPont executive and diplomat (Reagan administration). I was an interior designer. He was formally diagnosed 4 years ago..but looking back, I believe he demonstrated early symptoms 8-9 years ago. It's been a nightmare for me,...he has chosen NEVER to discuss his condition..and to my knowledge has never uttered the word "Alzheimer". It's as if it is a huge secret that only WE know. (He's moving from Stage 5 to 6 rapidly).
Another welcome, Nancy B. Many of us can look back and see the signs of AD were there several years before finally being diagnosed. You're among understanding friends here. If you have a question, we all chip in and try to find an answer and if you have a new problem, someone has gone before you and can tell you the best way to handle it.
Today I had a rare total melt down. I cried 'out loud' in my closet for about 10 minutes. What brought it on was so insignificant. I was washing our little Havanese dog in the bathtub (which is a huge ordeal) and then having to blow dry his long fine coat to prevent mats and ear infections. The phone apparently rang 3 times and he didn't chose to answer it. It was on the table next to his chair. The fourth time, he picked up the phone, and it was our real estate agent wanting to show our home in 15 minutes. Originally she was giving me a one hour 'heads up'. Imagine the mess with a wet dog, drenched bathroom, and a Sunday paper strewed family room. I had to say "no", in THIS slow market. I am so tired of doing everything all by myself. I cannot even go to the bathroom without the phone in my hand. I'm at the very tip end of my rope. ...and I don't know if I even want to hold on anymore.
Nancy B take 2 deep breaths and hold on. Everything will pass. We all have these melt-downs. DH started the day with first time ever hitting me on the foot, spilled his coffee all over the place, had eating problems and I had to help him finish then a while ago I made us some chocolate pudding and he had it all over the table and floor. First time for all this. I hope tomorrow will be better and this is not visiting us to stay.
We are all tired of doing everything else but I don't know anything to do about it except keep hanging on. There is a better day coming.....so they say.... Good luck.
Welcome Nancy B, there is another thread of posts which dedicates to how the little things can come together to send us over the edge. I have been down after a tooth extraction and for 2days just wanted to be in bed and resting. every little minor thing that DH did, normally i can blow off and not pay attention to, seemed exaggerated and to add to my distress and anxiety. i wanted to scream but my headache kept me inline:)--so today is much better and so will yours. forget what was yesterday, and take only today, one day at a time. Divvi
Hi & Welcome Nancy B & Bille, I am sorry for your need to join our group, however, I am glad you found us. I am sure you will find everyone kind & helpful.
Hello, Nancy B. Welcome to our little family. It looks like you are on the rough ride down. Please know that we are all here to help and hold your hand. Join us when ever you can.
Normally, Joan herself would pop by to welcome you personally, but she is "lounging" around on a caregiver cruise (teaching classes, how lounging is that?!) I am the Officially Delegated Interim Alternative Welcome Wagon ... and however did I miss your first posts? I think your name is just too close to our Nancy T's. Or maybe I need a little lounging myself.
Be sure to check the home page -- www.thealzheimerspouse.com. It's full of interesting info -- I find something new every time I browse there. For example, in the menu on the left side, there are many topics filled with information. Joan always suggests that newcomers to the site read "Newly Diagnosed/New to this website" first, and then check out "Understanding the Dementia Experience". That's an article written by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller, and an excellent description of what is going on in our spouses' minds, and what we can do to help them feel safe and loved. When you get a chance, scroll through the "previous blogs". Joan starts her own "threads" as blogs, and they often end up being discussed on the message boards. I'm sure you'll find many topics you can relate to.
Joan started her own Zazzle store recently, at our request. There's a link in the menu, and another in the center of the page. The store has some really neat items, specially designed for us; and if you like, you can even design your own. Also, if you ever need to shop on amazon.com, come here to link into their site, and Joan will get a teeny commission from your purchase. (She has done everything -- set up this site and run it, set up the caregiver cruises, lobby Congress -- without any compensation. We need to make sure she finds some source of income so this site will stay here for us!)
Information on the home page itself is updated frequently with new blogs, news and/or information updates, so many of us check there every day.
You can search for topics of interest on the message boards, using the "search" button at the top of the page. Enter a key word that might be found in the title of the thread (click on the "topic" button) or in the posts (click on "comments") Note: this particular site will pull up any comments that have the key word anywhere in the post, even if it's part of a longer word, so you can enter, for example, "myoclon" and pull up posts that mention myoclonus and myoclonic jerks.
You can search for posts by a member, by entering the member's name followed by a colon, and then clicking on the "comments" button, and then the "search" button.
You can start a new thread by clicking on the "start a new discussion" link in the upper left-hand corner.
There are also several fun threads where we hope you'll post -- "What are the Age Groups?" (for the ages of our spouses), "Ages of the Caregivers", and "Where are you from?" And then there's my favorite, "Before dementia what did your spouse do for a living?"
Another great thread you'll want to be sure to read is "Caregiver Tips - Things I wish someone had told me back in Stage 2-3."
The people here are wonderful (as you are finally beginning to find out). Let us know what we can do to help you.
Welcome Ellcec, She posted under "Working & Caring" Ellen, I am sorry for your need to join us, however, I am sure you will find everyone kind, helpful & non-judgmental. Please feel free to post at anytime, someone is always here to answer & try to help, if only to hold your hand.