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      CommentAuthorm-mman*
    • CommentTimeNov 12th 2008
     
    I am 50 DW is 58 (I am the man who married the older woman)

    We got our Dx this year, she quit work in January.

    I just started posting recently. I know it aint gonna be a fun trip at all, but I do think I found the best board to hang out on.
    Thanks everyone, this is a good group with a well targeted audience.
    The 'spouse' factor DOES make everything different.
  1.  
    Hi MMarshall,

    Sorry you have to be among us, but happy you found us. You'll never find a more supportive and well informed group of caring people. I am 51 and my DH is 52. m-mman is so right when he refers to the spouse factor. Not to take away from anyone dealing with a parent or sibling, but we are a unique group with special issues. Hold our hands and hang on.
    • CommentAuthorBar-bra
    • CommentTimeNov 13th 2008
     
    A little more about us ..... we're on the West Coast of Canada. I am my husband's sole care giver 24/7/365. Next week we are to have an assessment done to determine what, if any, respite care we may be able to have. I don't really want or need anyone to come into the home to do any care giving .... all I would really like is a couple of days a week of Adult Day Care for my husband. He needs to see other people and interact with other people and I need some *me* time ...... I've been care giving since 2003 and I'll admit I'm starting to burn out.

    I bought a little 4# Yorkie a couple of months ago in the hopes she would become a *Therapy Dog* for my husband ..... it's turning out great in that Rosie seems to have picked up very quickly that my husband has some needs she can fulfill ..... she makes him smile and even laugh out loud at times ..... I'm so pleased! Every night she is up on the bed, as he's going to bed, and once he gets himself under the covers Rosie scampers up on his chest and flops down and gives him little *Rosie Kisses* all over his chin ....... my husband loves this and giggles like a child ........ a nice way to tuck him in at night :)
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeNov 13th 2008 edited
     
    Statistics: Ages of caregivers as of 11/13/08

    40 - 8
    50 -35
    60 - 22
    70 - 13
    80 - 2
    • CommentAuthorsandy D
    • CommentTimeNov 13th 2008
     
    I am 58. I am not sure what age I will be on my next birthday. My DH is 60. We have been married for 41 years..
  2.  
    sandy D, you will be 59. It's the 60th when you won't remember how old you are. <grin>
    • CommentAuthorsandy D
    • CommentTimeNov 13th 2008
     
    I think I just want to celebrate the 38th anniversary of my 21st birthday. That sounds more pleasant!
    • CommentAuthorjean
    • CommentTimeNov 13th 2008
     
    My spouse and I are both 66.We'll be married 45 years in Feb. He was diagnosed in 2004.
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeNov 13th 2008
     
    Statistics: Ages of caregivers as of 11/13/08

    40 - 8
    50 -36
    60 - 23
    70 - 13
    80 - 2
  3.  
    I am 66
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeNov 16th 2008
     
    Statistics: Ages of caregivers as of 11/16/08

    40 - 8
    50 -36
    60 - 24
    70 - 13
    80 - 2
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeNov 17th 2008
     
    Sending to the top for new members.
    • CommentAuthorMawzy*
    • CommentTimeNov 17th 2008
     
    I am 77. Married almost 59 years. DH is 82. (I was a child bride (silly grin).
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 4th 2008
     
    Sending to the top for new members.
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 7th 2008
     
    Sending to the top for new members.
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 9th 2008
     
    ttt for new members.
    • CommentAuthornancyt
    • CommentTimeDec 9th 2008
     
    I'm 63 and DH is 76. Lewy Body Dementia diagnosed in Aug. this year. Parkinson like symptoms that didn't respond to Sinemet. On Excelon and Namenda. Looking back symptoms for several years. Not sure of stage, needs direction, help with all hygeine, feeds self and uses a walker and sometimes needs a wheelchair. Symptoms fluctuate at times. The Neuro. said this is common. I've left work and take full care of him. Often read the blogs and find them helpful. Sometimes it seems no one really understands what we are going through, then I realize you all are in this too and you do understand. Thanks
    • CommentAuthorSusanB
    • CommentTimeDec 9th 2008
     
    I'm 53, to be 54 next month.
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 10th 2008
     
    Statistics: Ages of caregivers as of 12/10/08

    40 - 8
    50 -37
    60 - 25
    70 - 13
    80 - 2
    • CommentAuthorIowawife
    • CommentTimeDec 11th 2008
     
    I am 64 and husband is 84
    • CommentAuthorsanjosepat
    • CommentTimeDec 11th 2008 edited
     
    I am 67 and domestic partner is 65
  4.  
    I am 65 and hubby is 86. We have beem married for 38 years.
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 11th 2008
     
    Statistics: Ages of caregivers as of 12/11/08

    40 - 8
    50 -37
    60 - 28
    70 - 13
    80 - 2
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 11th 2008
     
    Hmmm ... two more May-December romances. Kadee, I don't suppose you've been keeping track of those ... ?
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 18th 2008
     
    Sunshyne, Sorry, I haven't been keeping track of the May-December romances.

    Sending to the top for any new members.
    • CommentAuthorEvalena
    • CommentTimeDec 18th 2008
     
    I’ve been wondering about the number of May/December couples, too. I scanned the Age of the Caregivers and What Are the Age Groups topics and found 26 couples who differ in age by more than 10 years.
    Please forgive me if I included or excluded you in error. Carolyn, pamsc, and wheatleygirl1 seem to have 10-year age differences.

    Amber
    briegull
    chris r
    Diane T
    divvi
    Evalena
    faithful
    Gay
    Iowawife
    Jean21
    Jenene 56
    jules
    Mary 75
    MaryT
    nancyt
    New Realm
    Nikki
    oldbiker
    redbud73086
    shoegirl
    Sunshyne
    texasgirl
    TheQueen
    therrja
    Vickie
    Weejun
    • CommentAuthorbriegull*
    • CommentTimeDec 18th 2008
     
    So roughly a quarter of us. NOW, Kaydee, I wonder for how many of us 10+ ers it's a second marriage. TO start it off, mine is not.
    • CommentAuthorMsAbby*
    • CommentTimeDec 18th 2008
     
    I'm 57 and spouse 61. Feel older...
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 19th 2008 edited
     
    Statistics: Ages of caregivers as of 12/19/08

    40 - 8
    50 -38
    60 - 29
    70 - 13
    80 - 2
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 19th 2008
     
    Evalena, you're my type of people. Thanks!

    Second marriage for me ... first husband died of cancer.
  5.  
    I am 60 and hubby is 80. We are married for 34 years.
    • CommentAuthorEvalena
    • CommentTimeDec 19th 2008
     
    You're welcome, Sunshyne. Excel is a wonderful thing. I hope my figures are close to being accurate.
    First (and last!) marriage for me.
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 20th 2008
     
    ttt for Kim
  6.  
    Second marriage for me. Second marriage for my DH - his first wife died of MS - he cared for her until her death. Now I'm caring for him. We have been married 35 years 12/23!
    • CommentAuthorDarleneC
    • CommentTimeDec 20th 2008
     
    I guess we buck the norm here. My dh is 66 and I am 74. We were married 32 years ago last Thursday. We had so many good years together, before AD came along. Who would know I would be the one caring for him. It is the second marriage for both of us;. We married when my girls were teen-agers.
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 21st 2008
     
    Vickie, happy anniversary!
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      CommentAuthorchris r*
    • CommentTimeDec 21st 2008
     
    that's an interesting thought Evelena. I was noticing how many of us were may december, just as I was reading, and you wondered how many of us were secondtimers. My husband and I have been married 32 yrs. second time for me, fourth time for him. (he married his first wife twice). None lasted very long. We went together for 6 yrs before marriage, We were both pretty gunshy, and with his record I had to be really sure. I had 2 small children at the time. there is a study for those in second marriages where they are doing some sort of research on second marriages, where one is the caregiver. the email for the researcher if anyone is interested is Carey Sherman mailto:careyws@isr.umich.edu. and yes, you can do it on email, if that's more convenient for you. They already called me concerning being in the study, and I think they are very much interested in getting as many as they can.
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 21st 2008
     
    Sigh. Okay, okay, Chris, I'll send Carey an email. I'm JUST finishing up one caregiver study done by internet, and have agreed to be a guinea pig in another that runs for five years and requires in-home interviews and medical workups (blood, ultrasound, etc). A friend from the AD research center appealed to me, what else could I do?
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 22nd 2008
     
    ttt for Frustratedspouse
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 25th 2008
     
    ttt for new members
  7.  
    Sunshyne, thanks for the happy anniversary! I did get the right card - not a birthday card like last year! Things are getting better (sigh). It was a day late - he said "oh, today is our anniversary" and I said "yes, happy anniversary - and gave him a card. He smiled, kissed me and said "now where did I put your card?" then that lightbulb look came over him and he got up and went to get it! 35 years and he's still the love of my life.
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 25th 2008
     
    What a nice smile for the day...
  8.  
    I'm a new member--this is my first post. I'm 60 and my husband is 64, diagnosed with AD at 59.
  9.  
    frustratedspouse

    I'm 39 husband is 41 been married 18 years in Feb 09. we met 25 years ago I was 14 he was 16 been together ever since ( except a couple of hiccups along the way when dating ) noticed things were not right about 5 years ago. Hubby was diagnosed 8 months ago.
    • CommentAuthorKadee*
    • CommentTimeDec 27th 2008
     
    Statistics: Ages of caregivers as of 12/27/08
    30- 1
    40 - 8
    50 -38
    60 -31
    70 - 13
    80 - 2
    • CommentAuthordivvi*
    • CommentTimeDec 27th 2008
     
    This is my 3rd,,,yes, third...marriage.:) and my last unless i can find a super billionaire...we joke in my family i can have a silver anniversary if i add them all together... this time around was the love of my life, still is. Divvi
    • CommentAuthorSunshyne
    • CommentTimeDec 27th 2008 edited
     
    Hey, divvi, you already GOT one well-to-do hubby. Don't be selfish ... kindly leave the super billionaire for one of us ... <grin>
  10.  
    Hi everyone...I'm 53, my hubby is 63...married 33 years
    •  
      CommentAuthorNew Realm*
    • CommentTimeDec 27th 2008 edited
     
    This is my second, divvi. At this point in my emotional life I don't ever intend to be married again. But if I do, I sure hope and pray the third time is the charm. First one was 3 yrs ( I was an 18 yr old bride). This, the second will be 20 yrs in 2009. I am highly suspicious that we won't be having a 25th. DH is already going into later stage 6, and his decline is fairly rapid.
  11.  
    Well, I was only married once....it lasted over 40 years before he died. Have no desire to marry again or even be involved in any kind of relationship....I am enjoying being on my own and doing my own "thing." Besides at my age, 61, I would probably end up having to take care of another man....no thank you!!!